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170,999 I don't have a soulmate, because I don't have a soul.



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170,998 You guys definitely use people.  I'll continue to hang out and play games with you.  I may or may not help out a little bit.  But I have no plans to get very close to you guys.  I know the game you play.  I was raised on it, and so were you.

I even played it right back on you.  I'm proud of that moment.



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170,997 I thought about it and made a little list... I have jacked off at 5 of the 8 places I've worked at.

The first place, I was the IT guy at a nonprofit.  Everybody was clueless about computers, so I would have multiple computers in my office downloading porn through the company's high speed internet line.  This was 2002 when high speed internet was really expensive and only found in businesses.  Employees would complain that the system was slow, and I'd just shrug my shoulders and tell them that sometimes it just got slow, you know?  Then I'd get horny from watching porn all day.  The bathrooms were single seaters and perfect for a midday knuckle shuffle.

The second place, I was in an office building, but we were the only company on the floor at the time.  I was also the only guy in the company.  The entire spacious bathroom was for me to go into and do whatever the fuck I wanted.  It was my personal masturbatorium, at least until the guys in the companies on the other floors found out that it was empty all the time.  The it became the place they went into for peace and quiet when they needed to take fucking nasty dumps.  After about 18 months, the bathroom smelled like diarrhea most of the time.

The third place I only jacked off once at, but it was a good one.  I had a private office with a door and a huge window, but at the window was a tiny gap that went into my boss' office.  I was sexting a woman, got horny, closed and locked the door, stood at my desk and jacked a creamy one all over my keyboard.

The fourth place... I think I jacked it at, but I don't remember.  I was only there a few months.  I jerk it so much that I assume I did it there, too.

The fifth place was a government job.  Went in a few times into the bathroom and whipped it out and hammered away.  I'd stop when someone else came in, and I'd flush the toilet and pretend like I was having issues.  When the guy left, I blow my load into the toilet.

That last job is where I stopped jerking off at work.  I just stopped after the first year there.  Haven't done it at work since.



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170,996 I keep a mental record of where cops live in my area.

just
in
case



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170,995 OK so there's this crazy guy who happen to be a stalker and claims to be great hacker . I always felt suspicious that it was him behind all the snooping and I was right . I have even proof he is behind . So azzhole it's time to quit pretending or btw if you are going to critiqued me for things I do in my home you should look at yourself first . I do as I pleased after all is my house you wouldn't like if some one went into your home and tell you what to do.  You are ugly as hell and can you please get dressed more decent so you won't look like some homeless guy who still lives at home with his mom.



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170,994 Never, I repeat never trust cops. Let's just say I know "first hand" what I'm saying. I will leave it at that.



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170,993 I would love to post a picture of my cock for everyone to admire



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170,992 I know the details of a particular police shooting. It disgusts me. The police reported they shot a man in his driveway. But that's not true. They shot a man in the kitchen of his home. He was a good man, a kind man. No criminal history. Just an upper middle class man who was simply having an argument with his wife. She didn't even call the police. Someone else not even on the property called the police.

But it wouldn't play too well in the media if the public thought they could be shot inside their own home. So somehow the story came out in the newspapers that the man was shot in his driveway.... you know... like sometimes it's hard to see a large pool of wet red blood in the middle of the white kitchen floor....



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170,991 I miss the way you used to fuck me...all cave man and animalistic

I don't miss your cave man table manners though, may I never dine again with a man who picks his teeth at a restaurant table with a knife or worse yet blows his nose into a cloth napkin

Have to think of the pluses and minuses, we all have them
Thinking you're "all that"...yeah, a minus

I have seriously wondered at times if you have Aspergers



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170,990 My partner isn't very affectionate and it's destroying our relationship.



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170,989 I kinda wish I dumped you the other day. You're whiny and useless



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170,988 I don't think that killing yourself is always a bad thing. If you're really that unhappy, is it not better to put yourself out of your misery?



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170,987 I hate squirrels! They are nothing but fuzzy tailed tree rats. In fact, if you shave a squirrel and shave a rat they look almost identical. I hate squirrels!



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170,986 I've fallen in love with a man 15 years my senior who lives halfway across the country. We're both married and can never be together, but he writes me poetry and showers me love and affection like I've never known. And it's become so that, even after only a month of knowing him, I can't imagine my life without him in it. I've never felt so loved. He makes me feel so valued. He gives me his time. Lots of it. I give him all this in return, and still I cannot seem to give him as much as he gives me. I feel so fortunate to have been loved like this.



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170,985 I don't want to go anymore...I guess I should at least show up and be a good "friend" - whatever that means.



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170,984 I haven't fucked a guy who was older than me since I was 17, holy shit.
My boyfriend is a year younger than me, but I've had sex with a 29 year old and a 31 year old.
I mean, he is good in bed. I didn't have orgasms till I met him.
Just have been feeling really weird without that older man dick in me. *long sigh*
18F



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170,983 I am trying not to relive past mistakes by rushing into never never land searching for something that is not there. Crazy pushes on me.



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170,982 I'm boring...and I like it that way.



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170,981 Everyone in my wife's family is defective. Amazin'. It's in their DNA. Not a physical defect, but an emotional one.



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170,980 My son is in 7th grade. His science teacher put him on a team with 3 other students. Together they had to conduct a science experiment and write a lab report. Team building and all that.

My son's a really good student. He loves science. He always puts in a huge effort. This lab was no exception. He wrote up his section of the report. The other students did not. They put in no effort even though my son repeatedly encouraged them to help out. This annoyed my son. He didn't want to fail because other people didn't put in an effort.

He took matters into his own hands. He wrote up the sections the three other students were supposed to do. He put everyone's name on it.

A week later the teacher handed back the lab report.  The three other students received 100. Of course they did because my son always tries to do good work.

But my son received a 90. Like what? The teacher told him the lab was not just about science, it was about team building.  The teacher recognized my son did all the work. But in so doing, he skipped over the team building experience. So she took off points.

This is how common core education in America works. Mark down the student who does all the work. Give 100 to students who did nothing.

My son tells me he now hates science.  Way to go America!



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170,979 I always light scented candles before people come over because my husband is a smelly poo and the house stinks like BO.



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170,978 It's not just women who have BPD.  I was engaged to a fellow who had it.  

He couldn't be alone for even one SECOND; always surrounded himself with the sleaziest users, grifters, and white trash he could find.  He'd accuse me of cheating on him with any man I spoke to, even if I chatted with the bag boy at the supermarket about the weather for a minute.  I was allowed NO male friends, and even my relationships with my family were suspect.  He claimed he was going to have me followed by private detectives to make sure that I "behaved myself."

Not only that, but he couldn't leave me alone for even one day, even if it was during midterms or finals week in college, or when I had play rehearsals.  He'd call me up FRANTICALLY whining about WHY was I ignoring him?!  Then when I started trying to break it off, the suicide threats started.  I even found out he'd hacked into my email trying to find out who "the other man" could be.

Then getting rid of him was impossible because he clung like a remora.  I had to go to NO CONTACT with him and most of our mutual friends.  It's now EIGHTEEN YEARS LATER, and I have been in a happy relationship for 16 years, married for 11 of them, and word STILL gets back to me from various people about how he's telling everybody I was an evil bitch who slept around on him.  This is even though I never actually did so, and he has no proof, not even the name of a potential guy.

Oh, and he hates my husband and is sure that he's some kind of criminal.

Phew!  Am I glad that he went broke and had to move back in with his parents, 2500 miles away.  That guy was certifiably NUTS.



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170,977 I don't understand how I can go from being on top of the world one day and being in the dumps the next.  This goes on all the time, up and down, up and down.  Part of it has to do with making some major life changes, which I'm laying the groundwork. But some of it requires changing things...that I can't figure out.  Just like some people can look at a car engine and know what's wrong, while the rest of us have no idea what to do.  But I've seen Wizard of Oz enough to know these changes have to come from within. Why can't I see it.

Maybe this is what being in your 40s is supposed to be like, I often I feel like I'm planning for my demise.



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170,976 I read from time to time about spouses who may or may not have Borderline Personality Disorder. I feel like it's often carelessly used to describe bad behavior. A lot of times, these spouse (or presumed sufferers of BPD) are female. They often feel victimized by a so called "abuser" and that said abuser is incapable of ever changing. Well, here is what I know. I lived with someone who undoubtedly had BPD. This person put me and my family through hell, until it got to the point we couldn't take it anymore, and left. She went running around telling anyone who cared or listened that I was abusive. Meanwhile, I went on with my life and started a new relationship that isn't completely bereft of drama, but is a world apart from the old relationship in terms of anything that might register as abusive. I spent so much time living with a cloud over my head that I had no idea that two people could have a mutually caring/loving existence-I just didn't even no what that would look like. So, the last point I'd make is that people do change. I'm thinking primarily about sufferers of BPD, because it is thought that they tend to mellow out over time. Good to know. I'm happy for them, but in my particular case, I suffered too while some random person wreaked havoc and chaos for a period in my life, which I now consider completely wasted time. Maybe she changed? Who knows, who cares. I just wish I had read about this sooner, or had my eyes wide open, and maybe it was just ignorance, there is always that. I am thankful though that life gets easier as I get older.



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170,975 Seeing your face makes it all better.



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170,974 Its that day where some Military...especially young...take advantage of people and want everyone to kiss their asses.



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170,973 In my freshman year of college I was so immature. I acted like such a junior high school kid, instead of a college adult. The more mature students on my freshman hall totally ignored me and wrote me off. It was many years ago but I still feel like a buffoon. I'd like to apologize to all of them, especially my roommate. He's done very well in life.  He probably looks back at his college experience and loved it, except for his freshman year roommate.



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170,972 I am no longer powerless over alcohol!

Thank you, Dr. Sinclair and The Sinclair Method.
Thank you, Dr. Eskapa for writing "The Cure for Alcoholism"
Thank you, Claudia Christian for producing the documentary, "One Little Pill".



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170,971 I never talk bad about you not because I'm stupid or scare of you but I do it out of companion it must be hard living with your mom and being a single mother to a daughter with special needs . So you can go head and keep talking all the crap and let your mom keep raising your daughter honey . Just remember that I pity you and I hope one day you grow up .



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170,970 I've had a longtime habit of picking my nose, but recently had an experience arising from it that I should warn other nose-pickers about.

One night, using a cotton ball, I engaged in some deep sweeping out of crusties in various stages of formation from my right nostril.  When I got out of bed the following morning, I felt dizzy and nauseous, with muffled hearing in my right ear.  The sensation of nausea was so unpleasant that I could do no more than sit still in a chair all day.  If I hadn't already rolled the bedcovers down, I would've gone straight back to bed.

This persisted on and off for days - not so much nausea, but the muffled hearing in my right ear.  I would think the problem had gone away, and then it would recur.  After about two weeks, I saw a doctor about it.  One of the questions he asked me was whether I had had any cold or sniffles before it.  In fact, I had (slightly).  That's probably why I had been taking enthusiastic measures to sweep out my right nostril (but I was too ashamed to mention that bit to the doctor).

After finding that there was no fluid buildup in my inner ear, the doctor was confident that the problem was viral in origin, not bacterial, and diagnosed labyrinthitis.  The viral infection interferes with the transmission of nerve signals from your ear; hence, interference with your hearing or sense of balance.  Because it's viral and not bacterial, they can't give you something like an antibiotic to help you along.  The only treatment is to be patient and let your body fight it.  The doctor advised me that I could expect the symptoms to occur on and off for a few more weeks, and that's just what happened with me.  Fortunately, labyrinthitis doesn't usually result in permanent damage.

If you have an infection in your nasal passages, it's possible for it to travel up the eustachian tube to your inner ear.  Deep down, I think I caused that problem for myself by messing my nasal membranes around enough on this occasion that I facilitated the entry of bacteria or viruses into my body.  So, all you nose-pickers out there, be aware that it's not just a matter of aesthetics or customary manners.  Going too far with nose-picking can actually cause a medical problem.



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170,969 I've prayed on it and prayed on it. I still can't stop picking my nose.



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170,968 It only happens once in a lifetime turning 60 years of age. For the first time in my life the thought occurs to me- have I been here on earth too long or not long enough?

M/60



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170,967 Lol no one is interested in you anyways that's why you don't even get a simple hello 😆 I'm too picky and you wouldn't even be considered an acquaintance . Quit being such as sore loser and quit trying to interfere in my life btw not that it should matter you look like freaking albino gorilla ,yuck  definitely not my type.



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170,966 I've never told you how much your excessive nose picking in front of me turned me off...

Don't suppose it matters now
Enjoy your boogers



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170,965 Just wondering, Sweets...
So how do you like me now?

I liked it when you said before
That I had "gotten under your skin"
And if I am still right now, I know you'd be loathe to admit it~

It is cold here though
So cold
And I do need a place to burrow...
Formerly, Princess



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170,964 Fuck you Apple. I hate your arrogance.



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170,963 I'm so happy to say that I made peace with my ex. We share a kid together. We had our moments where we hated each other to the point of physical sickness. Now we are really close, having mended fences. I had a dream this morning that we were young again, and she was dating someone new, and it made me so jealous and sad. I was relieved it was just a dream. I'm not interested in her that way, plus I'm with someone new. She is a great mom and I'm thankful that we can be friends and it isn't complicated. It makes all the other bullshit I experienced along the way with others seem like a joke. I prefer happy endings.



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170,962 About 20 years ago I bought this really cool desk lamp. With the lamp I bought a spare bulb. 13 years ago I dropped the lamp when I moved and it broke. I threw it out. I still have the spare bulb though. It cost me $30. I can't throw it away. Even though it is designed only to fit the lamp I no longer have. I have moved twice again in the last 13 years. Each time I pack up the bulb and carefully bring it to the new place. I will probably keep moving this bulb with me until I die. Then my kids will throw away all my stuff, including the bulb, and not think twice about it. I'm a foolish person. I know that. But I paid $30 for that damn bulb. You understand right?



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170,961 I used to be so horny I would masturbate at work frequently. Today, for the first time in 8 years, I masturbated at work. Guess my husband doesn't fulfill my horny girl needs these days.

PS I try to get action from him every night...not every boy wants sex all the time like they say they do...boo :(



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170,960 Most companies find excuses to fire old people not because age but for money. When you been working longer in the company or older you most likely have more experience and knows how negotiate a better salary in other words you cost the company more money when they can get rid of you or make you retire early and replace you with two or maybe new young workers who will start with a low salary and most likely will settle since they don't have the experience  and it's getting harder to find a job after graduating from school.



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170,959 If a genie ever granted me three wishes, i know i would use one wish to punch Jan from those Toyota commercials in her ugly fucking face. What an annoying bitch! (Maybe i should turn off the TV and get some air).



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170,958 Do you ever get so mad that you just freeze. You just stop moving. Because you know if you move you're going to break something & then instantly regret breaking it?
I do.



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170,957 When I was 25 I was promoted to be the head of my small computer programming department. My boss was a woman about 40. One of the first things she wanted me to do was fire this one fellow. He was 48. She said he was too old and he had to go.  

In my head I strongly disagreed. Yes he was 48, but he was a very good programmer. I learned a lot from him. She just wanted to fire him because of his age.  Seemed dumb to me.

You know what I did? I fired him. This was my first promotion. I wasn't going to mess it up. My boss told me to fire him so I did. I always felt bad about it.

Now I'm 54. Guess what? No one will hire me. In the computer field everyone is under 30. They don't want an old geezer like me around.

This is karma biting me in the ass. I had my chance to stop age discrimination all those years ago. I let it slip through my fingers. Now I'm the one being discriminated against. I hate it, but I guess it's what I deserve.

The fellow I fired, I think his name was Mark. So sorry Mark. I blew it.



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170,956 I'm coughing today. Therefore I must have throat cancer.

(It's very complicated being me.)



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170,955 I have never met Kalindra Chan. She is TG and beautiful.  Very sexy.

M/59



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170,954 Everyone has a unique and interesting story. That's the secret.



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170,953 If a woman DOESN'T dye her gray hair, I think she has no self esteem.

If a man DOES dye his gray hair, I think he's vain.



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170,952 The only people I see who give a shit about the red cups at Starbucks are the people who think others are making a stink about the red cups.  Ha ha, jokes on you.  We don't give a fuck.  You are stuck in a circle jerk of politically correct, yet totally ridiculous bashing.



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170,951 I wish you never shared your "scandalous" information.
If you hadn't we would still be in each others lives.
It been two months and I still cry twice a day over not being able to talk with you. I don't have a photographic memory and have limited memories of our conversations, however I remember clearly out time together...



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170,950 To the naked in New York lady... You did the boy a great service and have provided him with lots and lots of sexual fodder.



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170,949 I am so glad I saw that picture as it has saved me wasting 50 quid. I am done with him and I really really mean it. I have no contact and all I have to do is disconnect or switch off because thankfully he is not in my real life



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170,948 Ten years ago I didn't care when I died.  I accepted that I would one day, so in the broad scheme of things, what's the difference between dying today and dying 50 years from now?  If there's a God, I'm out of this lousy world and into a better place, and if there's no God, it doesn't make a difference.  Just darkness.  Not even darkness, actually.

Then I had my kids.  Now I cannot die until they're in their 40s.  

Kids fuck everything up.



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170,947 I'm drinking from the well at journey's end. Peace my friends.



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170,946 I have a friend whose last name is Blood. None of my business, but if my name was Blood, I'd change it. How can you go around being called Mrs. Blood?? Eww.



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170,945 One of my most embarrassing moments. It was a few summers ago. I was in New York for work purposes and I decided to spend the weekend at the apartment of my college roommate. She and I shared a room both junior and senior year. We were very close. It's hard tho when adulthood sets in. Anywho, I went to see her on the Saturday. She's married to a wonderful man (as am I!) and they have a son in high school. That night she had me stay in her son's room. He had to sleep on the couch in the living room. Next morning early, I woke up to the sound of some rustling. He had come into his bedroom to get clothes from his closet. This scenario didn't occur to me the night before. It was summer. In New York. It was hot. It was sticky. I was sleeping naked. When he came into the room, I was spread out on the bed bare as could be. It took me like 10 seconds to wake up and realize what was happening. I quickly pulled the sheet over me, but by then it was too late. He had seen the goods. We never spoke about it and I never told his mom. But this is who I am I guess, invite me to your house and I'll expose myself to your teenage son. lol.



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170,944 As a kid I was afraid of everything.

As an adult I am fearless.

Maybe these two things are related. I lived through my childhood fears. I hated it, but I survived. Maybe I learned I can beat fear, that fear's bark is worse than it's bite. So as an adult, eh, I fear nothing.



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170,943 That people actually think that Starbucks is waging a war on Christmas is fucking hilarious, especially because being so butthurt has elevated the red cup to an instant icon. Great job, whackos. I will be purchasing many more Starbucks drinks going forward.



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170,942 I wish I would contract a fatal disease or some kind of cancer. That way I could die and no one would think it would be in my control.

I want to give up, I just can't do it by being obvious.

Pretty fucked up right? Millions of people that have cancer wish they didn't. And I'm hoping it happens to me.



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170,941 My neighbor had an operation to remove a hemorrhoid. He told his wife to not tell a soul about it. She promptly ignored his request and told everyone. Nothing is a secret in suburbia.  Some people just think there are secrets.



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170,940 The longer you stay with an abuser the more you abuse yourself.  
Get out.  They never ever never ever never change.  
You are worth loving the right way.



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170,939 He is an abusive asshole..... the secret I hate myself more than him for still being here



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170,938 Being a Fireman is such a non dangerous job, and very uneventful, and yet all the women want to bang them.  They are some of the biggest players out there, and it seems ok with the women.



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170,937 Don't get carried away.  Charles Whitman, Lee Harvey Oswald, and James Earl Ray were veterans too.



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170,936 When I get divorced, which I know will happen once my kids are grown, I'd gladly give my wife everything if she'd legally allow me to beat the shit out of her for 5 minutes. It's a pretty good deal. Five minutes of me kicking her in the teeth and punching her in the throat in exchange for about $1 million. The money would easily cover her medical bills.



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170,935 I know my ex wife wants to get remarried but she won't because she'd lose the alimony payments. This kills her. She's always looking at the money. The guy she wants to marry is older and richer. He could croak at any minute and she'd get nothing. I'm sure she's sitting there calculating the odds. I try to help her along by paying the alimony late. If it becomes enough of a headache, she'll give up on me and marry that sucker. She's a cunt. She uses as many people as possible.



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170,934 My biggest fear is that you look at other women and think "I wish my girlfriend looked like that."



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170,933 There's a highway near where I live. There is no center divider. Cars in both directions travel at 60 mph. This means they pass each other at 120 mph while only a foot apart. Scariest thing I've ever seen. It has happened numerous times that a driver was distracted by a cell phone or something, and veered one foot off course, killing the oncoming driver.

How the hell could this highway be allowed? Where's the common sense? I smell some political cronyism somewhere and people are dying because of it.



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170,932 I believed dead is not the end for us and our love ones who pass on this life still with us . Two weeks before I found out the my grandmother has pass I had a dream about her  she came to visit me and tell me how much she love me and she will always look up for me . In my dream I knew she was dead already but I wasn't sad or scare that day I woke up to the smell of the perfume she always used to wear my whole room smell like it . My aunt got a phone call the next day telling her that grand ma pass the night before. Even I feel sad and I miss her so much , I'm happy she came to say goodbye to me even if it was just a dream .  Sometimes when I'm having a hard time or things aren't going well I dream of her we have conversations and she always tells me I 'll be ok and not to worry she will always be beside me protecting me.



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170,931 A man with his sleeves rolled up and messy hair. Yum.



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170,930 My wife's big mouth sister is trying to have a kid. There were issues. They went to a fertility place. She tells how her husband had to jack off in a little room while the doctor and nurse waited outside the door.

I dont care how bad someone wants a kid. You need to do it with more dignity. You'd never get me to jack off while people waited outside the door. Have some pride man! Or at least get your wife to shut the fuck up about it.



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170,929 I love you, but only as a friend now--as it always should've been.



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170,928 I really dislike how awful people can be as an adult.



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170,927 I play games online and I meet people from all over and develop friendships with them. Guys and girls. It's fun and much better than dealing with people in real life, but I hate the fact that I develop crushes on some of the guys. This has happened a few times now and it drives me nuts. I am married and there is no chance that I will meet these guys, but I find myself looking forward to gaming/talking to them daily. It seems so stupid and pointless. There is a guy right now that is way younger than me, but I keep thinking about his voice and when he doesn't come onto the game I am sad. So stupid!!



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170,926 It became obvious from events during the final two weeks of my mother's life that she would soon be no longer for this world.  That phone call that I was dreading came on a Friday morning just ten minutes before I would have walked out my door to go to work.  She had been taken by ambulance to hospital overnight and was on life support in a condition that would be absolutely unsurvivable once life support was turned off.

Don't feel bad thinking that you would like the waiting for the soon-to-be inevitable to be over.  Think of it as a release from a life that has ceased to be joyful to live.



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170,925 I have to be drugged to sleep



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170,924 I'm waiting for a phone call telling me my mother died. It will be coming sometime in the next few months. Whenever the phone rings I cringe a little. I look at the caller ID to see it's not anyone in my family. Good. Or bad really because I want the waiting to be over. A few times I could see it was a telemarketer. I never answer when it's a telemarketer. But I have been answering recently because I think I'm glad it's not a family member. Strange isn't it, I purposely talk to a telemarketer because it's no one I know.



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170,923 thank you for seeing me
you woke me up



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170,922 I heard this story only a couple years ago but it is true.  My dad was uncircumcised.  Because he kept having issues with infections and other things he had to get circumcised when he was in his late twenties.

I winced when I heard this and thank god every day I was circumcised when I was born.



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170,921 Tonight I enjoyed myself without you
I still miss you, baby
But we are not to be

Funny now
How you seem to be avoiding me

You'd be so much more attractive
If you could leave that ego by the door
That's all besides the point
We're not together anymore

May I be one of the ones that affect you
In your world of rotation
"Player gotta play"...Right?
Glad to be a dark horse
And play you back
While I genuinely enjoy my damn self
Checkmate, darlin'



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170,920 When I was 12 I had a paper route. I delivered to mostly houses, but one of my customers was an car repair garage. On Thursdays when I had to collect the weekly money, I'd get to go inside the messy work area. On one wall there were pictures of naked ladies. This was the highlight of my week. Even today when I take my car in to be repaired, I look around the mechanics shop hoping to see a few pictures.



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170,919 I try to never do anything bad. I've upset many people in life. They are waiting for me to mess up so they can pounce. I won't give them the satisfaction.



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170,918 I think women look great with their clothes off. Even if they are "curvy".  Curvy is so sexy.

On the other hand, most every man looks awful with his clothes off. Curvy men are not appealing. They look fat and unhealthy.

-- Signed, an ugly curvy man, married to a beautiful curvy woman



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170,917 He's too clingy. This isn't going to work. I knew he would up the hurt one. I feel like such a bitch.



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170,916 The only thing that is constant is change.



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170,915 I can feel myself slowly recover.
I have never been so thankful for everything I have.

The hell I've experienced in the past 4 months gives me new meaning to that feely-good saying "be kind to strangers. They are all going through a battle that you know nothing about."

That was me for the past 4 months, and still on my bad days.
When I held my newborn at a local coffee shop and handed her over to her dad so I could go to the restroom I overheard the whispers "well, she is just so tiny."
Or the wife of my husband's co worker who told me "wow, you lost the baby weight so fast! That's amazing."

Yeah, because I am sick.

What these people don't know are the nights I didn't sleep. The exhaustion. The paranoid delusions. The whole body trembles and shakes, the inability to read simple things & the overwhelming anxiety.
Or the fact that I was 99% convinced I had actually already died and was a ghost in my own home haunting my family because I couldn't let them go. I couldn't move on because I loved them so dearly.

The hallucination continued into the next day.

I quickly saw a dr and was placed on medication.
I once again enjoy the taste of food, but those thoughts scare me.
The places my mind have shown me it can take me & the possibility that it could take me those places again terrify me.
Trying to kill myself scared me.
I could have left behind so much.
So if you're going through a hard time, and think death is the way out, just remember that everything is temporary.
That the Stars keep going into infinity and you are not alone in your suffering.
It helped me.



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170,914 I want you here, by my side.
In my bed, between my thighs.
Whispering I love you.



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170,913 I don't know if my apathy and laziness is the depression or just a fault in my personality. But I've had it for so long how could I possibly make a distinction? Is it a part of me or am I just trash with a pathetic aversion to labor?

Mental illness snakes into you and holds you under, tells you that you're to blame. This guilt and shame is overwhelming. How am I to function like a normal person? How will I keep myself above water?
I'm so useless.



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170,912 Foreclosure doesn't mean anything in my neighborhood , as a matter of fact I believed my condo was the only one that was reposed by the bank thats why we bought at the time the average price was 230,00 for the same model as mine . There were a lot bidders but since we decided not to negotiated and put down a large of money down the bank sold us to us. Until  this day condo's still selling about the same price of a little more is quite a desirable neighborhood since we have the best school district in our city , the park, library ,pool and fire department are within walking distance and taxes keeps going up . In other words I doubt that a few foreclosure will deprecated the value of the houses around me.



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170,911 I have a nasty infection under my foreskin. wtf?



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170,910 While you listen for the other shoe dropping an anvil is going to fall on your head.  This is my fear.



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170,909 I like you way more than I should in the small amount of time we've spent together.  Everything with you just feels so easy and natural.  I feel like I've known you for a long time.  Like when we met, it wasn't a meeting, it felt like a reunion.

Is that what a soulmate is?  



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170,908 I try to do the crossword puzzle in the newspaper each day without writing anything down. I try to keep all the answers in my head. It makes the puzzle infinitely more challenging. Then when I have it all, I quickly write in all the answers in about two minutes.

It's funny, for the first part of this self imposed mind game, people will look over my shoulder and see I haven't written anything even though I've been staring at the puzzle for 30 minutes. They assume I'm an idiot.

But anyone looking as I instantly write down all the answers thinks I'm a genius.

Mostly what I am is a foolish guy with too much time on my hands.

The fact that



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170,907 Years ago my boyfriend at the time wanted to have sex but I was on my period & I didn't know if he thought it was gross. He answered me by taking my tampon out for me & just throwing it on his floor.
Completely gross & almost creepy, but damn that was so fucking hot.

Even more gross side note tho, his dog ate that tampon while we were having sex.



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170,906 Half of our Military do nothing ... then expect tp be treated like God.



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170,905 A sandwich always tastes better when cut on the diagonal.



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170,904 More Carson lies have been uncovered. The man has issues. Why doesn't America denounce the guy and move on? We are weird in that way. Some public figures are just in favor. They can do no wrong. The public is too enamored. So yes, Carson has issues. But the public does too.



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170,903 He "got you" pregnant? Typical airhead. Of course taking responsibility for your actions doesn't factor in...idiot.



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170,902 I have a friend (kinda) who's a shitty artist and thinks he's great.  Why does that give me such pleasure?  I love every lousy thing he posts, like it gives me power every time he fails.  I guess I'm no better than the rest.



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170,901 To the firefighter/paramedic: seek assistance. You have PTSD and there is help out there. There is no shame or dishonor.



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170,900 I have been sleeping with someone I have repeatedly tried to break up for mistreatment, and over the summer he apparently lost his mind missing me and feeling regret. I let him back in, and he got me pregnant. Of course we can't take care of it alone or together, so I am getting an abortion. The secret is, the day I found out I also told him I was sick of being with him on his terms, and blocked his phone number, ready to get rid of us (no specific basis, my emotions were totally going insane....hormones?). But when I found out, I had to call him. He has been so supportive, is taking care of everything, of me, and came over to comfort me (I am so scared of killing the baby). I said thank you for coming over so late (3am) and he thanked me for being so strong. Last week I had an emotional breakdown and nearly attempted suicide, unknowingly, that it was likely due to severe hormonal changes. I attacked him and again, he took care of me. Despite all of the trouble....I think years down the line I'll never regret a moment between us.



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