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171,999 Single woman, loves doing all the crazy sexual things. Cooks amazing, cleans, creative, helpful, submissive just enough. Yet single. Can't get someone to fall for me if my life depended on it. Only about 10 lbs overweight, usually only in the winter. I'm told I'm too nice. I'm too much of a people pleaser. Maybe I lose myself in trying to be everything I want to be. Amazing in everyway, which is the reason I'm alone. Damned if I do, damned if I don't. 😥



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171,998 It just takes one uptight person to spoil a gang bang for everyone. This should be an adage.



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171,997 It's been my experience that divorced women will do anything sexually to rope in a new husband. When married, the woman might have hated swallowing semen. But after the divorce, she allows new potential marriage partners to do it in her mouth and she gulps it down like candy. At his request she will flash in public. She will allow him to take nude photos. She will lick his dirty asshole. She will do every depraved thing she loathed and refused to do when married. All so she can show the new man she is fun and sexy and open minded, with the hope he'll want to marry her. All the while she detests what she's doing.

How do I know this? I'm the divorced woman who is currently dating men and looking to be married again.

PS - I hate myself.



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171,996 It feels so great....I have no feelings left for you. I look at old pics and it disgusts me.  Finally, I can say Ewwww, I was with her?   Ya, that's for you, E.



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171,995 I am alone for xmas. i should kill myself while i still can.



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171,994 I'm to the point where I would do anything for life to get better...



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171,993 i just wish i could share my feelings with people. everyone assumes i'm happy. everyone stopped asking. i start acting really shallow when my feelings get involved into the situation and lead people on that I am the happiest girl alive. i can't cry in front of my boyfriend, not even in front of my mom. my dad died when i was 9, and I quietly returned to class after hearing the news. it would be best for me to run outside and scream my lungs out. maybe i wouldnt be a fuck up then. i go to uni, train a lot and charisma is my second name. but it's all fake, i do it to distract myself from the posdibility of crying all night long. i've kept up this game for so long, that not even people closest to me see through it. my bf tries to talk to me about it, and eventually i do feel better, only to go home later and cry. i guess a person cannot have it all. i have a rotten soul that no one but i ever has to live with. and when you're all cried out, you just feel so empty, with a slight pressure around your chest and throat area. it's amazing how a person can learn to cry uncontrollably in silence...



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171,992 Oh, my God! What the fuck is wrong with me? I usually ace the personality tests for these jobs but I keep just barely failing this one. Damn it! It would have been a great job, too. I finally could have had a good job. Now I'm going out of my head waiting to find out if my final attempt was a success. Lord, please help me get a better job to help provide for my kids and let it be a job that I enjoy. Meanwhile, I'll just keep building up my skills. I have far more to offer now than I did ever before. Just gotta keep going.



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171,991 I have a thing for Asian women.  I'm married, but I always wanted to have sex with an Asian, and I never knew how or where to make this happen.  Five years ago I'm sitting at the table with the wife, reading the paper, when I see an article about an Asian massage parlor getting busted for prostitution.  I read the article amazed - here is a newspaper article telling me everything I need to know about how to fuck an Asian woman under the guise of getting a massage.  The article even mentioned website I could go to find where these "massage parlors" are in my area.

But I was still scared to go.  I've never visited a hooker, I don't want to get caught, and I don't want diseases.  But for 6 months the article just stayed in my mind.  Finally, I get a subscription to one of the websites.  7 more months go by as I read reviews and stories.  

Finally, I tell myself I'm going to do it.  I'm not getting any younger.  I pick out a massage parlor in the area, make an excuse to my wife about visiting a friend, and leave the house.  I find the place, and scared as shit I park off to the side and approach the house.  I enter through the front door and am met by a cute 35-year old Chinese woman with a nice body.  It's too late for me to turn back.  She leads me up the stairs to a back bedroom where a massage table is and tells me to get comfortable.  I know what this means from the websites I visited - it means get naked and lie face down on the table.  I do just that.

By now my heart is pounding.  The Chinese woman enters the room and starts giving me a massage.  I take a chance and begin running my hands up and down her legs to signal I'm interested in more.  After 30 minutes she tells me to turn over, and the next thing I know I've given her 80 bucks and she's leaning over the table jerking me off as I suck her tits hard.  "You like baby!" she laughed.  Yeah, I like sucking titties, what can I say.  Finally, I blow my load as she keeps pounding away.  She cleans me up, I get dressed, and follow her back downstairs.

As I leave, I see a blonde with huge tits.  She's Russian, I suppose, but I'm amazed that here at this out of the way place are all these women just looking forward to the possibility of jerking me off.  

I went back about 10 more times.  If I were teleworking, I'd stop by so I could get jerked off on company time.  Sometimes I'd just get horny and drop by.  Almost everytime there was a different girl there.  After a while I became adept at making the girls cum at the same time they made me cum.  I'd go in thinking, "This time I'm going to titty fuck the girl and cum on her tits and face."  It was like Disneyland for adult men.  I loved it.

Then the place got shut down.  But I had my fun.



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171,990 More hooker stories!! They fascinate me.

26/f



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171,989 I am perfect. I am wonderful. I am amazing, sunshine flows from my asshole in sparkling rivulets ...and in no way am I self-aggrandizing or self-entitled. Blah, blah, blah...ME. ME. ME. Just reading between the lines.



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171,988 Worst fart I've ever had... I was driving a friend home.  But I had been constipated for the previous few days.  About five minutes before I got him home, I felt my bowels about to erupt.  I held it in until he got out of the car, and as I was driving away I let loose.  Holy shit, it smelled like month-old rotting garbage.  It was cold out and the windows were up.  I could feel my eyes watering from the stench.  As I drove off I sniffed it deep into my nostrils, but even then it was too much to handle and I started gagging.  The whole car smelled like shit.



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171,987 I am a nice girl. I treat everyone with respect no matter what. I'm not entitled, I work hard and I'm back in school for a new career. I work out 6 days a week, and work out hard. As a result of it, I have earned a nice body. I'm not gorgeous, but I know my face is pretty. Random people compliment me daily, and although sometimes it makes me uncomfortable, I appreciate it and never take it for granted.

I am a total freak behind closed doors. I absolutely love giving head. I'm adventurous. I have a positive outlook on life, and try to enjoy every minute of it. I appreciate the little things. I was in a nine year relationship where I did everything for the other person. I spent many holidays not even getting a card, let alone a present, despite the fact I would take time and money to make sure I gave my man a great suprise. I finally broke free a year and a half ago, and I'm starting to learn my self worth.

It makes me very sad to read all the posts on here about how awful some women are. I promise you, not every one of us is miserable. There are nice women left. I'm hopeful that one day I'll be lucky enough to be in love again, but this time with someone who treats me as good as I treat them. And I hope if you are in a bad relationship, you find the strength to walk away, and stop being so unhappy!!  

If anything, I hope everyone has a great day
33/F :)



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171,986 A rich guy gets a huge Christmas bonus from work, buys a Ferrari, races down the residential streets of my neighborhood, and promptly crashes into a tree and dies.

Good riddance asshole. God has spoken.



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171,985 You deserve what ever you get, even if it's years after the fact, torturing people with your presence. You were there for years when nobody wanted you, so you deserve the same in return. The good news for you is, it won't happen in kind, though that is exactly what you deserve. This has nothing to do with letting go. It's all about karma.



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171,984 There's a photo plastered in the local newspapers today. It's shows a fellow caught on security camera stealing a purse from a shopping cart. The thing is, it looks just like me. No, like, really remarkably like me. I don't own the jacket the guy is wearing, but I'm sure someone will say it's me and that I changed my coat. Fuck.



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171,983 As long as someones flaws do not affect my well being...
I find them endearing.



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171,982 I hate being sad and angry all the time.  I don't know how to be happy all the time, or at least be in an OK mood all day.  I was raised in a bad environment as a child.  I wonder if I'm going to be broken for life.



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171,981 171958 - I feel your pain and anger. Welcome to the real world of hot bodies, cut abs, big dicks, tight pussies, and fake adventures. Keep your head up.



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171,980 I hate when I meet new people and their first question is, "So what do you do?".  What difference does it make?  Did you think I planned on talking about work at this party/coffee shop/wherever the hell we are?  I'm a mathematician, OK.  Now, hurry up with your oohing and aahing (lame!), amateur musings about game or string theory (boring!), or stories about how you were good at math in high school (and???) so we can get back to regular, interesting conversations.



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171,979 I don't know how people fall out of love. I really don't.



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171,978 I google every single person I meet.  Why wouldn't I?  People say it's creepy but then after we hang out a few times they admit they read all of my "rate my professor" reviews, etc.  Oh, you mean you googled me?  That same shit you act all offended about if I admit it first?



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171,977 Why don't you love me?



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171,976 It wasn't just a mind meld. She was a very attractive woman in all respects. I have no doubt at all that she still is. In my mind's eye I knew that she would age like a fine wine.

I couldn't allow myself to pull her down into the pit with me.

And when I did try to be good for someone I foundered and almost buried us both.

It doesn't inspire much confidence, but at least I've finally run out of secrets.



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171,975 I am always disappointed when I fart into my hand and it smells like nothing.  

One time though, I farted and my hand stank for a few hours.  Like it had been sprayed with shit.



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171,974 You are free.  So fly west little bird and never return.



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171,973 I am married but I know I will be raising my baby alone.  Yes, I said my baby.  You are as dependable as a wet napkin full of rocks.



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171,972 I'm glad she helped you through your PTSD. I'm glad you're happy with her.

But still, you could have come to me for help, why didn't you ask me? Did you not think I could handle it? Did you think I was going to start bugging you to date me?

I want to get over my crush on you, but it's hard. I just really care about you, and you're the first personal I've felt an 100% attraction to. I just want to prove to you that I could be a great girlfriend. Hell, just good to you in general. In the friend sense, I still can.

I won't get in between you and her, because that's not how I am and I won't do that shit to you. But I just wish you had come to me for help instead. I love you. I really do. I may not be a professional therapist but I would have tried my damnedest to help you, even if you blatantly told me to fuck off in a fit of rage. I've helped out suicidal friends before, sacrificing sleep and even fighting off drowsiness by talking them out of it and not leaving them be until I'm confident they're okay.

If this new relationship goes tits up, I'll prove to you that I could do better. I just hope you'll give me the chance. Please.



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171,971 There's a good chance I will spend the rest of my life just staring at the ceiling, briefly interrupted by periods of time just spent staring at the sky.

That's actually a pretty big improvement to what was happening for awhile.

Driving through life with my hands off the wheel.



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171,970 I know that you had a crush on me. I got the text from your friend that was meant for you. It's harmless. I wish I had known at the time. Talk about clueless...



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171,969 Miss you right now, paramour

You're the only one to make me cum since scoundrel fishy been gone
I want to give a real prospect a chance
But I am tired
So tired
And though we are completely inappropriate together
We speak each other's language

My fondest memory of our last time together
Besides my orgasm
Your orgasm
Our conversation
And dancing
Was when I came out from going to my bathroom and you had got up from the couch, gone to my laundry basket,
And chose a pair of my hot pink lacy panties to casually drape upon your head
For me to see upon my return
And then you just sat there as if to see if I'd notice



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171,968 I gave my boss a book of brain teasers for Christmas. He thanked me. Hahaha. I gave it to him to be mean. He's the biggest idiot I know. I'm sure he can't answer a single question in the book. Moron. He's too dumb to even realize the gift was meant as an insult.



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171,967 When people upset me my heart races out of control and I become tongue tied. All I can do is walk away. I feel like such a coward for my inability to confront people.



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171,966 My wife tries to manipulate. So disappointing. She concocted a plan where I'll be driving our family to her sister's house on Christmas Day. She knew the kids and I wouldn't be too fond of the idea. All the adults there do is sit around and get drunk. Not my thing. So she does the stupidest thing possible, she lies about it. She tells me I agreed to it and I'm just forgetting. I used to fall for her shit, but not anymore. I made it clear that if she ever lied or manipulated again, then I'm doing whatever I please and she can go to hell. And now she's done it. So I told her to fuck herself. The kids and I are staying home and watching Christmas movies. She can drive to her sister's all alone and they can get drunk as usual. Merry Christmas you self centered alcoholics.



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171,965 There are few things more generally depressing to me than women's MMA.  The sight of women beating the shit out of each other disturbs and saddens me.



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171,964 At some point in my thirties.... I realized I wasn't a Disney Princess.... My life wasn't perfect.... There was no Eric, or Aladdin, or Captain John Smith who would sweep me off my feet.... Admittedly I became bitter and resentful.... My parents had lied to me all those years.... Telling me how perfect I was.... Telling me how beautiful I was.... I lied to me.... It was a hard landing falling from such a lofty height.... Now I'm a bitch.... Fuck you mom, dad and Disney.



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171,963 I'm confident that we're all supposed to be in each others lives. It's just taking us a little longer (a lot longer) to figure out exactly how.



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171,962 I'll tell you  the truth about porn starts and strippers , most of them have very boring and normal life's outside the strip club and the porn set. I met many porn stars and by porn starts I mean the famous ones the ones that have contracts and are well know . I once remember having a conversation back stage with one who had just had a baby , she was so concern and worry the her fans will notice that almost none existing stretch marks mind you she was in great shape . Me and the rest of the girls were reassuring her she look great and didn't need to cover her abs, well when the Dj announce her to come up she grab a scarf and tie up around the waist and her fans could care less they were just happy and exited to meet her in person . At the end of the night she was telling us how exited and happy she was to go back at the hotel to see her baby and her boyfriend who were waiting for her.  Just like a normal working mom , except she was a porn star .  Most of them are like that they live normal lives and have the same insecurities as most woman do. The fantasy only lives in mans brains and I'm sorry to blow your bubble to all males out there , they don't take out their clothes or have sex on videos for your pleasure , they just view it like any other job that pays the bills.



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171,961 My beloved, object of unending obsession, married, blah blah blah, rear-ended me at my first Christmas party after I started working there.  Like came up to me as I was leaning over my chair to get my drink/purse/something and totally ground into me.  It was unmistakable and I wasn't dressed anywhere near provocatively.  I contemplate frequently if wifey/anyone else saw him do it.  I love that memory.



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171,960 She and and I love each other.  We are well-matched in intelligence, education, career interests, religious background, political views, financial outlook, hobbies.  We have an active and mutually rewarding sex life.  It's all good.

We've been a loving couple for 47 years and hope for many more.  Our secret for success might not work for others but it does for us.  The secret: we are not married.  Our commitment is renewed every day.  If I ever mistreat her she will walk away... and vice-versa.

--M/70+



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171,959 I wish I could meet the poster below me. We'd be perfect together. I like women for their brains and for being insightful, as you clearly are. Why can't people like us ever manage to cross paths?



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171,958 There are so many men online who are lame and complain all the time they can't get laid and, oh gee, if only if I were a woman I would get laid alllll the time. Because any woman can get laid, just like that, by snapping her fingers. Well, lemme tell ya kids, if you're old and fat like me, that doesn't apply. And ever since I turned 30, I am horny as HELL. I masturbate about twice a day. I watch porn every night, just like guys like you. But because I don't look like your beloved porn stars/celebrities, blah blah blah, I won't be getting a second look. Yeah so, life sucks, let's all keep watching porn online and not talking to each other. Good idea.



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171,957 if people can't bother proof reading the emails they send, why should I bother reading it?



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171,956 When did bachelorette parties turn into slutty events where otherwise decent women go to a strip club and suck on rubber sexual toys? I will never again go to one of these tasteless and misguided sendoffs. No wonder why marriages these days don't last. People these days have no respect for what marriage means. And they have no respect for themselves. Really? I had to watch my new daughter in law put a penis shaped dildo in her mouth? Really??????????????



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171,955 Two very lazy, angry, overgrown babies-a perfect match. No one to stand up to your nonsense. Good riddance.



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171,954 Company Christmas parties are awkward. No one likes them except the secretaries. They get all dolled up in black dresses and fishnet stockings. A fuck me look. But all the men are married and they are not about to screw around in front of people from the company. Could you imagine the rumors? Plain and simple, the formula doesn't work. Can the party and give us bigger bonuses.



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171,953 My panties get a hole in them at the same place every time, right where the pee comes out. I must have acidic pee and it burns a whole through th fabric. :(



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171,952 Let me tell you about women. This happened to my brother. He married his wife. In the first year she put out a stocking for Christmas with her name on it. No stocking for him. She told him that as well as buying her big presents, he was supposed to fill up her stocking too.

He did as directed.

She pouted. She explained that the stocking shouldn't contain inexpensive items like chocolate bars.  No no no. She expected him to put fancy things like jewelry in the stocking.

Next year she put out two stockings, one for her and one for... her again. She said he could make up for the first year fuck-up by filling two stockings with diamonds and gold.

He was taken aback at her gluttony. He said he didn't think that's what marriage should be about. He said he loved her and she should be happy they are together.

She pouted and refused to be physical with him.

There was no third Christmas together. They divorced. He's still in a funk about it. He doesn't understand what happened. He thought he married the love of his life. But she viewrd their marriage as her winning the lottery.



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171,951 Waiting for just the right person that will always care for me and treat me with passion for the rest of time is a lonely feat. I still have hope, though. Its hard to remember to treat myself well in the meantime though too. I get so busy with life that I forget to live with passion. I think practicing this may help me be a better mate in the future. Fingers crossed. :)



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171,950 There is nothing better than those 2 seconds when you feel the cum blasting from your cock into her mouth and she swallows it. It's the best 100 bucks I pay for anything every month.



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171,949 She lies and lies and lies. I don't know what's up anymore.



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171,948 Men are the biggest cry babies. They complain about being married and don't do anything to change the situation. Why? Must not be that bad. Pack up your shit and leave. Simple.

40/f



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171,947 There are no winners in marriage. It's a fairytale perpetrated by the women in our culture. It's a trap.



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171,946 My wife was scary mad at me this morning. Out of nowhere she yelled how I never took her out to dinner on her birthday a month ago. She called me lazy and thoughtless.

Like huh? I reminded her that I offered to take her out, but she declined.

She screamed how that doesn't matter.

It doesn't?  I think it matters 100%.  I offered to take her out and she said no and now I'm in trouble for not taking her out.

This is the type of thinking that makes me hate being married.



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171,945 When I watch porn I always have a picture of a woman I want to fuck on the screen next to the video.  I make sure the girl getting fucked in the video looks like the picture of the woman I want to fuck.  I look at the woman's pic when I cum, and I always cum way harder.  I wonder how many other men do this?



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171,944 I've known a guy for 40 years.  We met in elementary school.  Like buddies do, we made a lot of jokes about sucking dick for money and other rude things like that.  He always made more jokes to me than I made to him, but I figured that was the way he did things.  

One day he was making a joke with his daughter about a particular phrase.  The two laughed about it.  It was nice to see a dad and his girl laugh like that.  A year later I found myself bored at work and decided to look at what people's recovery questions were on their e-mail accounts.  His was the start of the phrase he and his daughter laughed about a year earlier... and I suddenly realized that his password was the end of the phrase.  This was before you'd get sent e-mails from the provider telling you your account was logged on from another computer, so the temptation was too much.  I also knew he'd look in my e-mail if he could, so I logged in.

There in his e-mails were all these exchanges from men he met on Craigslist.  He was meeting up with them for mutual dick sucking.  It was then I realized that he wasn't just "joking" with me all these decades about sucking dick, he was testing the waters to see how I'd respond.  Although I thought it was a bit odd at times how he'd make dick sucking jokes to me, it never occurred to me what he was doing.

It's all cool, though.  He'll always be one of my closest friends, and I've done the exact same thing with women, bringing up sex to see how they'd respond, and sometimes I'd get lucky.  I don't blame him for wanting his dick sucked.  Our only difference is that he's bi and I'm straight.



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171,943 I'm new at my job, but I've been in my field for 20 years.  None of what I do is new to me.  I was given a particular project that was similar to many others I've done in the past.  I first look over the project and realize that it's outdated and useless.  Many other companies exist solely to do exactly what our project does on the side.  Our data shows that few people even look anymore at what we have to offer.  I write up a paper explaining this, and suggest that we kill the project and focus our time and resources elsewhere.  

The boss overrules me, claiming that many people still use our product.  This isn't true, the data says so.  But I'm new and think that he knows something I must have missed.  Plan 1 is killed.  He tells me to draw up a project plan.  I do this and submit it to him.  He tells me to have another manager review it.  It takes her a week to review it.  She doesn't send back any suggestions, she sends back comments telling me to think about certain things and get it back to her.  Huh?  Weird, but I'm new, and I do this.  Takes her another week to go over.  Same thing happens again.  I return it to her, and then she says the plan is not in the proper format and doesn't contain the proper elements, and I should go back and redo it.  What?  Why the fuck didn't she tell me this three weeks ago??  Plan 2 is killed.

I put it in the "proper format," and another two revisions go through her.  Now it's been 6 weeks I've spent on a project that we don't even need, and nothing's been accomplished.  Finally, the manager says we have the right plan.  Boss looks at it and says okay, and I can move forward with Plan 3.  

Spend two weeks working on Plan 3 with a staffer, and I come in one morning to the staffer telling me the boss has killed the plan.  No input from me, he just killed it last night and drew up another completely different workplan.  Two months into a useless project, and the third plan is dead, and nothing's been accomplished.  Now it's Plan 4.

Staffer and I work on Plan 4 another three weeks.  Suddenly, at the end of the day on a Friday, we get an e-mail from the boss saying nothing's been accomplished, and now I need to work with another staffer and just do what we've done in previous years on the project.  Plan 4 is dead, it's three months behind schedule, and we don't even need it.  On to Plan 5.

I meet with the staffer, who briefs me on what the previous manager did.  Boss loves the previous manager and holds her on a pedestal.  One of the things the previous manager did was send a mass e-mail out to 700 organizations.  I go over the e-mail list, whittle it down to 400 people, and send it out.

The next day I get called into the boss' office first thing in the morning.  He's steaming mad.  How could I have sent out so many e-mails???  What is my problem???  For a fucking hour I get my ass reamed.  He tells me I'm not doing my job right, he's concerned about my performance, and I'm completely late on this deadline.  I'm shocked.  I tell him that the previous manager did the same thing, I am following what I was instructed to do, and we're late because he keeps unilaterally trashing the plans.  He tells me that the previous manager isn't here to explain herself, she must have had reasons for doing what she did, and it's still my fault the project is late.  I get back to my desk and I receive an e-mail from the boss reiterating that my job performance is lacking and I now must send all e-mails through him first.

Fuck this shit.  I am too old to put up with this bullshit.  The older I get, the harder it is for me to tolerate it.  I went on an interview the next day.  Fuck him.



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171,942 I've been working short term jobs in warehouses the past few years.  They have been pretty good jobs, good pay, most people are laid back.  You just come in, clock in, and do your job.  Pretty easy going.

Except for this certain warehouse I've gone to a few times the past few years.  It's for a popular store.  You are constantly tracked on the computers and rushed to meet a quota all day.  It is stressful and I hate it.  You are constantly watched, and if they don't feel like you are doing your job fast enough, or if you make a mistake, you are written up.  Today I was unfairly accused of wasting time at work, I was working all day, and I was sent to their office along with a few other random people.

I do not like this job.  It is so stressful and harassing  to work here.  It's so popular that it pays more than other warehouses and employs much more people than other warehouses, but I hate it here.  It's no fun to work here.  I like the other warehouses better.  You never have to deal with this shit everywhere else.  I'll take a pay cut if it means I don't have a controlling, anal employer constantly stalking me, watching me, sending me write ups.  Not all the warehouses have been perfect, but now I'm missing all the good ones I previously worked at.  Warehouses that just let you in to do your job.  Nice coworkers and managers that actually know you are doing your job.  No constantly being tracked on computers.

I'm going to sign up for a full time position at a better warehouse and stay there.



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171,941 If a telemarketer calls you, tell them to put you on the Do Not Call list.  They have to by law, it is a list you can put your phone number on so no telemarketers can legally call you.



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171,940 When some people describe their husbands they first say things like "trustworthy, dependable, a good father, loving, makes me feel secure and wanted, I feel loved, my life-partner", etc.  When I think about my husband, my first thoughts include "doesn't love me, I feel so alone, crippling resentment, not ever on my side, insensitive, he must hate me", etc.  There is something fundamentally wrong in my marriage.



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171,939 I'm reading a book that is informing on his verbal abuse and manipulation.  He'll have to stop or we won't go on very much longer...



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171,938 I met a girl a while back. We fooled around, spent time together, and we were happy. Hell, we explored each other a little more than I'd thought we would, but it was nonetheless a good time. For some reason, though, I had this thought in the back of my mind that it wasn't gonna work out, and that something was gonna come up. Sure enough, one night I'm absolutely plastered when she breaks things off. The pain and unhappiness I held in over the last few years came out in a form of drunken sobbing. I miss her, but she doesn't even care. I was just another temporary plaything for her; I'd become boring to her, so she had to put me away and move on. Man, I sure do get my hopes up for nothing.



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171,937 I purposely leave the completed crossword puzzle on my desk in the exact spot where people are most likely to see it. It looks like I just happened to put it down there, but it's by design. I want people to notice and praise me. I'm so vain and in need of attention.



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171,936 I few years ago I needed to get in touch with my local police commission.  They are the board which runs the police department. There is no way to call them directly.  I had to leave a voice mail.  It took 8 days for them to get back to me. As well as discussing the issue at hand, I mentioned how their chosen method of communication, leaving a voice mail, is completely ineffective.  How ridiculous that you call the police and it takes 8 days for them to get back to you!

There was a bit of a brouhaha in town about their delayed response. The police commission said they'd work on improving their procedures.

Last week I needed to talk to the police commission again. I had to once more leave a voice mail.  It's now been 8 days and counting....

What's that I read? People don't like the police? People don't trust the police? People don't stand behind the police? Gee, I wonder why that is....



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171,935 Just had a telemarketer call again, fifth working day in a row, all around dinner. I don't speak to them anymore. I ask them to hang on a second then set the phone down and forget it for a while. They will get the hint eventually after they waste enough of their time.



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171,934 How do I get Rachel from cardholder services to stop with her god damn credit card calls. Somewhere in the world the people responsible for these incessant telemarketing phone calls exist. One day they are going to mess. They will mention it someone  at a party or wherever. Then their lifeless body will be found in a rat infested ditch with a phone jammed up their ass. I hope this happens soon.



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171,933 What do you expect? You take this ugly flesh hose and stick in my most private part and squirt out some smelly goo. This is your entire focus in life. Yes, I try to take as much as I can from my husband. It's payback for being his cum dumpster.



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171,932 Never get married. My life was so much better before marriage. There were plenty of women. My paycheck was my own. My apartment was clean because that's who I am.

After marriage, it all turned to shit. Stacks of her crap everywhere. All bought with my money. Little to no physical contact. What the fuck is wrong with women? Why are you such greedy, manipulative, self entitled assholes? Don't bother answering. Whatever you say will be a lie.



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171,931 At first guess I would have thought fat people smell bad. But in reality I've found the opposite is true. Skinny people smell worse. It must have to do with self cleansing. Fat people have more inner juices which whisk away the smell.  Skinny people are dried up on the inside. There is no extra liquid to take away the bad parts. I'm talking about men and women, but it's particularly apparent when licking a fat woman's pussy as opposed to skinny woman's pussy. Not all the time, but more often a skinny pussy has a worse odor.



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171,930 The girl's high school basketball team is the seeding ground for lesbians. Been there, done that. Married now.



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171,929 I'm a divorced mother of 2 without health insurance. I have these fainting spells every few months. I get dizzy, my lips feel numb, I get hot and cold at the same time, tunnel vision, it's like I'm hearing from underwater...then I pass out. They scare the shit out of me and I feel like it's my heart as I have a very low heart rate of 60, sometimes lower. Maybe it's diabetes. I don't really know. I am so worried I'm going to die before my kids are settled in life. I'm the only stable person in their life and I work my ass off to make sure they know they are loved and that if the put their mind to it they can achieve anything.

I would do anything to be able to afford to go to the dr and get tests. But even if I find a clinic that is low cost I cannot take off. I could lose my job.

36, Houston Tx.



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171,928 it doesn't count if I have to ask you to apologize.



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171,927 I can not fight with sound advice.



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171,926 I'm a slackard. I sit on the couch all day. I watch TV. I eat. I nap. I pee. That's about it.

A few months ago I decided to change my ways. That was a monumental effort to even have the thought.

Today I made a huge stride forward towards that goal. I went into the desk drawer and pulled out pencil and paper.

I figure I'll write down things I need to do in order to change.

I won't actually do them yet.  But I will write them down.

Mind you, I didn't write down anything today. I merely got the paper and pencil ready.

Maybe in a few more months I'll write something down.



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171,925 Here's a secret I learned the hard way. Never marry the baby in the family. He grows up in age only. He continues to be the baby in his head and expects you to do everything for him.



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171,924 I really do not like this time of year, I haven't spent a Holiday with my family in years. I usually spend it with my girlfriend and her family, but we broke up this summer, I spent this thanksgiving with a friend and her family, it was so much fun, no drama, no judging no stress. I think for chirstmas I will just spend it with my dog. I love my family, but not the obnoxious drama. My Mom is so immature and envious, it pains her to say nice things about me, so she doesn't. When I told her I bought a house she actually yelled at me and told me I was probably getting ripped off because I was so stupid and had no idea what I was doing. Then she sat there and sulked, like she was so upset. I just don't get mad, I don't even let it bother me. I wish we got along like they do on TV, but we don't, so I just stay away as much as I can. you can choose your friends, but you can't choose your family, but you can make your own family, with friends.

47 M



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171,923 Our new co-author has come up with a twist ending. It's a doozy, too. Now we have room for a sequel. Then the screenplay. Making Of Specials. Merchandizing. And then comes the musical. Sure, as time progresses, we may get a little half-assed and make all the fans unhappy. But we won't give a shit. We'll have already proved everything we needed to prove.

Or maybe I'm just a little giddy. I couldn't figure out where the hell the plot was going. And my other co-author was dragging her feet for reasons known only to her. Cutting someone else in was her idea. She makes bold moves sometimes. I appreciate that about her. Left to my own devices I was just going to sit in my diaper and whine.



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171,922 My freezer is like a time machine. I froze some leftovers from a party I threw 13 years ago. We lost power since then. I'm sure everything in there thawed and was refrozen. Now the items are covered in a block of frosty ice. I'm not the best housekeeper.



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171,921 I remember there was a lot of pressure after college for us to find a partner and get married.  Everybody was seeing somebody, and in a 5-month period in 1995 I saw 9 of my friends get married.  Graduate college, get significant other, get married, have kids.  That's what they all did.

Except me.  I decided I wasn't going to get married until I met somebody right, and if I didn't meet somebody right, I wasn't going to get married.  I had a lot of insecure people telling me I wasn't getting married because I was immature and an overgrown child, but fuck them, I was living my life on my own terms.

20 years later, 7 out of 9 of those friends are divorced.  I've been happily married for 12 years.



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171,920 When I was in my 20s I thought that sleeping around was low class, hookers and strippers were awful, and the men who went to see them were worse.

Then I got older.  You probably could see where this is going.  

I hit 35 and my entire attitude changed.  Now it's not "low class" to see a hooker, it's just an "act."  The only moral difference between masturbation and a hooker is money and another person involved.  I don't even think it's immoral anymore.  We're wired to want sex.  Young women who strip love older men and get off on us.  How many times have I gotten a lapdance and the stripper cummed and made me cum?  Too many to count.  I know the hooker doesn't love me and she knows I don't love her.  We're just getting each other off and having a good time, then we leave and go back to our lives.

Fuck it, who cares?



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171,919 All of my friends are selfish bitches. I am so sick of all of them.



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171,918 It took me a long time but at some point I finally realized, or maybe it's more correct if I say I finally was willing to admit that my wife doesn't love me. Not even close. She needed to get married because that's what all her friends had already done. The only unmarried friend she had left was the weird overweight lesbian chick. They became best friends because it was their only choice.

Then I came along. Same sort of thing. My wife came onto me and got me to marry her because I was her only choice. In looking back, I think she has resented me all along, resented that she had to marry me or run the risk of being known as the girl who couldn't find a husband. After all, she was mid thirties when we first met. Well past the normal marrying age for women. No suitor had come a-calling for her.

Weird how the human psyche works. She needed me, but at the same time she hated me because I represented her inability to find a real partner. No one likes the boobie prize. And that's all I ever was, a boobie prize.

Everything fell in place once I confronted this truth. Everything suddenly made sense. She would spend as much time as possible away from home, constantly going out with her married friends. She would go on vacation without me, convincing her married girlfriends to do the same. After all these years we've only been on vacation once together and she acted bored and annoyed the entire time. Yet she's been on vacation a dozen times - all without me.

Other hints. She'd work out in the gym all the time. But of course, it was more time away from me. She'd never get me anything for my birthday or Christmas. It was also sad on Christmas day, she'd say she was so busy and she didn't have a chance to get me anything. But oh, she had a great idea in mind and she'll take care of it after the holidays. Then she'd forget and never follow through. Again, maybe more correctly, she hoped that I'd forget. On the other hand I always bought her presents. Of course I did. She was my wife.

And then there was sex. Or the lack of sex. I'm outright embarrassed how long we would go without sex. I'd say we had sex 10 times in our 11 years of marriage. I know, don't I sound like an idiot? Most married couples have sex 10 in the first week after their honeymoon. But yep, I had sex 10 times in 11 years. And it was deplorable sex. It would only happen after she had some wine and finally took pity enough on me and would give me access. And always the same format which she controlled. I'd give her an oral orgasm. Then she'd be annoyed I was looking for something in return. A few times we did manage intercourse. Then a few times she started to jerk me off, but fell asleep. And the really sad ones, I'd make her "happy" then she'd jump out of bed saying she had someplace to go and I should "take care" of myself. Like really? She wanted me to masturbate after she was out with her friends???

I'm so sick when I think of this marriage. I'm sick about the way she's treated me. I'm sick about how I let her.

At this point in my life I'd like to move on and say "Water under the bridge."  But it saddens me how I lost 11 years of my life to this disaster.



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171,917 I feel tonight, this morning, like the spell you had on me is broken!

Will be interesting to see if you contact me tho
Money aside
I don't wanna do you now
At all



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171,916 I had a girl who was the love of my life. We met young and spent years together, moved in and had a great life.  I came home early from work and found her with a guy. He was stunningly good looking.  I just turned away. My girl screamed and begged me not to leave that it was a bad mistake. I wasn't mad, just so hurt. I left. She kept calling and after a time we talked. I got it he was hot and if I was a girl maybe I'd have done the same. I did forgive her. But I couldn't forget. We got together again, but it was too hard. When we were in bed I would always think of her with him. I left again. She tried hard to get together again but I told her it just couldn't work. She said she wished it never happened.
I'm married now with 3 kids. I care deeply for my wife. But I'm in my sixties now, and the love of my life was that girl. I see her occasionally, and we'll have a coffee and just talk.  As good as my live is, sometimes I'm so sad it didn't work out all those years ago.  She was, and is, the love of my life.



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171,915 Whenever I disagree with my family about politics, I spend the next week worrying there's something wrong with me. Have I been brainwashed by the liberal media? Have I spent too much time around intellectual snobs? Have I strayed too far from religion?

Ultimately, it's just that they know the right buttons to push and I've developed my own ideas and opinions with age, but I always worry. Have I gone wrong? Is there something wrong with me for feeling this way?



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171,914 I have a wart on my foot. Gross. But I'm too lazy to do anything about it.



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171,913 Last March my wife took a new job as a secretary at an medical center. There are about 50 employees. The other day I went to the employee Christmas party. I met my wife's boss for the first time. She was very nice. I was then introduced to the doctor who runs the whole shebang. It was immediately clear he didn't even know my wife's name. Embarrassing for my wife. What a douche the doctor is. People work for him and he doesn't even bother to learn their names?



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171,912 So, the asshole I made the cheesecake for who broke up with me yesterday, is now in a relationship according to facebook. Are you kidding me?

I hope he gets an incurable, exceedingly uncomfortable STD from his man whore ways.

Shit like this is why my tribe will eventually die out due to diminished blood lines, we use blood quantum for enrollment. No smart woman wants to date a man within the tribe. They're all like this asshole. I'd say we deserve to die out. Thankfully, I'm half. I have enough blood to qualify any future children.



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171,911 Baby....you blew it all.  Quit crying and move on because I have.



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171,910 All I do is think about you, babe...while out shopping I would smile and think how much you would like a certain item I have selected for you.
Then the cold reality hit me, and I need to pull myself together trying not to cry. ## #xoxo missing you...



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171,909 By the way krissy if you are reading this your husband used to come to my work while you were dating him / engage to him but don't worry I have nothing to do with him however you should ask her about a 22 year old girl name Mia ,  you want to hear the funny part , she looks a lot like you except she was younger and short and didn't have any Chinese in her . She was like 5 ft , 98 pound small breast , long dark hair and your hubby used to follow her like a dog and did I mention she was a drunk to who used to sleep around , last I heard she was waiting tables in Michigan . So next hubby have work meetings on Detroit make sure you check yourself for stds he might bring from her .



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171,908 No, baby, I don't believe I got trich fom "sitting on a dirty toilet seat in those pool halls" I frequent...nice lame try at deflection, fool...BTW, I do a "hover" when I tinkle in a public Ladies but that's besides the point

You nasty
You sound ignorant

And ya can't shoot for shit



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171,907 It was Oct 2003 the first time I ever contacted a hooker. I was 43. She was a girl from Erotic Services on Craigslist, which they no longer have now. I had a girlfriend then but the sex was unsatisfying. All I wanted was a blow job. I didn't realize it then but the girl must have been a beginner because I sent her a dozen emails and she answered every one of them convincing me to meet her. I told her I wanted "oral contact" and she said no problem. I asked if I could see and feel her tits. She said you got it. I agreed to meet her for 100 dollars in Portsmouth, NH at the traffic circle liquor store. I can remember driving up there from Boston, feeling excitement, panic, desire, fear, terror, horniness. I hadn't jerked off in about 2 weeks so there was no chance of dysfunction. It would be one thing to not be able to cum with the girlfriend -- but I couldn't take the shame of not cumming with a hooker. When I got to the liguor store I wanted to keep driving home. I thought she would be fat and ugly, or a total greasy druggy, or she would take out a knife and rob me or while I was with her a guy would roll and beat me. I was terrified and horny. Then i saw a car with flashing headlights. I got in. She started driving. I asked where we were going and she said, "a private place." we drove to a Holiday Inn parking place. We started to make out -- I should have known she was a novice then too -- they never let you kiss them. Then a car pulled in with some drunk college kids and we had to move. It was a boner killer. But then she took off her shirt and bra. Again, I knew later she was a beginner because her nipples were hard as acorns and sticking out. She was actually turned on. We went at it again, she took my cock out and put her mouth on it and sucked me for awhile. Then she stopped and asked me if I liked it. "You know I love it" I said and she went at it. I cummed like crazy all over her mouth and she swallowed and licked. Then she looked up and smiled at me. Cum was all over her face. I actuaally felt badly that I came all over her face -- I didn't realize it was part of the "service". "Did you like it?" she asked. I could have wept I was so happy. Then I gave her the money. That's when I knew she was a beginner -- no whore blows before getting the money. She told me she was a college girl raising money for her and her boyfriend at UNH. Hookers will say anything but she seemed amateurish and sincere. It was great fun. I saw her about a half dozen times after that. She sucked my cum out every time and took my load all over her tits and face. Since then I have seen over 100 hookers, maybe more, but she was the first and best memory of all that I have ever had. I love cumming on a whore's face and I save up a big load for it every time. The best ones are the ones who think it's disgusting.



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171,906 Babe, we were dysfunctional to one another.  I hope you find that perfect partner for life.  Peace out.



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171,905 I get this feeling, this aching feeling her last message was not meant for me...oh, ouch. The perils of a younger woman. Or, women in general?

I'm slipping from your grasp, and for all my faults, the quality of my character alone will be a huge loss, for the both of us.



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171,904 I can't believe your poor ex whatever she was used to suck your toes...your toenail fungus would trip my gag reflex just a looking so I tried to avert my eyes...those stubby little fungal nubs...reminded me of walking through the forest and seeing those layered mushrooms that would grow at the bottoms of tree trunks...So much good modern medicine around to deal with that kind of thing, I mean, take care of that shit!

You ought to pay mind to washing your ass better too



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171,903 Black opsIII or any COD online really. Is a game where you are assigned to a side of elite warriors that represent some of the best warriors that has served this nation (BOIII) kinda excluded, they're aligned with a mystery futurist organization. But, the ethos is one of teamwork.

In the online MP it is bedlam, no cohesion, no strategy to speak of, just run and gun, every man for himself.

In The Last Of Us, a every man for himself apocalyptic world, where resources are scarce and enemies come to you smiling. It is a great day to have twenty bullets, or eight shells. And, the lines of good and bad are blurred and grey. The hero has once been also a villain.

In TLOS Factions (online mp) 4v4 unit cohesion and team work, are essential. The number of different stratagems and tactics are astounding. When you see a mate being shot, or downed and or beaten and interrogated, you rush into the fray firing, throwing homemade bombs, using handcrafted weapons and fists of needs be to help you mate and revive him.

Irony abounds. The game that has the title where duty to county and rightenouss calls, is a every man for himself game with nearly no team communication.

The game of post apocalyptic every man for himself has the polar opposite, and provides the most emotional gaming experience...ever!

Is this the way of our country? The have nothings will stick together and put our lives on the line for thy neighbour when the chips are down. And, in contrast the other game. Americas finest equipped to inflict massive damage when unleashed by a government that cares not foe its own people, but worries about refugees not its homeless, or the impact the aforementioned will have on its impoverished.

Life imitating art, or art imitating life?



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171,901 I find quite hysterical how people set social media to make believed. I know this woman that post this pictures of her "vacations"  and makes it sound as her and her husband took a vacation . The so call fabulous vacation is actually a business trip who they are getting a reimbursement from her husband company . I'm not jealous of her or envy her but I just think is funny how she wants her friends to see her , another example she used to tell her friends that her husband own the company he works for lol . While the guy has a high paid job he far from the owner he might own a few shares given as a bonus . Bitch if I wanted to see the world I ll be doing right now , I get to fly for free practically every where in the world due to my dads job who happens to have many passports fills with stamps from all over the world that he had accumulated over  40 years .



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