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169,299 I did it, as usual.  First step.



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169,298 See, this is why I know I'm not going to keep this job forever. This job has done a lot for me, even housed me, which seriously crosses the boundaries of the usual employer/employee relationship. I couldn't appreciate this any more than I do, and I fully realize the weight of what this job has done for me.

But I refuse to keep a job that will always be a dead end job (if dead end means there's no room for promotions, which there aren't). Especially because I'm the assistant to 4 bosses, and they don't consider me or the senior assistant important enough to give information to unless they need it documented. This is particularly bad when they neglect to tell us about events or meetings, because they sat around a table and decided to tell someone  something and then never followed through. I refuse to grow old at a job that doesn't respect me. On the other hand, they've put up with a bit of disrespect from me, so I don't make a fuss about it (except online, lol).

I love this job, I do. But I know I won't have it forever because it's not a job any self-respecting woman would have. I want to be a leader, not an assistant for the rest of my life. This may be good now while I'm a 21 year old drop out, but when I get my degree and I'm older and better seasoned for the workplace, I will spread my wings and fly out of here.



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169,297 The thing a guy least wants to hear:

Let's just cuddle.



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169,296 I'm sad. I'm not sure how my marriage got to this point. But I know I don't like it. My husband and I started out as equals. We both worked in a large company as professionals. Ten years later I'm home making peanut butter sandwiches for our son's lunch while my husband goes to work everyday and does important things with other adults. If feel like I got the short end of the stick. Why doesn't he stay home and make sandwiches while I go to work?



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169,295 Sometimes my wife will go out and disable the app on her phone which lets me see where she is. What the fuck is that about?



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169,294 So last night I found a cat, well we found a cat,
After several checks over his body we found him to not be able to use his lags appropriately and his bones are sticking out everywhere, emaciated is the word I'm looking for, so people will break windows for dogs and children yet this cat who domesticated himself and bound himself to a human picks a human who decides it's ok not to feed or water your cats, I don't get why cats trust people? Yeah maybe it's not the best post of the year, but in essence I feel this cat, I pick my humans carelessly knowing I am fragile and in essence no one would "break the window"
For me. Bringing this guy home means if we are caught with his furry bums we lose everything, but it was wrong to leave him there, he came to us, would have starved awoke to him meowing not to be let out but to be fed again and petted, so if we can show this love to an animal maybe we can to each other too.
Other words what's the fuckimg point? If you can't love something that shows you love no matter the circumstance, how can you love a human with ups and downs and pain and emotion?  Not saying that cats especially don't have feelings I'm saying it's a farse whomever owned this cat didn't care enough to even feed him, I just don't get it.



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169,293 I extended a gentle invitation to a younger fellow I know from repertory theatre. I said there would be no anger or retribution if he wasn't interested.

See... to me, NO means NO. Less than enthusiastic acceptance means NO.  He has things to do. All right, he can do so.

But if he doesn't adore me, he can go fuck himself.



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169,292 Every few weeks I copy and save the list of all the people who friended me on facebook. When I see the number go down, I compare the current list to the saved list and I always know exactly who stopped being my friend.

Message for you ---> Sorry if I bore you, but go fuck yourself.



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169,291 If my husband ever cheated on my I'd cut his balls off while he slept.

Sleep tight honey!



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169,290 Her back hurts. She tells me she might have cancer of the spine.

An hour later her neck hurts. She's worried it might be meningitis.

Just before going to bed she had a headache. She's concerned it's a brain aneurysm. She wants me to check her breathing and heart rate throughout the night.

This is what life is like when you marry a hypochondriac.



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169,289 Once you go a few rounds with a person who enjoys harming another deliberately, I don't care how fragile you are, something astonishing happens to you.
Nothing riles you anymore.  Fear is gone.  You have faced the worst of the worst and survived.
Now they fear you.



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169,288 I have a love/hate relationship with myself.



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169,287 A girlfriend once tried to give me a handjob in a movie theater but I was too scared we'd get caught so I couldn't stay hard. I tried to explain this to her afterwards but I sounded like a loser making excuses. This was many years ago.

On my mental to do list, I'd like to get a handjob in a movie theater just to prove to myself I can do it. I'm thinking I can send the former girfriend a note all these years later saying something like, "Hi, remember me? I just want you to know a woman jerked me off in the movies today. Ha! Hope all is well with you..." :)



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169,286 I have a friend who works in the financial industry as a trader. He makes big bucks. This weekend he thought he was having a heart attack. An ambulance came to his house and whisked him off to the hospital. False alarm. He lost $200,000 trading oil futures in the past week. I spoke with his wife. She said this has happened twice before where he lost a load of money and thought he was having a heart attack!

Like holy shit dude, give it up already. You are 46 years old. You can't have this kind of stress. One day the heart attack will be real. But you do it so you can afford to have a swimming pool in your yard and play golf at a swanky country club? Really? You will let your children grow up without a father tomorrow so you can afford expensive bottles of wine today?

I kinda hope you do die. Maybe your children would learn from the experience. I'm afraid you are too far gone to be saved.



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169,285 I'm afraid of almost everything. Weird fears, like a plane will fall from the sky and crash on me. I am nervous, my heart often races. I have obsessive thoughts, like I think the same thing over and over for hours. I have dark thoughts, like I want to grab a pair of scissors and stab a random person. I'm pretty messed up.

But I hide it so well. I'm the person you come to when you need somebody to count on. I'm the responsible one. If people only knew how screwed up I am on the inside, they'd probably call the police.



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169,284 When I have a herpes breakout, i pop them like they are Bubblewrap! then put Tea Tree Oil on it.  dries out immediately. Actually a great technique, and probably just as effective as taking Valtrex.



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169,283 When I was 10 (im a girl),  another girl who was 14 asked me to touch her bare ass while we were under the bed covers.



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169,282 It hurts me that you dont miss me and you dont care :)



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169,281 Look up "oil pulling", it has literally changed my life.
There is a mountain of info of this but you won't see it on the mainstream news too often.



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169,280 I am 34 and have been sick for a long time but none of the doctors can tell me exactly what is wrong and I have seen many of them. The best answer I have gotten was it's "something autoimmune" after one looked at the results of a blood test. My hair is starting to fall out and I have a hard time holding down a job due to my frequent illnesses. I had hope for a short while after I had a consult with a doctor practicing Eastern medicine but then I discovered my insurance does not cover natural medicine. I then looked into taking out a loan against my 401k to pay for it but I cannot. I feel dark and hopeless inside and I keep it from everyone. I have a wonderful family, why bring them down? Though I cannot endure the thought of a life of chronic pain and cascading health. My boy is only 7 and I need to be around for at least the next 11 years and try to set him up for life as much as I can. The thought of suicide comforts me. Not yet though. There is still work to be done here.



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169,279 It disturbs me that my bowels would leak if I committed suicide. I wish there was way to stop it. I'm thinking if I fast for a few days before hand it would help, but probably won't be perfect. There's no way I'm going out wearing a diaper. I don't need that as my last image. I need to talk to a coroner. He has probably seen methods which work. Not sure how he'd take the phone call though. I'd probably get arrested and committed.



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169,278 Husband gone to work, kids off to their first days of school and now it's me time. I don't often get much time to myself because of our crazy schedules. When I do, I meet a stranger from Craigslist and have crazy sex. No one knows or would believe it. I either meet them somewhere and blow them in their car or sometimes, very rarely, I let them fuck me in the garage of our house. I just lean over a bench and let them take me from behind. It makes me feel so free. When it's really busy and I can't get enough time to do it, it drives me crazy thinking about it.



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169,277 I think maybe some people ask the same question over and over because they get some satisfaction from the answer.



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169,276 My girl gone two years. Damn. Thirty years we had. Awesome.   incredible, beautiful life we had together. Listen up folks out there. As a suggestion it is a good idea to fall in love.



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169,275 What I've gone through does not inspire confidence. It inspires paralyses. It bonds us, but it doesn't bring us together. It keeps us apart.

Daddy loves you.

Do what thou wilt.



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169,274 I believe the only thing which can hinder you in life is attachment.  When I no long have a need for something I immediately give it away.  
I love and give and maybe that is why the universe is so generous with me.
It has taken me a lifetime to finally figure out that this is truly the secret to being happy.
And now my secret is yours.



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169,273 im not a surfer



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169,272 I'm free of you.  It's the best gift you ever gave me!



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169,271 Speaking for myself, sex is not painful because I love my husband. Plus there's fore play not just straight sex. You have to learn your partners wants and needs. What turns her on like kissing the back of her neck. Caressing her hair as you kiss her slowly and passionately. Me and my husband keep it interesting and we each know what the other likes, lives, or hate. Lol  

Maybe you had a bad experience, but trust me if a girl is attracted to you then she wants to eventually make love remember that LOVE not sex.
You will know who she is because you will get to know her first and know that she's the one. So how could it be painful? Think about it.

Hope this helps



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169,270 I still think sex is painful and unwanted by women. The fear of her pain won't let me enjoy myself. She is a victim and women don't like sex. I don't know what to think. I can't tell if she's in pain or pleasure and I am remorseful for wanting what is inevitably painful to her - sex is painful to women. I am so sorry for wanting what hurts you. I am not a bad person so I'll love you without my penis. I seriously think this is what girls really want. To love them as "people" and NOT her vagina. If guys didn't try to desperately mount the girl she would be happiest to not have to deal with his penis. If guys only knew how unimportant sex is to women it would crush them. Maybe that's why there are so many guys crushed who gave up already.



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169,269 Good day today. Woke up feeling good. I was feeling little lazy today at work, but tomorrow I'm getting up bright and early and once the kiddies go to school. I have a lot of catching up to do. I slacked so hard at my job and what's crazy is we hired a new accountant and he said I did great job of maintaining the books. Mind you I'm self taught with QuickBooks. No course. Nothing. All that time they said I did a great job even my boss, I was getting high on heroin. Life if crazy and people see what they want to see.

I'm convinced of this and i have to keep that in the front of my mind because I can easily fool people with my wit and charm. I'm a Gemini so you know I have the gift of gab. Lol

One day at a time. Thanks for reading.

36/F



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169,268 Going back to court to re-adjust child support payments just sucks. Why can't I do this without legal representation?!



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169,267 I grew to 5ƌ" at best.  I noticed my hair starting to recede during my final year of high school, and it just kept on disappearing ever since.  During my early childhood I was diagnosed with coeliac disease.  I've also suffered from problems all my life with debilitating motion sickness (it's like a hangover that can last up to three days) - inherited from my father, who had it all his life - so travel is not something readily undertaken.

Do you think I'd want to pass that bundle of genetic goodies onto a kid - especially onto a son who could end up as a balding shortarse scorned by women for aesthetic shortcomings that he can't help?  Hell, no!

(I'm not the person who posted 169260.)

M/62



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169,266 I am tired. I am tired of being a push over and used by other people. I have got to learn to stand up for me and to no longer care about what others have to say about me. I let someone bully me into helping pay a stupid baby shower for someone I barely knew and I let my ex walk all over me so often. I'm done I will no longer be anyone's door mat. I have to speak up for myself and be assertive.



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169,265 Netflix is less than $10 a month, create your own fucking account free loader. if I as a single mother of two can afford to subscribe so can you, and don't call me about it either some people.



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169,264 It took 30 years of living and two nights in jail to learn to flush a toilet the moment your deuce hits the water in order to minimize the odor.  All these years I was siting there letting the room stank up.  I feel like my father should have taught me this when I first started dating.



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169,263 There is nothing better than cumming in a girl's mouth. I love it so much.



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169,262 I was 11 years old the first time I got drunk. My parents threw a New Years Eve party. My brother and I snuck sips out of the liquor bottles.  I've gone downhill since then.



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169,261 During my philandering years in New York City I had it really good. I had no trouble getting women into bed. Seems these days guys are always trying to pester a woman into sex. I don't know what it was, but I never had that problem. I could be walking home from work and I'd suddenly decide I wanted to have sex that night. I'd look around to see who was walking in the same direction as me. In Manhattan everyone works in midtown and walks home to either the upper east side or upper west side. It takes about half an hour. Any woman walking my way was kind of a captive audience for the duration of the walk. So I'd side up to someone and start in with small talk. By half an hour later I'd ask if she'd like to grab a bite to eat. After dinner and a few beers later we'd be at my apartment fucking. Most of these women had a boyfriend. Some of them lived with their boyfriend. Naughty naughty girls. :) Wish I could have seen that interaction when she came home.

"Hi honey, you are late getting back from work."

"Oh, I had to stay late at the office and take care of a few things."

Meanwhile my cum is in her stomach and she just kissed her boyfriend on the lips.

But all in good fun. Sometimes I'd see her again and sometimes I'd even date her for a while. But no problem at all finding a girl to sleep with whenever I wanted, and believe me, I wanted to often. I miss those days.



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169,260 Yes, there is a reason why I never fathered children. I am a 5ƌ" bald asthmatic. Does that sound like genetic information that deserves another generation? There should be laws preventing people like me from procreating.



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169,259 Everytime you have sex with someone you are tied to them energetically for a very looooooong time.  Possibly forever.
So this in other words means that if they happen to think about you then no matter how long it's been you may feel what they are feeling.
Doubt me go ahead but it is the truth.



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169,258 My wife went for a job interview at the library. There was an opening for someone to put books back on the shelves. She had to take a test. They asked her to sort 3 numbers from lowest to highest.  There were something like,

357.54
271.96
477.12

My wife failed the test. She couldn't sort 3 numbers. This proves my point about how mentally lazy she is. I married a woman dumber than a brick.



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169,257 Dating sucks. I take her on a date, she is 50-something. Smells funny with all her various perfumes and sprays. She has men issues because she is a divorcee. She lies on the bed and like a jello pudding with a gash. No thanks. I'll take the 20-something who digs the extra cash. Plus, she loves the no-strings sex as well as I do.



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169,256 Yes, stick with escorts! who wants the same ol same ol opinionated woman over and over?? not meant to be that way.
that can go for woman, also...why the same guy over and over, especially if he's an ass, and gets fat.  just date.  it's FUN.



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169,255 Anyone who describes a process as having a "learning curve" is really just trying to say "Dummies are going to trip over this easy thing so let's pretend it's somewhat difficult to make them not feel so bad".  


Seriously, if someone mentions a learning curve and you can't quite seem to get it, then clearly you're one of the dummies in the room.



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169,254 It is $100 for a call girl to come to my house, bring her massage table, an hour deep tissue massage, a bj and a fuck. She's 4-11, 105 lbs and tightest girl I've ever been with. I work hard and this is my weekly entertainment.

M/59



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169,253 I've been having great conversations with a woman online. She likes me for me. She knows nothing about what I look like. She knows nothing about my salary. She likes talking to me because she finds me "interesting and amusing".  I feel so good about myself. I'm on top of the world. Ladies, it's so easy to make a guy's spirit soar. All my wife ever does is complain. What a missed opportunity for my wife. She makes me miserable and I'm sure I return the favor. I forgot what it feels like to be happy and secure. Changes will be coming....



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169,252 Don't you hate it when you have to take a dump at a friends house and the toilet bowl gets smeary? Gross. You can't leave it like that. Here is the secret to leaving the bowl clean. Before sitting down float a layer of tp on the surface of the water in the bowl. The dump is captured on the tp and flushes cleanly. Use a layer or two, but no more or you might clog the toilet. Now what do you do about the smell is another matter.



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169,251 I feel silly, but; Atticus Finch falling from grace made me extremely sad and angry.

Funny how that goes.



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169,250 My future husband will not have to worry about me becoming fat. I already am. :/



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169,249 I don't want to have a wedding. The more I think about it, the more I realize that I don't want any of it. The money that would go toward a wedding is the least of my worries. I don't want to deal with the planning, the deciding, the tons of people. I don't want to be the center of attention. I don't want to wear a wedding gown.

I want to get married. I want to call him my husband. But I do not want a wedding.



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169,248 My husband complains that I have put on some weight over the 15 years we've been together and it's true, I have.  BUT...I still love him and am kind and thoughtful towards him, we still have sex regularly, I don't nag him about chores or whatever and I look after myself physically.  I  am still attractive and get lots of compliments.  I dress well - not sloppy clothes and trainers.  I get my hair done regularly and so on.  So, when he is complaining about my fat tummy, I just look at him and think 'you don't know how lucky you are - I could be so much worse' but I don't say it as I don't want to get into a fight about it.  I think fighting about weight-gain would be just too shallow and I refuse to do it!! After all, I could moan to him about his weight gain, hair loss and messy habits but I don't. I just think about the good things!  Please wise up, baby, and appreciate what you have.



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169,247 Last summer I took my family on vacation. We went to a great resort with all the bells and whistles. I have been married to my wife for more than twenty years. We average having sex maybe once a week. She knows this is frustrating for me.  Twice a week would be much better.  Three times a week would be a dream come true. So building up to the vacation my wife talks all kinds of sexy encouraging words about our getaway.  As if sex is one of her main goals during our trip.  We even have our own private room away from the kids so we have privacy and space.  I'm sure you can already see where this is going.  We had missionary sex the night we arrived.  Three days later we had super boring sex in the morning.  Two days after that I was bummed and mad.  This whole fucking trip my kids complained and my wife bitched and was mostly cold.  At one point I had just put my clothes on from having a showing and... no shit... she comes over to me and rubs my cock under my jeans and says, "you seem frustrated".  Then gets up and walks away to the kids in the other side of our rental!  I spent thousands of dollars and tons of time planning this trip.  I sacrificed time and money.  My wife barely got my balls to begin emptying before they filled right back up again. From what I see and hear most relationships/marriages are just like mine.  A selfish bitch for a wife with zero intrest in sex.  And I certainly jump through all the hoops of romance, back-rubs, sweet talk, chores, you name it.  Fuck marriage.  Fuck my wife and fuck this life.



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169,246 There was a kid in my town about 10 years ago with bone cancer. It was a sad story to see a youngster in such dire medical circumstances. The town rallied around the boy. Fund raisers were held. Awareness was raised. Everyone pitched in to get this boy well again.

It worked. He had an operation and survived.

This week, that same boy, who is now 20 years old, was arrested for vandalism. He destroyed school property with his friend. He did over $10,000 of damage.

That's quite a way to say thank you...



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169,245 Now I'm just broken and alone.



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169,244 I have a garden in my yard. It is very large. I grow corn, onions, tomatoes, brussel sprouts, carrots, peas, basil, zucchini, sunflowers, apple, pears, peaches and plums.

The plants are 10 times more than I could ever use.

There is no fence around my garden. The animals come and go as they please and eat whatever they want. I have deer, ground hogs, rabbits, chipmunks, raccoons, opossums, beavers, woodchucks, fishers, skunks, moose(!), and weasels.

The neighbors laugh at me. They say I'm dumb for not putting up a fence. They say the animals eat almost everything.

They don't understand. The fruit and vegetables I grow, I could more easily buy them at the grocery store. I only plant things so the animals will come. The animals ARE the garden.



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169,243 My wife has become fat.



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169,242 My oldest daughter left for college this morning. I have to pick myself up for work and pretend I'm not devastated. All those years flew by in an instant. It's easy to say that you'll cherish every moment, which I believe I did, but it all went by so quickly; it's as though there wasn't enough time. Well, I guess I better put on a brave face and get going. It's all for the best.



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169,241 My husband grew up in bars.
His dad was a piece of shit alcoholic, & still is.
He actually left him in a bar when he was four. The bartenders were very nice, & made him Roy Rogers drinks. They phoned his mother because they knew his father well by this point. His mom came and picked him up, understandably angry. Her anger was always futile however, as when she expressed any form of an opinion, her husband made certain to beat it out of her. Taking your kid to a bar I see nothing wrong with, it's forgetting your kid at one that I'll never understand.
My husband still likes bars. As an extrovert he enjoys the dialogue, the openness of it, and maybe just maybe, the nostalgia.



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169,240 I want you so badly that it scares me. It goes way deeper than it should. I want to possess you and be you and be yours. You've highlighted a need in me that I'd buried since childhood. I'm sorry. I wonder how it feels on your end.



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169,239 It is so easy to move on when you are the one breaking up with the other person. It is so easy to move on, knowing that the other person still loves you and cares for you.. But when you know that the other person doesn't give a shit about you.. Its just so hard



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169,238 I hate that people are complaining that the shooter in VA. Is not called a racists because he was black and the victims where White, People the man was crazy its that simple nothing racial about that but the Shooter in Charleston was because he admitted he was a racists and showed it on line, Wow no comparison there, Plus White people quit complaining about the Black Lives Matter movement, you're the majority in this country, you havebit made, Get over it.



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169,237 I shitted on myself at work so I had to throw my underwear away in the bathroom trash can and go commando for the rest of the day at work.



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169,236 My parents arewere nothing but loser-liars.  When I think of the amount of time I wasted with them, it makes me sick.



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169,235 She said, I wish you would stop going away. This with me sitting directly across from her. I feel like all my dominoes are getting knocked down, again.



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169,234 I miss you like hell. I want to go back to you but you honestly just have such a shitty personality that im so miserable around. I need to find someone else



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169,233 Everything was going so well. I had everything set out in front of me. Now it's all gone. I can where they used to be, but they are not actually there. I've lost them, as well as myself.



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169,232 While I agree with you with kids not belonging on  a bar . At least it's better than leaving your kid in the car by themselves .



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169,231 I love people.   I am positive.    I fight the feelings inside me to judge anyone.

I think that kids do not belong at a bar.   Please, it's 10 O'clock.   Way past my bedtime and if you can afford the beer, you can afford a babysitter.  

Babies don't belong in bars at ANY hour.   Even if your wife cheated on you, please don't punish these innocent children.  My G-d, where is this Goddam mother?

Of all the shit that I have pulled.  When I see this shit, I am beside myself.  God Damm you, mister, you failed as a human.

You are no father.



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169,230 I keep fucking up so badly.



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169,229 deleted



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169,228 Being considered pretty sucks. I had female co-workers who preferred not to walk next to me, because I made them look bad. Women think that I'm going to steal their man. As if I want their man. One co-worker had to exit the office and go to a quiet area to talk to his wife when she called. If she heard my voice in the background, she would flip out.

I get entirely unwanted compliments and attention. I've learned after I transferred to a different work site, the men at my previous one bet on who would "get me" first. I'm really tired as being seen as some kind of challenge just because of the way I look.

One day I was at a park fair with my now ex-boyfriend. A vendor walked up to him and asked him if I was his girlfriend. He nodded. The vendor guy said, "Congratulations!" At no point was I a part of this conversation other than being the subject of it. As soon as the guy walked out of ear shot, my ex-boyfriend demanded to know what I did to receive such a compliment. What I did? Nothing. We eventually broke up and things like this were a part of the reasons why.

I give zero fucks about my appearance. I wear no make up. My clothes cover everything in order not to draw attention. It doesn't work.

I still need to figure out a socially acceptable way to make these comments stop.



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169,227 I'm catholic, but I never liked "Christians." They're fake and pretentious. Generally,  I don't like overzealous religious people,  no matter what their religion is. Usually they're troubled.



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169,226 I had a really nice girlfriend in college, sweet, willing and loving. And then one day the girl from the apt next door knocked on my door. She said she wanted to be my girlfriend. She was a lonely incoming freshman. I told her I already had a girlfriend. She said she didn't care. I kissed her on the lips and she let me and kissed me back. I unbuttoned her blouse. She let me. She stood there with her shirt open and her bra on. She was embarrassed. She was a virgin. Had never been with a man. I told her I was busy but to come back the next night, and anytime she came over she better not be wearing a bra. I said, "I mean it. If you are wearing it, dont bother ever coming back." So this shy girl stopped wearing a bra altogether. I am 54 now but I can still remember her firm, stand-up tits. Every time she came over she had no bra on. We would watch tv. I would open her top and play with her tits. My real girl friend nevver knew anything about this. After awhile with the new girl topless I took my cock out. She was really uncomfortable. I told her to take it and stroke it. Soon I was having her suck it. Every time she said she didn't want to do something I told her we didn't have to go out anymore, it was ok, and then she would do it. She was very submissive. By the end of the school year I filling her ass and mouth with cum on a regular basis -- but I never fucked her pussy. As long as I wasn't fucking her pussy I felt I wasn't cheating. I never did fuck her pussy but I must have filled her belly with gallons of sperm. After she moved home for the summer I never saw her again.



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169,225 Donald Trump is presenting the world with the most brilliant piece of performance art ever conceived. I am half expecting him to pull off a rubber mask and reveal himself as Andy Kaufman!



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169,224 One of the common ways that I use to get over a love loss is to say too much, or act out on an impulse. If I were to take a moment to step back and examine the consequences of my actions, then I might make better choices, but then the magic doesn't happen. I have to act like an ass, and then associate that person with humiliation and shame. After the regret, I say to myself, "Self, I'm better then that" Then it becomes really easy to compartmentalize those feelings and associations. Ass + Actions=Shame, (forgetting her). We've all done it, but we deserve a pass. We are both better than that, and better than her. So I guess it's okay to be a narcissistic ass once in a while.



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169,223 Ha, Christians! I had a run in with Christians in college.

In my freshman year there was a Christian girl on my hallway. By Christian, I mean she was devout and most of her personal life was concerned with her relationship with God. There was a bible on her desk and she spoke about Jesus, that sort of thing. She seemed quite nice. She'd stop by my room sometimes and tell me about how she was going to a bible study class or whatever. She often asked if I'd like to come along.

Technically, I was raised Christian, which really meant we went to church on Christmas. That was all. I had no feelings for the topic one way or another.

One afternoon I was coming out of the student center when she was going in. She said she was on her way to bible class and asked if I would come along. I thought what the heck, college is about learning new things. So I went went her.

There were about 30 people in the room. They were quite pleasant. One guy I recognized from my chemistry class. I spoke to him for a bit. Of course all the conversation was about God, but it wasn't pushy or anything. The leader of the group was a grad student named Max. He saw I was new and welcomed me. He pointed me out when the meeting officially started. Everyone said hello. It was fine.

A week later there was a note on my dorm room door from the girl. She reminded me there was another meeting that day. I went. Again I spoke to my chemistry friend and the girl and a little bit with Max.

A few days later I saw the girl in the late night snack bar. I sat with her. No Christian talk. Just school stuff.

Week three, I thought what the heck, I might as well go to the Christain meeting again. The girl was very sweet and sincere. My chemistry friend was there. And Max seemed like a good fellow. I kind of liked the camaraderie.

But talk about getting kicked in the head...

At the start of the session, Max said he had something serious to discuss with the group. He said one of the people in the room was a fake, a troublemaker. One person was only here because he wanted to have pre-marital sex with a woman in the group. He was stalking her and pressuring her. He said the person is unwelcome at this gathering and should leave.

I thought wow, someone's in trouble. It sounded horrible. Some guy was stalking a girl? That isn't right. I wondered who it was.

Max reiterated that the person should leave immediately and not come back..... Max was staring right at me.  So was everyone else in the room.

Like what the hell. They wanted me to leave? They thought I was stalking a girl? What girl? I only knew one girl in the room. Huh? They thought I was stalking her? She was the one who asked me to come to these meetings. Yes, I bumped into her in the snack bar, but that was totally a coincidence.

But do you know what it's like to be surrounded by 30 people and have them stare at you? I was so embarrassed and without saying a word I left.

That's my experience with uber Christians. I swear, I was doing nothing wrong. I thought they were nice. I came to a few of their meetings. I thought that was the point. I thought they wanted people to come to their meetings. Boy was I wrong.

All this happened about 15 years ago. One fallout, I totally stopped going to church on Christmas. No way will I ever go to church again.



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169,222 My favorite number is 17. It's always been my favorite number. But I've long since forgotten why.



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169,221 I picture gears and valves in a guy's balls. My job is to get the gears to turn a certain way so sperm will come out instead of urine. Sometimes I pretend just before a guy erupts that I can hear the gears churning. I imagine the sounds in the Transformer movie. Click, click, grind, thunk,  and bingo, out comes the sperm. I'm very good at making the mechanics work they way they should.



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169,220 I spent a very nice day with the husbands and kids at the aquarium.

It may not seem like much, but I didn't have to worry about getting straight (sniffing heroin) and making sure I had enough which would require for me to sneak out the house to meet my dealer. By the time I get back its already the afternoon and hang the day done. Not today though, i was up early. Didn't wake up sick, but still took my medication.

It's an awesome feeling to wake up good. I'm even getting my appetite back! As they say baby steps.

36/F



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169,219 People should be cautious of any person who claims to be a Christian and spends much of their existence being hateful and judgmental and insulting and arrogant and boastful and is anyone in the news coming to mind as I am listing those traits -



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169,218 Donald Trump thinks he will become the next president of the USA. It won't happen but I'm sure he will be get the republican nominee if he doesn't change his mind at the last minute and decides to run as an independed . In a way I'm glad he is going strong even though I cannot stand him , he should stay on the race just for comical relief and see who is his next victim of his stupid and arrogant comments. I'm surprise he hasn't insult my dogs yet.



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169,217 Relationship pro tip:

Ladies, when your man is upset because of your behavior toward him, you have no right or authority to lecture him on why he has no right to feel the way he does or be upset with you.

When we, as men, are attacked *we feel attacked.* Cause and effect. Your behavior caused him to be hurt. Beating him down further to reassure yourself that you weren't wrong, and that your behavior was warranted, only makes the problem worse.

How would you feel if he acted that way toward you, and then belittled you by mansplaining that your silly girl feels were all imaginary?

Apologize for your behavior and move on. It's not that hard.



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169,216 for the past week I have been so melancholic and depressed because you left me... but now I feel nothing. There is only a lingering feeling of nostalgia, for once my heart was full of love and joy.
Now it is cold.. I feel nothing.
It is a distant memory, I don't remember how love feels like..



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169,215 I'm tired of people.



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169,214 It makes me disgusted beyond belief that we have a movement for black lives matter that doesn't give a flying fuck when a black person kills a white or Hispanic person. That is just as fucking racist as when someone targets someone for being black! It may be considered politically incorrect nowadays but I will not stop calling out racist black people. I hope other people see this and do the same thing. If they want an end to white racism, then we want an end to black racism!



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169,213 Donald Trump will be the next Presidents of the USA. That's amazing to me. Someone so brash with so much power. What if he gets mad and launches a nuke?



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169,212 I am no one to anyone but my husband.   My "friends" don't care about me.  My family doesn't care about me.  My coworkers don't care about me.  If I suddenly stopped reaching out to all of them, I don't think they would even notice.

If things ever go bad between me and him... I will be left all alone, and I don't know how I will ever be able to handle that.  His love is the only thing that makes me feel happy and appreciated.  

Sometimes it feels like getting to love him and being loved by him are my only purposes in life.

Please, God, don't ever take that away from me.



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169,211 Matt,
Ditching me after I bought you drinks and dinner, to go talk to you ex whom we ran into, instead of being gracious and inviting me along since you were ALREADY with me, is exactly what it feels like to be a Black Woman in the USA. After we work hard and provide deadbeat men and the kids whom they won't help raise with shelter, food and love, they ditch us like trash for the first other thing that comes along.
The men in Straight outta compton were like that and apparently, you just did the same thing as a White guy



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169,210 I threw away the last memory I had of you tonight. I might regret it, but right now, it feels good. I'm sorry things didn't work out.



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169,209 My husband and I just made love for the 3rd time today.  Or was it the 4th?  I've already lost count.



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169,208 Why does it have to feel so good?



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169,207 Maybe it's better if I just disappeared. It's not like you care about me any ways.



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169,206 My wife is so weird. She refuses to let me come in her mouth because she's fearful she'll get the HIV virus.

Like what?  I don't have the HIV virus. We've been married for 15 years plus. But she thinks if ever I did get the virus, oral sex will spread it to her.

Meanwhile, she let's me come in her pussy and ass. These locations are not a problem for her. Just her mouth.

I told you she's weird.



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169,205 I always feel having sex with a woman is taking advantage of her in a bad way. Like she's a victim and and is potentially being traumatized or I'm somehow recreating a trauma she might have had. I don't imagine she's in pleasure. It's a lot easier to imagine she's in pain or indifference. I imagine she's putting up with it and that she wants it over as soon as possible before she gets sore. Then I go from causing psychological pain to physical pain. I start hurting her. No wonder she wants it over as soon as possible. She's knows the pain will start at any second.  The inevitable conclusion is that I'm a horrible person for wanting sex. I'm a horrible person for having a sex drive. For having a penis. It's impossible for me to imagine a woman wanting sex for pleasure without feeling like a victim. Like they're being stabbed by this hard merciless penis that won't quit until it selfishly comes whenever it wants. Then what's in it for her? it's all of a sudden over at his determination. It's over when HE'S done. It's NEVER over when she's done - when even is that? When is a woman "done"? They usually just lay there and wait for him to get the hell off so he can get the hell off. There's no benefit to sex for women. One way or another women can not help but feeling used and degraded by being tricked into sex by a guy. This trickery is what holds marriages together. But then it's more like the Stockholm Syndrome where she's developed a twisted logic of sympathy for her captor. Such is love. Love is a tragedy. I'll never understand why women want sex.



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169,204 I have the most gifted amazing compassionate adorable son who I nearly lost to heroin.  More than once.
He is a walking talking miracle and now that he is happy and healthy and never looking back every single day to me is the best day of my life.   He is not the same man he was, he is so much better.   Please do not worry about what people would think of you when you reach out for help.   Anyone who looks down upon you doesn't know the meaning of love so pay them no mind.  It's a big world full of people who actually give a shit and want nothing more than for you to survive and thrive.  
Including me.  You can do it.  If you slide, get back up and start again.  If you have to take a break from the world, the world will spin without you, stuff will get done.    Only you can save you.
Besides, people who don't screw up once and awhile are boring.



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169,203 Oh Andrew, why?  Suicide just fucks with other's souls.



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169,202 Thank you so much for the positive messages. It brought tears to my eyes because at least someone out there in the world is rooting for me.
I'm tired of being the one who always gives good advice and is always trying to save people.  
I need advise and saving and if it means coming here then so be it. Baby steps.

36/F



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169,201 Michele.  I miss you.

007



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169,200 If I ever cheat on my husband ,it will be with a young and good looking guy not some 50 plus guy. So you can rest at peace , your husband is not wanted or desired by me.



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