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168,499 In general, I don't like most people...



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168,498 I dunno... I feel pretty good when I kiss your husband...



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168,497 Tonight's the second full moon this month...Blue moon. Enjoy your night..



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168,496 I absolutely, 100% HATE it that people knowingly and willfully lie to my face.  They make promises that they not only have no intention of keeping, but also completely lack the ability to carry out even if they wanted to.

This is the second time it has happened and it has ruined my life.  Truly, it has RUINED my family and life.

There is nothing left.



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168,495 somewhere deep inside, you must know i miss you



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168,494 When I kiss my husband, I feel nothing.



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168,493 My wife continues to buy herself things even though we have no money. She came home today with a new pair of running shoes. She just bought new running shoes two weeks ago. Now today she says she needs this new pair. She says she doesn't like the pair from two weeks ago. She knows we have no money. I've discussed it with her endlessly. But she ignores me. This leaves me so depressed. Her selfishness is driving us to bankruptcy. We are going to lose the house. But she'll have plenty of running shoes. I hate how she can behave this way with no remorse.



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168,492 I fear I may remain second fiddle or less for the duration.



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168,491 I had pin worms as a child.  In the 3rd world, they're pretty common.  At night they wiggle out of your butt.  Nothing makes your skin crawl more.  I would grab a mirror and watch with a pair of tweezers at the ready to pluck them off.  This is just too gross to admit to anyone.



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168,490 Whenever I'm home alone and I'm getting ready to fart, I cup my hands around my butthole, fart into the cupped hand, and then quickly raise said hand to my nose.  I simply cannot let these luscious farts go to waste.



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168,489 horizontally speaking, of course.



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168,488 Things don't work out, start over. Things don't work out a second time, start over.


After she totally reinvented herself for the second time, I totally expected to hear about how she took the world by storm, but it hasn't happened. It might have something to do do with integrity. Maybe she's just chasing the thrill of something new, which means it's probably about time to start over.



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168,487 I'm falling for a co-worker less than half my age. When did I become that type of woman?



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168,486 My laptop died. Looking at my prospects I can see I'll be able to afford a new one never. Did I choose minimalism or did minimalism choose me?



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168,485 I really really need you, E.  Please please please call me.



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168,484 The trolls have been having some fun today on here it may seem.I have to comment on the poster wishing someone to have cancer and c diff. and die.That is really sick and mean spirited.You must be angry but be careful often when you wish ill on someone it bounces back to you in some form.Be careful what you type and think.



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168,483 Somewhere along the way I went from being the guy who loved to sneak a peak up a woman's skirt as she shifted her legs -- to being the guy who looks away when that awkward moment arrives.

My maturity level has reached 100%.

My fun level has gone to 0%.

In other words, I've become an old prude.



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168,482 Ill be cheating on my GF tonight, in a hotel.  i kind of feel guilty. but i'm still doing it.



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168,481 Some animals have the ability to smell cancer.



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168,480 Sometimes I feel like the only reason I keep my job is because they can't find someone with the right combination of sexy, smart, and entertaining. I'm just enough of all those things to keep my wallet full.

But you know, there isn't anyone who could do my job better than me and not be a stick in the mud. This place is crazy and will probably be the craziest group of bosses I ever have. I'm fine with that. When I'm older and hopefully more successful, I'm gonna owe a lot of it to this job. I wonder if they know how much this job changed my life...



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168,479 I can see cancer...but c diff is a bitch.



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168,478 Maybe you should share a picture of pink straw hats first and see if they do in return.



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168,477 I have a cat that cries out every time I pick my nose.  He'll be in the room facing away from me and suddenly, "Meow!"  And yip, there is my finger stuck up my nose.  What could he possibly be hearing that bothers him so much?  He also cries out when I sneeze or blow my nose.  That I understand.  But digging out boogers does not "sound" like anything!?!?



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168,476 Every time I go to the store, I conveniently forget to buy panty liners for my wife.  Tampons and pads are OK.  But panty liners?  Whoops!

Guess I'll just have to keep on "lining" the crotch of her used panties with my tongue.



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168,475 I use an american flag as a table cloth for my summer picnics. I'm not sure that's what the founding fathers had in mind.



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168,474 My boy friend has never really tried to give me an orgasm.  He said I have to tell him how but we never have enough time for more than a quickie.  This is bothering me lately but I am reluctant to bring it up.



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168,473 I mean nothing to my wife. Except I'm her own personal cash machine. Time for me to go.



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168,472 I hope you get cancer, contact C. Diff and die. Fuck you, bitch.



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168,471 They left. I feel rested, so I'm going to be productive. It started back in school. I use to sleep right out in the open, in the middle of the day. I'm more productive if I sleep for a little bit, than if I try to work through fatigue. I have a large bottle of adderal at home, but I can sleep on that stuff too. I don't bother with coffee either. Guess I'll get back to work.



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168,470 I'm sure one day my husband will initiate sex. It's just slipped his mind -- for the last 11 years.



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168,469 This is the time of year when my wife's family visits and they tell me how I'm incorrectly raising my children.

Let's see, my children get great grades. They are leads in the school play. They win all sorts of awards.

Your children have tattoos and nose piercings and dropped out.

Yes, thanks for the parenting advice.

.



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168,468 What if words could truly connect us to each other in a way that would make all of us understand one another? How great would that be? Then we could know the depths of each other's joy and suffering and share it. Unashamedly and beautifully.



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168,467 I would move mountains to be with you. You have no idea. Just say the word and it's done.



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168,466 I love you very much.  I am so sorry. I want this to work out for us.



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168,465 Dr. Cute,
I have no idea what happened?!?! Where did you go? You were the first man in years that I felt comfortable and safe to share myself with. I trusted and respected you. I meant what I said.....I am here for you in the good and bad times. I miss our easy and intellectual rapport. I will give you a second chance. I hope you contact me again! AND, you owe me a kiss....
Anne



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168,464 Once they get your medication straight you will feel human again. Sometimes they have to either remove it or radiate it to make it nonfunctional but I promise you will get better. I'm sorry you are going through this.



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168,463 Fuck you, prudes. I 'cheat' so I can be really there for a great person who can't provide everything necessary. Our relationship is great and we are happy. Your guilt trip bitchings are just your own opinions, not fact, and certainly not reality.



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168,462 I made a comment a while back about people who blame their weight gain on thyroid conditions.
I take it back. Really, it was ignorant of me.
I never realized how devestating a thyroid condition was until I learned firsthand.
I was contemplating suicide.
That's how badly I felt. & I wasted away to 115 lbs, losing 10 lbs in less than 2 weeks.
I lost the milk I was producing to feed my baby.
I am basically bipolar, psychotic, insane.
Hot all the time.
Violent body tremors.
Stress.
Resting heart rate of 135.
Insomnia.
Yeah, this is what the thyroid is capable of doing to a body.



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168,461 I've needed to sleep at work all week. The bosses come and go. I get energy and do some work, and I tell myself to keep going, then they show up. I need to know they'll be gone for half a day so I can get a solid hour or two of sleep. I've been so tired at work this week that I thought I would prefer to be dead, all while my boss is sitting at his desk right next to me. I'm getting tired just thinking about it.



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168,460 Posting your problems on facebook makes you look pathetic. No wonder nobody wants to be friends with you.



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168,459 I don't bitch to you about my problems. I would like the same in return. I don't deal with problems by talking about them and I don't understand people who do. Just leave me alone. I'm depressed and I don't need to fucking hear it from you. You have no idea how much I don't care.



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168,458 No one likes me. I tell myself I don't care. But I do.



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168,457 The company where I work lets us work from home many days. I love it. But of course I don't want to work when I'm home. The company thought of this. They make us use a special login program that let's the boss remotely know that I've been pecking away at my keyboard. He gets to see exactly how long since I pressed a key.

The IT wizards to the rescue. The boss doesn't know, but the IT guys outfitted my computer so I run a special program and it makes it look like I'm typing. Even though I'm at the movies! Yeah IT guys!



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168,456 ....When your girlfriend goes to the Dr. and has blood tests...always that ping of being scared you gave her something. haha. safe this time! whew



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168,455 Secrecy is the enemy of intimacy. Every healthy relationship is built on a foundation of honesty and trust.



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168,454 Cheating isn't always kissing, touching, or flirting. If you gotta delete text messages or phone calls so your partner won't see them, you're already there.



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168,453 I wish things had turned out differently, but no matter what I will always be your BB



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168,452 I don't get what the big deal is about makeup.  It makes women's faces look ridiculous.  How can I take anyone seriously who has paint on their eyes, cheeks, and lips?



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168,451 I just used my vibrator about 6 times in the last 2 hours and I am still horny.



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168,450 Oh, and the religious leaders in Iraq, both Sunni, and shia have joined hands as a militia at the behest of a Fatwa encouraging every Iraqi to join hands and rid their country of this menace.



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168,449 I am unsure of my ability to quantify the following, as it is information I've heard via word of mouth.

I was told the Islamic State, ISIS, ISIL, whatever, has encourage the rapacity of women and girls, and they are offering a bounty of sorts for such barbarous behaviour.

I was told last night Hillary Clinton is a potential campaign candidate for the democratic ticket. Evidently she said in a statement that "we need to reach out to the aforementioned group, so as to better understand their point of view and cultural norms", or some such thing.

There are many words I could choose to eloquently raze the character of both. Upon "hearing" these things, what can I say?

I will say from what I've learned about the two groups, one is nearly a communist, and the other, as described by a Muslim of some standing, "is a enemy to humanity".

They both need to fall flat upon their face, and swept aside once and for all! No good will arise from either!



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168,448 When someone says they don't care what other people think of them ----- you can be sure they absolutely care what other people think of them.



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168,447 Last night I dreamed that my ex Facetimed me, and he was naked. He panned the camera down until I could see his erection and he grabbed the base of it and wiggled it at me. I didn't notice before, but then I saw my camera view and suddenly I was naked too! I blushed and got nervous saying it was a mistake, but he just had that knowing smile on his face like he knew I wanted him. Clearly there's still some sexual desires between us, but honestly I feel like I have dreams like this when I haven't had sex in a while. Oh well.



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168,446 Last night I had a dream that obese cartoon men were raping people. They had this instinct that told them where to find people they hadn't raped, and they would find every person in that area and rape them one by one. For some reason they never tried to rape me, but it was still scary to watch. They would make any males they'd rape wear fake breasts, and once one of them shouted "CAVE!" as he raped a woman so much smaller than him that I couldn't see her beneath his fat rolls. Moral of the story is no more Chinese food before bed.



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168,445 I only think of you on two occasions... that's day and night...



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168,444 Sometimes I like to fantasize about you giving me a ring. I'm nowhere near ready for that level of commitment but I like the thought of it. I haven't even told you I love you yet haha.



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168,443 I've been hiding money from my husband.



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168,442 I feel this is more a worthy place to say than anywhere given what I've seen so far. Funny, it took my insanity to get me here, and though your role was so limited, if not non-existent, it was the most critical. You and an overactive imagination. Though I struggle with the decisions I've made throughout life, and most particularly those two years and even my most recent endeavor, I know it was for the best. Hell, even coming back, I've returned to the old me and the new me was much better. Problems don't resolve themselves, but at least I do feel now that I'm doing something worthy to contribute to others. Something that speaks volumes even when you're one among millions. And as must as I hate to admit it sometimes, but mostly because what I wish I could do to show my gratitude is the last thing I'd ever be able to do in an impossible dream, it's still the greatest gift I ever got. You set me free from myself. I gave you my entire being without ever physically touching you, seeing you, hearing you, smelling you and conquering you. May it always serve you better than it ever did me.



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168,441 I'll always be in the background of your life. You will never get rid of me. Everywhere you turn, there I'll be. You will never make me stop loving you -and eventually that shrew will be gone and we can celebrate our love. <3



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168,440 I miss you. You have my heart. I've been ignoring you for almost four months. It's tough. I want to reply. I want to call. I want to run to you. We haven't been together in a year and a half. It feels like forever. My feelings haven't wavered. Please email me. I'll respond.



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168,439 These cop stories really strike a nerve with me.

I'm just a middle aged black professional that's never had a run in with the law.

I was racially profiled in a little Wisconsin town a few years ago.

It was humiliating for all of us.

I'm black, my boyfriend white.
We were in a residential area, parked on the side of the road looking up a place to brunch in the area on our phones.

A squad car pulls up behind us.  One officer asks my boyfriend questions (are you from around here, what are you doing parked on the side of the road, etc).

As he politely explains a second officer comes up to my passenger side window peering in the backseat of the SUV.
My son, whom was 7 months old at the time, was in the carseat in back.

For some reason, they ask us both to get out the car and "we're going to do a quick search in the car, could you hop out please?"

I wish I could go back in time to that moment, I had no idea what my rights were then.

I said okay (it really wasn't a question, their posturing said they were going to anyway).  So I got my child out the car.

We stood on the side of the road while they thoroughly searched the car, my purse, diaper bag for something.

I stood there, humiliated, as cars slowed and rubber necked us.

They found nothing of course. What cause did they have to search in the first place??

They did cuff my boyfriend for not having his ID on him.  He was local to the area and simply forgot it.

In the squad car he asked them point blank, if we were all vanilla white or he was by himself they wouldn't have gave him any trouble.

They didn't say anything to the contrary.  

I followed them to the police station where they let him go an hour later with a warning.

There have been other times I've run into some pretty rude cops, one nice cop but that one took the cake.

Never again.  I know my rights now and I'm getting a dash cam.



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168,438 I'm a guy. I work all day. I come home and make myself spaghetti or a can of soup. On the weekends I clean the house and the yard. I get down and my knees and scrub the floors, and vacuum spider webs, and mow the grass.

You want to know why all this is a secret?

I'm married. My wife does shit. I once pleaded with her to vacuum a mess she left on the floor. She couldn't even figure out how to turn the vacuum on because she never ever uses it.

I am so disappointed in my marriage. I never saw this coming. I think marriage changes some women. I think it brings out their selfishness. I'm sure the same is true for some men. There are just some people who like to take advantage. I married one of those people and I'm miserable.



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168,437 Yeah, like it's my fault you cheated on me....  Um... I don't THINK so.  
I don't think you're done with it either, and I WILL know if you do it again!



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168,436 Bodylotion girl here, there can be a lot of exceptions though to the comment beneath. Girls can love sex as much as guys. My boyfriend gets so worn out by me that he does not want me to touch his hero after a few hours. I find it funny, because I know I can make him hard almost anytime. He just doesn't like it when it's hurting so much haha. Oke can you notice I haven't seen him in 3 days lol.



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168,435 A girl getting laid is a matter of choice.  

A guy getting laid is a matter of chance.  



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168,434 Ladies, a tip for you. put body lotion on your legs just before your boyfriend/husband sees you, he will love it. I was wearing shorts in the house and my boyfriend could not stop touching my legs haha. I guess it's a win-win for you, your boyfriend and your now moisturized body :)



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168,433 When someone is so impossible to get along with, so helplessly self absorbed, so totally inept and devoid of practical life skills, they conveniently make the decision easy for you. Leave and don't look back.



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168,432 Tip of the day.  I started doing most of my own car repairs.  If you Google what you are trying to fix and the year and make of your car there are videos on how to fix or replace most anything on a car.  Easy peasy.

In my state, if you take your car in for repairs, the repair shop has to give you the old parts.  This past weekend I replaced the entire exhaust system from the engine manifold down to the muffler.  I ordered the part online and it fit like a glove (this car is a 1998 and this had never been done before).  I had to change it because there was a hole in the flexible pipe and it sounded pretty loud, plus the car runs like a dream and probably has five good years left in it.

Anyway, I had the old rusted pipes and catalytic converter sitting in my garage when I remembered thieves like to steal these and sell them for scrap.  I Googled where to sell your catalytic converter and there was a place about five miles from my home.  I took the part there and they gave me $50.  The new part was $280 so the total cost to me was $230.  The job took about two hours because the old one took a long time to get out (I had to cut off rusted on bolts).  I believe this saved me about $500 off of what a shop would have charged me.

So even if you take your car in and they tell you they have to replace the catalytic converter, ask for the old part back and go sell it to recoup your loss a bit!



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168,431 I posted on fb that I am still happily married. Why am I lying? I'm really unhappy. There is no love between us any more. It is more a marriage of convenience now, for both of us. I can't decide if it is worth going it alone and be happy and poor, or stay together and be comfortable but unhappy.



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168,430 I guess when the highs stop coming and all you're left with are the lows, it's time to move on.



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168,429 Well, f**k. I guess I was hoping that a certain someone was calling me perfect. I should've known better. I'm just embarrassed now.



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168,428 The first time I ever masturbated was in a car. I was about 15. My mom wanted to go shopping at the mall. I came along for the ride. She went into the stores and I stayed in the car. I have no idea why, but while sitting there alone I started rubbing my cock through my pants. By a few minutes later I had unzipped my pants and instinctively jerked myself off. Gobs of cum shot out of me, landing on my tshirt and the car seat. I cleaned it off as best I could with some McDonalds napkins I found in the back seat. I remember the napkins smelled like french fries. To this day, when I smell McDonalds french fries I think of my cum in that car.



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168,427 My pussy doesn't smell bad, it has a normal vagina scent, but my boyfriend hates it. It really bums me out when he stops in the middle of sex and gets up to go shower. Seriously, just deal with it if you want to have sex.



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168,426 You all bitch, moan, whine & complain about how awful marriage is and how much you hate being parents and then you ask me when I'm getting married. Why? So I' can be as miserable as you? No thanks.



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168,425 Incredibly perfectly imperfect. My wonderful new boyfriend. Or my wonderful new hallucination.



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168,424 Every period you get after a miscarriage is a punch to the gut.



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168,423 Im knitting a blanket for a baby I will never have. I wish that I could have held you and told you about my family that has passed. Now I pray that they will hold you and tell you about me. Im sorry, sweet boy, that my body could not carry you to term. I will miss you forever.



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168,422 https://www.facebook.com/*********** please add me... I have no one to talk to,I feel very lonely,I think I'm going to kill myself...



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168,421 I'm going to kick out my room mate because she's got this text book perfect "Rich kid" syndrom. Seriously she fucking lies about having fucking having a heroine problem.

She lies about what she does with her money/

She lies about her work as a stripper
she "hates" her dad and black males him
She has burned every bridge she has cause she can't fucking pick up after herself...Its...bullshit.

I have a 9 month old son
I have a husband
She's lived with me two and a half months and hasn't given me a dime towards fucking rent, electric hasn't brought any food home

Sleeps all fucking day
Washed her nasty fucking striper thong with my fucking body wash in the bathtub and left it on my kids fucking bath toys.

She's nasty lazy and I really can't fucking handle it

I had to leave my house for a few days when I get home she has three days to get her shit or I fucking get it out for her.

End of story



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168,420 I hate that everything is always my fault. 4 years of marriage and everything is always my fault. You can do literally the exact same thing, but your explanation is always reasonable. You make me feel like I'm losing my mind. I almost believe you sometimes, that I'm the bad one, until I realize that you're trying to control me.



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168,419 I'm embarrassed at home messy my house is. I never invite people here. I always meet them somewhere else.



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168,418 At first it was hard to sleep next to you. Now, I can't get to sleep without you.



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168,417 I have $487,982 hidden in a public place. I work a normal job and live a normal life. But I do little things like leave change in a pop machine. Tip decently. Pay off internet and other bills of people I do not know. I have done some good with the bad I lived. But I am alone. My name is not my name. My hair is not my hair
But my movie collection will always be mine.



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168,416 I think you are so incredibly perfect that I sort of think I am hallucinating you and am actually drooling in a mental hospital somewhere.



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168,415 I just came so, so, so good thinking about you licking me! You were really going at it, too! I may not have you, but I've still got my fantasies. No, no they can't take those away from me.



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168,414 My father commuted two hours to work every morning and two hours home every night. He'd leave before I got up for school and came home at 10ᚼ in the evening, after I was already in bed. On the weekends he'd sleep until noon, have lunch and then head to a bar to watch sports.  Couple this with the fact I had 8 brothers and sisters all clamoring for attention, and basically it meant I never had a conversation with him. Quite literally months would go by and we wouldn't say a word to each other. Not that he even noticed. And not that I even cared. He meant nothing to me.

At 17 I moved out and never saw him again. And I certainly didn't speak to him again. Then 30 years later I heard he died. I didn't go to the funeral. I thought why waste the time going to his funeral when I could be spending the time with my own children. I love hanging out with my kids. I've never understood why my dad had no interest in me.



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168,413 I kinda snicker at people who believe in god.



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168,412 One of the most charming things about you is your witty humor. It's one of the things that make it impossible for me to stop loving you. Your status update yesterday made me giggle good. Btw, I would not be sorry to beat you at that game (or any other). In fact, it would give me great pleasure to slide into you and knock you back to the beginning. If only we could go back to the start.



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168,411 I wonder if you'll be walkin' in Memphis tonight? I would've loved to road trip it with you.



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168,410 I masturbate and think of my temple elder Ben.
This is my secret and it stays buried here. Oh how oh how am I going to continue going to events like "nothing is up"



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168,409 When you introduced me as a friend this weekend it really hurt.  I don't want to be your fuck buddy. I thought I made that clear..



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168,408 I hate when people post pictures of their food. What makes you think we want to see a picture of what will be your future poop?



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168,407 People have forgotten how to apologize. Maybe they think apologies don't work. Well they do with me. It's so rare though for anyone to go that route.



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168,406 Eww. There's this woman who gets under my skin. She's so gross. She's fat but pretends to be fit. She's says such stupid things but pretends to be smart (oh yea, like we can't see through that act.) She's selfish but pretends to be helpful. She lectures us about healthy eating but then posts pictures of her bacon and egg breakfast sandwich.

So many people get annoyed with her. She has no idea how much we talk about her. She posts something to facebook and this spurs 20 private messages to be sent by people mocking her.

I try to stay away from these conversations. I don't like this woman, but I take satisfaction in knowing that the combination of her fatness, her age and her bacon and egg sandwiches will kill her off soon enough.



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168,405 I think this is the only forum on the entire world wide web where rudeness isn't tolerated at all. I love it. I've been watching. If you say something mean against someone else here, your post is deleted and you can't access the website anymore. I know, this happened in my dorm a few years ago. Some people were banned and when they tried to access the website, they were sent to Yahoo. Thank you to whoever is policing this place. I feel safe here. More websites should ban rude posters.



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168,404 My hubby and I have been watching Mad Men on DVD.  We watch a few episodes each night. After one episode he said it was so fake, women don't go to a bar and just pickup a guy and fuck him. He said that never happens.

Uhm ------- I didn't want to argue back with him, but in my twenties I did that a number of times. I just wanted to be with someone for the evening. I'd go to some public gathering place. I'd start talking to a nice looking guy. If he could conjugate sentences, I'd take him home and make him very happy.

It sounds to me like my hubby was never so lucky. LOL.



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168,403 I use my size to intimidate people. I'm 6 foot 3 inches tall and 220 pounds, all muscle. When someone acts up and wants to harass people, I get in the their face. Every single time the asshole backs down. I've never once had to throw a punch. This is of course for the best, but secretly I wish one of the assholes would throw a punch my way so I could crush his skull. It's never happened tho.



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168,402 You devalued your Unique Selling Point by pretending to be someone else.



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168,401 Jimmy's got a big brain. I wonder if it's bigger than his... Anywho, the story of his treatment of that girl is one that smarts. :p  



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168,400 Straight people assume I'm gay and gay people assume I'm straight. Huh?



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