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175,799 I'm a male.  I only have male children.  Let the perverts use the women's room.  Not my monkeys, not my circus.



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175,798 I was stung by a bee on my breast. It hurt bad. I wanted pity from my husband on this. But I couldn't tell him about it because the bee was karma's way of punishing me. I went running with a "friend". We do it about once a month. We go off the trail and end up naked in the woods. That's when the bee stung me. I'd have a hard time making up an excuse to my husband as to how a bee stung me in the breast while I was supposed to be wearing a running shirt and sports bra.



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175,797 Even you hairdresser knows you are certifiably crazy !



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175,796 I post so much in online forums because it's the only time I get to communicate with people.  I have no job, no family. My only contact with people is the woman working the cash register at the supermarket, and online forums.



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175,795 Your butt stinks.



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175,794 It makes me so, so sad that people are such virulent assholes when it comes to transgender issues. These are the people who thought that gay people shouldn't have rights, and before them immigrants, and before that jews and before that women and before that blacks and before that catholics, and so on and so forth (see where I'm going with this?). Talk about a slippery slope!

I'm a woman and I would gladly share a bathroom with anyone who feels that their gender identity aligns with being female. The reality is that if someone, whether a man or a woman, transgender or not, wants to harm me in the bathroom, a simple stick figure sign won't stop them.

I don't agree with a lot of what Obama has done in his Presidency, but I absolutely agree with how he is handling this. Declaring that certain people don't have rights (I'm looking at you, North Carolina) is simply unconstitutional. This "issue" is just people freaking out over a nothing. Transgender people have been using bathrooms with the rest of us for decades now but because certain assholes want to suddenly make this a problem everyone is freaking out.

At the end of the day, anyone who wants to be a different gender or non-gendered or both genders or polygender or whatever, deserves rights just like the rest of us. I'm all for people having different opinions, but anyone who thinks that others shouldn't have rights for whatever reason is part of the problem.



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175,793 Wow.  So Obama decreed that transgender kids can go in the bathrooms of their "gender identity" in schools.  Meaning if a boy wants to be a girl he can go in the girls room.  Wtf?  idc, im not pc and i don't care to be.  This is wrong.  He's trying to fuck up the country as much as possible before he leaves office.  This is evil, a slippery slope, i know not a lot of people believe in God nowadays but this country is going to shit.  So if a boy wakes up and feels like his gender identity is a girl and wears a dress and some makeup he can go in the girls room and look at girls?  Does no one see the problems that will come from this?  Does no one see 3 steps ahead?  What's wrong with the old way, biology?  Whatever you were born with is where you go?  Born with a dick, boys room.  Born with a pussy, girls room.  The end.  This is bad.  And you know public bathrooms are next.  There's not enough chaos with kids beating each other up to death and taping it and putting it online?  Do you really think a boy with hormones raging through him who wants to wear a dress one day to go in the bathroom with girls won't try to record some girls and then put it online?  This will open up a huge pandora's box of problems.  This country is fucked.  I know things change but the last few years it's been huge extreme changes and for the worse.  i don't want a boy dressed as a girl in the bathroom with any young female relative that I have.  Are people retarded?  All this progressiveness and enlightenment and moving forward and all it's doing is unraveling rules that have been in place forever, making shit blurry and now no one knows what's what and people are confused.  If everyone was inherently good it might work, but lots of people aren't.  They push to get what they want.  Do you really think a boy with raging hormones won't lie to be in the bathroom with young girls?  Did we become a country of socially stupid people that don't know what that can lead to?



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175,792 There's so much that I wished could have happened today. In reality nothing happened and that hurt my heart.



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175,791 Rooting for you, 790



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175,790 I'm fighting bulimia, anorexia, and alcoholism. I won't buy another bottle. I won't put my finger down my throat. I will eat at least 500 calories a day. It's a start. I can't tell anyone. I'm moving forward from here. And I'm doing it alone because I can't handle crappy attempts at support or mean judgements. Then, once I hit my target, medically healthy weight for my height no more dieting. I know the right calorie count. Once this bottle runs out I won't buy alcohol again. Baby steps. I know I'm pathetic but it's progress. I will beat these things.



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175,789 I NEED to get back to the gym Monday.  I'm scared to go back. I used to RELISH the gym...going 5 or 6 times a week.  But that feels like a lifetime ago.  My knees will be knocking when I walk through that door.  IF I walk through that door.



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175,788 Today's small victory is that I put pants on. Tomorrow's small victory will be that I might leave the house. Maybe one day I will once again have the life that depression has taken from me.



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175,787 people are fucking pissing me off. I really want to be a model and I get a lot of offers but my mom and my bf dont want me taking bikini photos. like uffffff i have been working out so hard. I want to move out, I'm almost 21 and I dont want to be put down by other people's perceptions of what is good. There is always something wrong, the photographer is too old, i dont want you showing your ass to strange people. I study in university, I am a perfect daughter, I eat healthy, have good friends, don't go out and get drunk a lot, I take care of myself. But I really dont see myself working at thw government later, which is one of the possible directions after my master. There will come a time where I will be able to do my thing. I just need to find a serious job and move the fuck out.



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175,786 The same Democrats who are complaining about how the Democratic Party hands out its delegates votes are the same Democrats who will be voting for another Democrat for president this year.  And in four years. And in four years after that.  And after that, and...



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175,785 Sorry, Ron.  I know that project you've been working on for the last ten years is your life's work.  I know you had dreams of making it big with it.  You very well could have.  You're exceptionally talented.

Yeah, so I'm sorry I'm cutting you and your project out from being mentioned in the short story I wrote that'll be published in a very famous national magazine in two months.  I didn't even tell you you were mentioned.  It was going to be a pleasant surprise for you.  It was going to give you both the notice you deserved and the endorsement you needed.  It was some serious attention you were about to get.

Next time, don't insult people on Facebook because they don't toe your ideological line.  We are adults.  We are allowed to have disagreements.  Insulting people can have consequences.

In your place, I put someone else, a real friend of mine.  We don't always agree on stuff, but we respect each other.



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175,784 If I had a time machine, I wouldn't use it to save the world or any stupid crap like that.

I'd use it to go back in time one hour. I'd knock on my door and explain to myself who I was. Then I'd get down on my knees and suck my own dick. I'd swallow too.



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175,783 I'm addicted to porn and masturbation.



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175,782 I found out today that you have to tell your iPad not to sync the internet pages you're looking at with your iPhone.  It does it automatically.  I found this out when I saw porn pop up on my iPhone.  I fucking hate Apple.



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175,781 It is illegal for the money appropriated to Planned Parenthood to be used for abortions.

The public money is put into PP's bank account, where it is used to offset the bills that are paid by PP's privately acquired funding.

Instead of using $100 of its private funding to pay a bill, PP uses $100 of its public funding to pay the bill instead.

The $100 of private money is then used on abortions.

The public funding frees up the private funding, which is then used for abortions.

It's as if I give a crackhead $100 for food, and that lets him use his own $100 for crack.

It's called "enabling."

But it's illegal for PP to use public funding for abortions.

See how that works?



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175,780 deleted



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175,779 Even celebrity millionaires like fat girls. 😉



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175,778 I wish my life had a: rewind, pause, delete & fast forward button.



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175,777 As a taxpayer, I wouldn't mind paying for other people's abortions.

I have some altruistic-sounding reasons.  But then there is also this:

Let's say there are people who "kill their baby" to continue partying.  Do you really think having a baby would stop them from ignoring the baby altogether to continue partying?  Do you really want someone who will "kill a baby to keep on partying" to be in charge of raising a child?  Children don't magically make people responsible.



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175,776 Once I was in a Christian prayer group that my friend's father runs out of his house. I've known them since I was 9, so it's not weird being around when she's not there. Once the subject went to dating it was obvious by their lecturing tones and pointed language that they were trying to get me to agree to "save myself for marriage." Yeah, a little late.

Still this Brazilian woman came outright and started talking to me about looking for a nice Christian man and to get him approved by all the Christians in my life so I could have a nice, wholesome, Christian marriage and live happily ever after.

It was funny because she said "You don't want to go through dating a bunch of people in life, do you?"

In my mind I said, "That's exactly what I want to do!"



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175,775 News flash: Planned Parenthood has been forbidden from using taxpayer monies for abortions for decades.



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175,774 Please get one thing straight-Most  Republicans are not against abortions or against women's rights.THEY JUST DON'T WANT THE GOVERNMENT TO PAY FOR YOUR ABORTION.If you want to kill your baby feel free - it is a free country and you have the choice - but don't expect the American tax payers to pay for it.



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175,773 I'm embarrassed at how fat I've become.



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175,772 Loads of people in America realize that the air-tight, capitalist, corrupt, discriminatory, white-supremacist, conservative, self-sustaining system is what's wrong with this country. Now what can we actually do about it? I'm pretty sure most people who are poor would hoard their money and turn corrupt if they had the chance. So how do we actually fix anything? America is so far gone down the hole of fucked. We were even founded on rivers of blood...I guess in a cosmic way we deserve it



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175,771 What is "Pro-Choice"? It means you want to kill unborn babies. What kind of abominable person would kill unborn babies???? Really!!!

And the justification is what? Oh, you like to party and having a baby at home would be inconvenient. So in your view it's quite reasonable to have the baby sliced into little pieces.

Our society so easily overlooks how barbaric we are!



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175,770 I can't control my feelings when I talk to you. I want to hate you but I can't. Even through text I cry.



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175,769 Trump: "My SCOTUS nominee may try to overturn Roe v. Wade."
ok so if that doesn't get anyone who is a democrat, male or female who believes in choice into the voting booth, or a GOTV rally, then just sit at home, put on your aluminum foil hat,and play with yourself, because you are not a democrat, you are a DINO. Party or Bust/Party or Trump



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175,768 A tornado rips through a town killing 3 people in a family of 4 sparing a small child.

A police officer states on the news that God's grace was with this family because the child wasn't killed.

Are you kidding me? God lets 3 people die but spares a child and you Christians think God is merciful? I just don't get it!



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175,767 I'm sorry, my love.  I really do care for you.  Those words I said when we stood together, on that island. I meant them.  Forever together.  You are in my heart.  But if be a fool and a liar if I said you're the only one there.  Yes, you caught me.  And yes, emotionally bonding to someone is just as bad. But I have.  Had, actually.  I can lie to everyone, even you, even myself, but I love her. I love her romantically, unconditionally, and fully.  As I love you.  Explaining that, now that is a challenge. You have this concept of a finite value of love.  That it is quantifiable, and that the only way to have it is to have all or none.

You damn idiot.  If it was finite then my ex would have kept all of it.  Love is infinite.

I've only fucked her once.  That was years ago.  I've loved her for several years before you.  I've made love to her since.  She loves me too. We understand each other's concept of love and romance.  She's married too. We just waited too late to explore it.

Don't mistake my love for her as a lack of it for you.  I'd die for you, if I needed to.  I chose to marry you.  To love you.

I wouldn't change a thing about that.



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175,766 743--- you've got to be kidding me.



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175,765 My puppy is literally the only thing that keeps me hanging on



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175,764 God damn, I let you push my buttons again. No more you psychotic woman!  

I've blocked you and I am ready to move forward and grow.  I'd hope the same for you but I'm pretty sure you'll repeat your pathetic cycles until you die.



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175,763 The closer I get to telling my wife I'm divorcing her, the nicer I am to her. This is by design. I'm bending over backwards for her and giving her so much attention.

I want it to really sting when I leave.



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175,762 It completely disturbs me when a kid gets sick and the parents ask people to pray for their child.

No! Get medical advice. Do research. Find second opinions.

But asking people to pray for your child???? What the hell is that supposed to do?  It's one thing to pretend God exists at Christmas time so you can get presents. But when your child is sick, drop the fantasy and focus on getting your child well again!



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175,761 That guy is right. I plug a 21 year old heroin addict quite frequently and she is really cute. when money gets tight she will literally do anything for it. ANYTHING. haha, I hope my wife never finds out.

Or maybe I should just get my wife hooked on it...



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175,760 The heroin epidemic has made it possible for any guy to find a girl needing money for a fix. Many are attractive 20-somethings with tight bodies and smooth below turning 3-hole tricks for 50. Be nice to them and treat them with kindness and sometimes they play for free.

M/60



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175,759 I always speak my mind. I make a point of always being polite about it. I don't resort to immature name calling (like others do). I state my opnion and then allow others to state theirs.

Six times I've been threatened with arrest. For having an opinion.

In one of those cases a person called the police and said I posted something on Facebook about how I don't support the town budget. He wanted the police to arrest me.

This is America?



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175,758 Sometimes you'll fuck a girl, and then you fuck her again.  And maybe again a little while later.  If you do this, your balls will ache a bit.  It hurts, but it's the best hurt ever.



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175,757 I always have to restrain myself from laughing when I hear someone talk about the tyranny of political correctness.

Seriously?  The tyranny of political correctness?  You have no idea what tyranny looks like.

I always imagine that the people who fart out of their mouths about that are probably the first to start crying when someone calls them out on their bullshit.  These are not the people who are thankful when you tell them they've been an asshole or if they're overweight.



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175,756 Can we be honest? People want medical marijuana to be approved in their state so they can legally get high. That's the long and short of it.



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175,755 People constantly embarrass themselves on Facebook.



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175,754 My wife's ass has doubled in size this year. She refuses to admit it. She still squeezes into her leggings. It's a bit embarrassing.



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175,753 200 yen is like 2 bucks.



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175,752 I went to Japan on a business trip. I was really tired when I walked from the elevator to my room and while I was opening the door I felt a tap on my shoulder. I was shocked, I didn't even know anyone was there. When I turned around it was a woman. She said, "Let's have sex now. 200 yen." I was terrified but she came into my room and took her clothes off while I stood there shocked. Then my dick took over and I fucked her hard and fast. When she left I took a shower. I came inside her and everything. I was exhausted but I didn't get any sleep that night. I won't be tellng my wife this story.



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175,751 I rode my bike through the old ally. The same old people were there. I put my face up to an opening in the fence and I saw my old garden. Everything was grown over, sort of like no one was really tending to it. The house sort of looked like it was a little neglected as well. Such a pretty little house. Sometimes I wish I could give that place a big hug.



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175,750 I want to leave, but the guilt makes me frozen. I have loved him 5 years, but we grew to be very different people. I don't fit him, and he doesn't fit me...maybe in some ways, but we are bored woth each other and frustrated sexually...no sex for a year or more. We have tried. The problem is he is very sick and needs someone to lean on. I would always help him, but I don't want to fake this anymore. When he is well I will go.



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175,749 My family doesn't believe in psychological disorders, so I have never been to a doctor for that. They are from the third world where everyone has it so bad, so my problems don't even exist to them. I have crippling self esteem issues. I'm a perfectionist so no matter how good I look it's never good enough. I also chew my nails when I'm stressed, and now it seems like that is all the time. I also am pretty sure I have OCD, I avoid cracks on sidewalks, I wash my hands twice when I use the restroom, I clean my hair and body twice when I shower, and so much more. I just wish there was something I could do or someone I could talk to - because this is really ruining my life.



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175,748   Since we are now divorced, I could rant and rave about all of the negative characteristics that our relationship embodied. It would be immature of me to say that you were the only messed up one here because I brought my own crap to the table as well and it takes two people , more often than not to run a once beautiful thing into the ground. But, let me say this, since you've been gone;
1) my business is doing great now!

2) I can see my kids more frequently and at random intervals.

3) I am reclaiming my once shelved social life.

4)I am starting to make GOALS again. I'd forgotten how since I was with you.

5) I am feeling hopeful about the future and enjoying the present again!

6) I am actually getting all of the exercise I need now since it was nearly impossible to do that with you around.

7)I feel happy most of the time instead of just some of the time.

8) I don't need to have a significant "other" in my life now. I no longer fear being alone.

9) I will be renewing my passport very soon so I can make another trip to Europe in a month of so.

10)I have another trip planned for Mexico later in the year.

11) there will be plenty of camping, bike touring and backpacking this summer.

12) I could name a few other positive things here, but I am finding that the good FAR outweighs the bad.

So, THANK YOU  for leaving, it truly was a gift!



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175,747 Sanders beat Clinton in West Virginia by a huge margin.

Yet they both received the same number of delegates.

The American democratic process is a fucking joke.



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175,746 I've been married for six years now. Sex is but a memory at this point. I was talking to my spouse and they asked me "what's your greatest fantasy?" I kind of brushed it off and then they fell asleep. I do love them, but my greatest regret in life is not having sex with more people. So my true answer would be "my fantasy is being single." I can't bring myself to divorce them, and I couldn't cheat either so I just have to be OK with only having had sex with three people in my life. All I have is my dreams, where I cavort about and do whatever (and whoever) I want.

The moral of the story? Don't get married until you're 50. No one has business getting married young.



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175,745 im in that miserable part of a break up where it's been crappy for a couple of years, and now it's finally over because he's met someone else. we were doomed, i knew this, but still you're never prepared.  its only been a few days he said, since her met her online i think,  but i can't stay close and know about it, and not knowing whats going on is too hard also. so here is what i want to say, but i won't. i don't know i have some crazy ego thing i think, that i don't want to part permanently with his thinking of me as a bitch and himself the victim, as he did with his ex before me.

the truth is, sometimes i want to leave him with the haunting echo ego blows to his pathetic ego, but again, i guess the image i want for myself takes the lead. so here goes. here are the things i want to say as my last words to him but won't
1. you never made me cum but maybe five times in 10 years.. yup, that's right. had you fooled, didn't i? it never would have worked to have been truthful with you, so i took satisfaction in not having satisfaction, and you never having a clue. at first i loved making you feel like a grand guy in bed, i knew you needed the boost and i loved giving it to you.  but eventually you had such  a huge ego about how you made me cum. and you think you are so so smart. ha! and yes your penis is small. it's embarrassingly so. short and stubby like you.
2. you are an abuser. emotionally and physically. i should have called the cops on you so many times. i pray for and apologize to whoever comes after me that i didn't. you think you were this way with your ex because she was such a bitch, and you think the same of me, but no, it's you. you possess a pathology for verbal and physical violence that is deeply in your hard wire.
3. you can woo her and all the flattery and so forth, but someday the mask will fall. she will see your speeding rage behind the wheel of a car. the cruel impatience and sadistic pleasure you get out of emotionally punishing the person who loves you. you are who you are, you twisted fuck!
4.you're boring. all you can do is talk about yourself, your constant babble about how you are doing at your job is nauseating. you repeat yourself over and over and your insecurity is NOT sexy nor intriguing.  i hope the new girl is ready to feed your ego constantly as i did. at least i only saw you a few hours a day. i can't imagine sharing a life with your narcissistic rhetoric.
5. eventually your hairy back, stinky bald head, and bad breath, and your messiness dirtyness in the house,  will again be part of who you are everyday. you will pour it on for awhile, but you are a disregarding slob.
6. you are a sad, twisted cruel abusive little man. no matter how much money you make or how "successful" you are in your field. this is who you are. you are unfit really, to be anyone's husband and certainly anyone's father. you are character defective because you think everything is someone else fault. sadly, this keeps you from the flourishing of any single one of your good qualities or your inherent sensitive nature. such a shame.
7. your driving is reckless and you cannot control your temper, and the things that temper allows you to do. again, you will put on the mask for awhile, but eventually when you have her , your asshole behind the wheel will definitely emerge. i pray for her safety, and any children you might have. and that goes for in general, not just for driving. this is why i ceased being able to trust you...in anything! you made me so afraid.
8. i have no one to blame, for the pain of separation i am presently feeling, but myself. i stayed for all this. what does that say about me? i often ask myself in the mirror. i don't know, but i know it isn't good. i pray for self awareness and healing.



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175,744 Today my girlfriend and I talked for almost three hours about different things happening today and our future. We talked about if we had allowances and how we would teach our children about finances and being responsible with their money, instilling strong values within them and talked about her giving me blowjobs and about attitude during sex.. The topic came up after we were talking about birth control and me probably getting a vasectomy after we are done having children and her concern that I could possibly lose my sex drive.

We reminisced about some of our sexual encounters.. How we had sex in her sorority house multiple times. Like the time that we snuck into the bathroom on a saturday morning while most of the girls were sleeping and she kneeled on the floor and blew me. Then I set her on the sink counter and finished there. Or how sometimes I would finger her and she would give me a handjob while her roommate was like 8 feet away sleeping in bed... or talking about that time that we went off looking for a handicapped bathroom at a baseball game to have sex in, but were unable to find, haha. She mentioned how she blew me at my parents house upstairs in the guest room while they were away for a brief bit, and I told her how that blowjob was absolutely amazing. I told her that because she kept on sucking and just started swallowing when I was cumming it was the best blowjob ever..

Then we started talking about how we were going to have sex this weekend, her joking about her vagina going to be sore. Talking about oral and what feels good for her and me casually bringing up her blowjob skills and saying that if I were doing something poorly I would want to know because I want to improve and be better. I said I hoped that she would think the same. I asked her if she would want to know, saying that of course nobody wants to hear that they're doing a bad job, but that we can choose to look at it as an opportunity to improve.

And she actually opened up to me. She engaged me and opened up to me about giving me blowjobs, of all topics. We started talking about her feeling comfortable and possibly improving her skills and she started looking up articles on her own. She must have been reading through at least 5 articles about giving blowjobs and then said that I should just send her an article that really resonates with her.
-I WAS FLOORED.

I literally could not believe what was happening. I told her that I agreed with some of the points of articles with the idea that I want more eye contact, spit, a more fun attitude about it, variety in technique, and most of all a partner who is engaging me.

Given her past feelings about being used in relationships and difficulty trusting others, the conversation we had alone today was amazing. She was so open and vulnerable with me it just fills me up.

-Heck, I would trade sex for the rest of my life for conversation like this every day with her and for her attitude to be like this. I hope this continues.

P.S.

I'm the young college graduate people told to run from this girl. So this is my update: our relationship continues to grow and improve.

My advice to others: live intentionally.



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175,743 To the women who were dumped without warning or explanation:

He flirted with you.  He courted you.  After a few dates the time seemed right and you had sex with him.  Since then, dead silence.

A one night stand is not your style.  You feel used.  Hurt.  What happened?  These are possibilities to consider.

1) He disliked the odor or appearance of your genitalia.  He dare not say this to your face because that kind of rejection is extremely painful.  Better to just vanish so that's what he did.

2) You gave oral sex (which he craves).  At the conclusion you spit.  He expected you to swallow his semen and feels rejected.  In his mind a prostitute spits but a lover always swallows.

3) He came too soon and knows you didn't come at all.  He's so embarrassed by his failure to pleasure you that he dare not try again. He won't even call for fear you will belittle him.

It's not your fault.  This turn of events was caused by an insecure man who doesn't know how to communicate feelings.  He runs from adversity rather than talk it through and work it out.  In the long run you are better off without him.

M, old enough to understand such things



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175,742 Very little goes over my head. Just because I don't show my reaction, doesn't mean I've been thwarted. The best part, I think, is when you so subtly chuckle and pat yourselves on the back for making a funny. Garsh, you are just way too smart for me. Who would ever guess you meant that as a personal stab? Oh! To glimpse your brilliance.



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175,741 I am beginning to actually hate you.  I don't think you can tell.



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175,740 When I die, I hope my lover is beside me.

Yes, my beautiful wife, I killed myself to give you everything.   My beautiful wife, you are a great mother, but you suck terribly as a wife.



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175,739 People assume that I voted YES on everything during a town budget referendum because I'm a parent with children in the schools. Meanwhile, I voted so I could find out what our town is trying to sneak through under the line items so that I could vote down unnecessary spending. Im tired of people equating more spending with a better education. Our town is like my ex husband. Spend money when you don't have it on things you don't need.



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175,738 I have a friend. She's 53. Divorced. She has a son in college. The father can't pay because he's a starving artist type. So it's all up to her. Except she just got fired.

So what does she do? She calls up the husband of a mutual friend. The mutual just died a few months ago. So sad. She's gone. (Cancer). Which means her husband technically is once again single. And this divorced broke women asks him out to dinner. Bet he's getting a free blow job out of it.

It's a dog eat dog world out there for single women. They have no morals. Going after a guy whose wife just died. Man oh man.

Why am I so pissed? Because she beat me to him.



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175,737 Wait. I don't understand. Why does everyone care so much about the Kardashians?



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175,736 You are a drug addict it is unfortunate. You were my person and really the only person I had. My dad wants to move away and our daughter is all I have left now. I love you so much and know you are a great person but drugs and alcohol make you different. I'm tired and want to give up maybe my dad should just take my daughter and I should just kill myself. There is no family and my heart is absolutely shattered. I'll never be the same. la tristesse durera toujours



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175,735 I used to alwasy worry about E.D. and not being able to get it up when it came time to 'get down' on sexy time. I had a long dry spell so I masturbated furiously night and day just to make sure it was still working. then the flood gates opened, I was having sex with Ɖ' different girls it was nice at first, but I didn't like any of them. one of them i had a relationship with years ago and broke it off because she was kind of gross...but seeing as I hadn't had sex in a couple of years...I would have stuck my junk in anything, then one day. I could even get hard, I thought i would have freaked, but i didn't, it was actually nice because I could wear loose pants no underwear and not worry about getting an embarrassing boner. I thought jeez, I guess I'll need the blue pills in-case I meet someone I like, I stopped masturbating and everything. After a few weeks things started to 'wake up' again, I guess I just needed to stop the excessive masturbation and fucking girls I had no interest in. But it was nice to look at a hot girls crotch and not get a raging hard on. I had so much focus on other stuff.

48M



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175,734 @730 - One of a few things can happen.  1) BAD - Your Wife's former girlfriend takes her away from you.  2) GOOD - You manage to be the "meat" in a hot lesbian sandwich. 3) Neutral - Nothing bad happens and she leaves after a short time with you.

Two out of three ain't bad!!!



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175,733 Parents, make sure you always for YES YES YES on the school budget.  Because that's what stupid mindless people like you are meant to do.



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175,732 I don't know who to will my estate to.  I was going to leave everything to my brother, but his ungrateful spoiled bitch wife disowned me recently and I don't want her to see a dime of it.  I could just leave it all to my boyfriend.  That would go over well.



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175,731 Oh man! Now I've seen it all. We hear in the news how kids are getting fatter. Obesity among our youth is a real issue.

Now I see the impact. In my daughter's high school, half the cheerleaders are fat cows. That was impossible when I was in high school. A fat gird would never make the squad. But these days, I guess the schools have no choice. So many girls are overweight. If they weren't allowed on the team, there wouldn't be enough cheerleaders.

Sad.



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175,730 My wife's former lesbian lover is coming to stay with us for the summer.

This is getting complicated.

They dated for 10 years. Then they split up and both married men. That's how I entered the picture.

By the way, these women aren't trailer trash whores. They are very educated, very successful financial executives.

But here it is 15 years later. My wife's lesbian lover has gone through two marriages. She's depressed. A year ago she reached out to my wife. They reconnected as friends. They've been talking in the background. I don't think there has been any sexual activity between them. But then again, I'm not watching my wife 24/7.

Now the woman wants to come live with us for a few months.

I'm not sure what to do. Very odd circumstances.



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175,729 Why do people say such stupid things????

"If you don't vote, you aren't allowed to complain."

Says who? You moronic twits?

Do you actually believe America works that way? If the rest of us don't do what you do, then we forfeit our right to say anything?

Keep dreaming assholes.



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175,728 Apparently Moore Adjusters needs your facebook to hold an interview with you.  That's a little bit of discrimination isn't it? You know, if you don't have one?



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175,727 I met an older Danish man at the bar the other night. He was there by himself just like me, so we struck up a conversation. Soon we start talking about things like spirituality and the fabric of life, ambition and how things are not how they used to be, death and dying, what we thought of the world and what we want to do with our lives. It wasn't a heavy conversation, it was just critical. Deep. We both remarked how funny it was that we were both able to slip into such a conversation with a stranger.

I noticed the wedding band on his finger, and we eventually spoke about his daughters and how his traveling affects them. Even though he's 42 and there's a 20 year age difference between us, I found myself becoming slightly attracted to this man's intelligence, softness, and openness to change. Even the crinkle of his eyes seemed endearing. I haven't met many older people at all that are so open to having a new perspective of the world. I noticed he wasn't trying to hit on me at all during this conversation we were having, but that was something I liked since it made it seem more genuine.

Around the end of our conversation we both spoke about how we wish we could stay in contact somehow, even though we both knew it wasn't realistic at all. He had to be on the other side of the country the next morning for work, which was how he ended up in my city to begin with. As he gathered his things to leave, he asked me for a kiss. It was just a causal peck on the lips, but afterward I was glad that I'll never see him again. We would have ended up having an affair.



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175,726 Letting go isn't as easy as it sounds.  Especially when you thought you found "the one". But, after much reflection and introspection, it was clearly not a healthy place to be.  When we become entrenched in the manipulative ways of another, we've lost already.  When the things you used to enjoy or spending time alone to recharge are no longer important or allowed , it's time to get out. Codependent people bring you down to their level.  Insecure people will try to continually control you , even from afar if you allow it.

I wanted to spend the rest of my life with this person, but with each passing day it just became so obvious that even another five years was an impossibility.  Baby, thanks for being the escape artist here, you had me so buffaloed in this relationship that I was just content to be your lapdog even though I knew it was a slow miserable death.

I WILL give myself permission to be free and happy again. Please now stay away and never contact me again.  I can't afford the cost emotionally.  

Be free. Be happy. Be blessed.

It was fun while it lasted until we used one another up.



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175,725 I'm much happier being divorced than married. Some marriages just aren't to be.



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175,724 About ten years ago I went on a trip to Las Vegas with my wife and some of our married couple friends.  Completely great time.  The women would hang out together and so would the men.  The third night we were there, we all got shitfaced drunk and started wandering the strip in pairs and small groups.  Me and a buddy of mine went into a strip club and sat down.  A cute blonde walked past me and, completely drunk, I grabbed her ass.  She turned and looked at me, grabbed my arm, and pulled me into a private room.  Long story short, I ended up having a drunk threesome with two strippers.  Probably the greatest night of my life, but the next day I got a message on my phone from my credit card company - there were $1200 in suspicious charges from a strip club.  In a drunken mess I had given my credit card to the strippers to pay for the room for three hours.  (I told you it was the greatest night of my life.)    Holy shit, I was panicking.  It's not like my wife wouldn't notice this on the credit card statement.  But under the listed charges was the question, "If these are fraudulent transactions, log into your account."  I couldn't believe I was doing it, because I've always been honest.  But it was my only option.  I logged in, told the credit card company that the transactions were fraudulent, and the amount got wiped off my bill.  The downside is that I had to tell my wife that "somehow, our credit card information got stolen!"  We had to spend the next few days being careful where we used the card, but it was a small price to pay.  My friend who saw me taken away by the stripper kept his mouth shut when I told him, "Don't tell my wife, but I spent $80 of our money on lap dances.  She'll be furious with me if she found out."



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175,723 I can tell my wife isn't physically attracted to me anymore.  It's in the way she kisses me.  But I don't think I'm physically attracted to her anymore, either.  And this is funny because I can look at her and tell she's a very attractive woman.  She occasionally gets random, creepy men telling her how attractive she is.  Maybe physical attraction is like pizza.  I love pizza, but if I had it every day, morning, noon, and night for 20 years, I'd get bored with it even if I know it's great.  But on the plus side, we're best friends and we know we can't live without each other.  I couldn't imagine my world without the beautiful woman right next to me who I'm not physically attracted to anymore.



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175,722 No matter what the circumstances of the breakup, it still fucking stings when you see your ex's engagement announcement on Facebook.



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175,721 Someone stole my husband credit card information then went to a strip club and charge 3,000 on it.  The credit card call my husband and cancel the card and send him a new one . The funny part about there is no nice strip clubs in the area (Covington ) there are only holes in the wall , obviously this idiot doesn't have very good taste on woman , those places are well know for having crack heads and not very attractive women some even missing their teeth .



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175,720 People over 60 call Chinese people orientals. The rest of us call them Asians. I'm quite glad people over 60 are dying off, along with the word oriental.



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175,719 You want to know who my wife is? For years, she has been a selfish cold hearted aloof person. Certainly towards me. And to our children. My wife thinks she's just cool. She thinks acting uncaring and distant gives her class.

Her group of friends are the same. They egg each other on. They used the sisterhood to justify the selfish behavior on all of their parts.

So the other day there's a message on the answering machine. It's from my wife's very best friend. Her father died. She's crying on the message.

When my wife gets home, I play the message. My wife does nothing.

My wife said that over the next few hours she received half a dozen texts from her best friend, again pointing out her father died.

My wife still did nothing except complain to me how her best friend is annoying her.

I said, "But your best friend's father died. Shouldn't you call her? It sounds like she needs to talk to someone."

Response, "It's not my problem. She's being needy. She'll get over it."

Hard to believe these two women are best friends. But I guess that's their world of oh-so-cool bitches.



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175,718 Today is their one year anniversary. I want to celebrate by throwing darts at a picture of his face.



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175,717 i have recently met an online dream. She is younger, very hot and has a beautiful pussy. I love to watch her as she gets me hard, and I love to make her cum. I want this to last for a long time, one day we will meet. When we do, watch out because its going to be one hell of phenomenal time.



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175,716 I hate my boss with the fury of a thousand suns. He is such a dick and goes out of his way to make others miserable for no good reason.  I have a plan where I'm going to plant a fair amount of heroin in his car then call the police and report him. I'm going to say I saw him selling the heroin to a couple if teen girls from his car. Since our place of business is about two blocks away from a high school it would be feasible that my boss could be selling heroin to teens.  If my plan works I will have so much joy to see him hauled off to jail and him losing his job. Fuck you, asshole! You deserve every bit of pain coming to you.



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175,715 Untapped potential. So i was banging my girlfriend on the couch, and when i leaned back to take a break, she then furiously gave me a hand job.....i shot my load over my head, like 5 feet past and onto the floor. Hav'nt done that before or since, but it goes to show, you can surprise yourself!



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175,714 When I was growing up, I knew four kids who died. All separate incidents. A boy on my street died when his house burned down. He was a friend of mine and my age, 9. My mother told me he moved away. It wasn't until years later that I found out he died in the fire.

There was a girl who died two blocks away. We were both 12 at the time. She was in my class. Same thing. A house fire.

There was another boy who was climbing up the side of a step cliff when he fell to his death. He was 13.

And then there was a girl. She was 15. She was visiting in a big city. She pushed the button for the elevator. The doors open. She walked in. But there was no elevator. She fell down the shaft and died. Her family was right there and saw the whole thing. I really liked her. I wanted her to be my girlfriend. Never happened.

For some reason I've been thinking about all four of these kids. Weird, because it's 40 years later. I think I'm subconsciously trying to deal with my own mortality. Death will come for me soon. I guess it makes the idea easier on me knowing some of my childhood friends have already been through the ordeal. Who knows, maybe they will meet me on the other side. That's not a terrible idea at all. I'd look forward to seeing them again.



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175,713 Craigslist has nothing.  I am looking for work and nada.  I did a temp job but no luck since.  At this time last year there were more jobs up.  I don't know what to do



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175,712 After spending the first 6.5 hours of my Monday sending out resumes, I'm now ready to start working!



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175,711 A rather promiscuous woman I know once told me she worked in a nail salon and spa making $700 a day in tips.

I know another woman who worked in a nail salon (no spa) where she made $30 a day in tips.

The only way the first woman could have earned $700 a day in tips is if she was giving handjobs to men in the spa.

Makes sense now.



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175,710 So my husband created a fake Facebook profile to use a bunch of dating apps. I caught it logged into his phone but he adamantly denied that it was him. (1. bullshit, it was on your passcoded phone, 2. bullshit, you've cheated before.)
Well, I let it go (because honestly, I'm saving up money to leave him anyway) and about a month later I created a different Facebook and tried to add 'him' as a friend. My request was denied. That's how I knew it. I sent that profile a message saying 'You're breaking my heart'. It was marked 'read' and later that day my husband deleted the fake profile and his actual profile. Maybe that did it. It's been two weeks and nothing. We'll see, I guess. I cannot wait. One year and we will be 100% debt free and I will tell him that I knew it was him all along and we will either go to counseling or we will go to get a divorce.



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175,709 Some guys are cool. They've got their act together and have great confidence. It's an aphrodisiac for me. I'd consider fucking a guy like this.

More often though, there are guys who go for the mercy fuck approach. They tell me how messed up their lives are. They complain about work, and their failed relationships. They paint themselves as someone to be pitied. Their goal is to make me feel so bad for them that I'll say, "There there, you poor thing. Let me spread my legs, so you can stick your penis inside me. Hopefully it will make you feel better."

Pathetic right?

But you know what, I fall for it. I've given out way more mercy fucks, than fucks with cool self confident men.



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175,708 Cats don't like me. The feeling is mutual. I'll be at someone's house, a place I've never been before. And the cat, who I've never seen before, will start hissing at me.

I think cats talk among themselves and discuss who the hate-able people are. I'm obviously on the list.



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175,707 poster 87
I had the same problem .When you feel a panic attack coming and you start hyperventilating- sit down close your mouth and breath through your nose. You are filling your body with too much air. Breath and slowly blow the air out until your lungs are empty before you breath in again. Anther method is to breath into a paper bag and  breath in the same air.
Google breathing exercises and do it. That is all you need to control this.



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175,706 I haven't read Harry Potter past book 4 (or seen the movies past that point), but I feel like I'm starting to understand horcruxes.

Put shortly, I've put pieces of my heart into 4 different men, to varying degrees of intensity and in different respects. Now that the 4th and most recent wants to love me fully, I almost want to croon: "What do  you want from me darling, do you want my love? You'll have to find it first!" Like a witch from that 8-bit videogame where Minnie Mouse gets kidnapped and you have to find the jewels to open the door.

I never thought I'd be one of those people that pretends to be with someone but only while they're in their arms. Or the type to hug someone with a blank face on the other side of their shoulder. Or to have someone look lovingly into my eyes as I sext someone else, and feel baseline guilt for it. None of them matter to me more than trivially, so even if I picked one I wouldn't be satisfied.

I need to cut them all off and start over.



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175,705 I am oddly attracted to Chris Christie. Every time I see him I get all hot and bothered. Hmm...



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175,704 I can't help but imagine that we will somehow know one another again. It might be two years, it might be ten, I don't know.   I do know however that you and I will meet again, we're lovers, even though right now we aren't together.  It kills me not being with you , but I have to accept that right now.  

I just wish I'd been able to recognize my baggage before things got all messed up.  There's no doubt we both have major issues , but I still believe in love and that someday , somewhere, we will meet again.  

I hate sleeping alone in OUR bed not knowing where you are.  I miss you. I'm still obsessed about you. I'd take you back instantly though I'm pretty sure you hate me right now.....

BTW, thanks for reaching out to my mom yesterday, that shows real caring right there.



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175,703 I'm 45.  When I hit my late 30s I had enough experience to spot the women who would fuck me.  I could recognize "slut face" in an instant.  A few times, I hired a young woman because I could see the slut face on her and thought she'd make the office interesting.  It's the only reason I would date a woman decades younger than me, if I could look at her and tell she'd fuck me.



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175,702 Unpleasant, unwelcome thoughts about my future haunt me... Decades of an empty bed, no children, no one to share my triumphs with, no one to make it better with a hug when I am sad, no one to laugh with, no one to make happy memories with, no hand to hold as I walk through life... just an empty space where you could have been.

Maybe I will be lucky enough to grow old as your friend, to see your dreams come true, to see you find happiness. It's not the way I would have wished it, but you will be happy.

What saddens me most is that I don't think I will get that chance, that I don't even deserve to be your friend, and you will no longer be in my life at all.



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175,701 I'm in love with a man. He is my soulmate. But I can't stand his adult daughter. What am I going to do?  she's a manipulative cunt



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175,700 I met this older guy at a work event a while back. I was 22, he was maybe 45. I wasn't into him and he wasn't my type, but he kept asking me out. Eventually I said yes.

The day he came to pick me up, I was waiting for him in my apartment. I lived on a very tall hill and I had a wide view of the city. I saw his car coming up my street. He parked and checked something on his phone. His GPS maybe? Then he put it down but didn't get out of the car. It looked like he was looking for something in his pocket. But then I caught a better view off him through his sunroof and to my horror, I saw he was jerking off. I must have made a noise or gasped because my roommate came over and looked too and said, "Wait, is that the guy you're going out with?" We watched with disgust, waiting to see what he would do next. He finished, wiping himself with his shirt before getting out of the car. I met him at the bottom of the stairs. He presented me with a Family Dollar bouquet of roses that I snatched from him and threw in the street screaming about what a disgusting piece of shit he was. He was mortified and slunk away without even defending himself. He ended up quitting his job over it because everyone we worked with found out about it.

I understand men do that before dates. But I can't imagine why he just couldn't have jerked off at home before he came to get me? Who does that???????



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