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187,299 deleted



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187,298 That office mate I mentioned actually reminds me of several exes. Ugh.



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187,297 I would date a fat woman over a skinny woman any time. Fat girls rule!!



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187,296 I was once 30 pounds underweight, malnourished, and next to death.

I still had my turkey neck.

Fuck me, right?



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187,295 I guess you never heard the term "skinny fat" , just because a person looks slim doesn't equal a lower percent of fat.  The scale doesn't tell you exactly how much percent of fat, water , muscle you hold .



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187,294 Everybody says it gets better, but my life has gotten worse and will never recover.  Maybe I should speak up, or just wait for death.



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187,293 I missed you terribly while I was gone...now I feel like I can breath AGain.



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187,292 The higher percentage of body fat, the higher percentage of a call back booty call.



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187,291 Look inside your shirt and say hello to your boobs for me.



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187,290 What's up with all of these people jumping on that 'being thick' bandwagon. Having a higher percent of body fat doesn't guarentee you more aesthetic  appeal than someone who has a lower percent of body fat. You women are all equally appealing! Don't let others break you for not looking how the media wants you to look, skinny or thick.



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187,289 I feel you, my brother. They're like a drug.

There's a novel "Gentlemen Prefer Blondes"
followed by sequel "Gentlemen Marry Brunettes".

I'm still waiting for "Gentlemen are Scared of (but Still Desperately Want to Fuck) Redheads."

I'd crawl over broken glass to be in bed with her just one more time



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187,288 If a man presumes that an unacquainted woman in public minding her own business might like a date with him, he can be construed as a "creep" who is "harassing" her exercising his "male privilege" under "rape culture".  You'd better woman up and do the asking out yourself, dear.



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187,287 When I masturbate I think about fucking my ex-wife. She's incredibly hot and fantastic in bed. Too bad she's batshit crazy and mean so I had to divorce her.



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187,286 If I could back the clock up 24 hours, I would choose you instead.



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187,285 So no to Kathy Griffin even though it was fake, but yes to Trump slamming down CNN because it's fake... This is all so confusing!



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187,284 The conversation kind of went like this. At Christmas time my wife said her sister is having a barbeque on 4th of July. I said, you mean your nasty sister who says mean things about me and so many others, uhm, I won't be attending.

My wife has brought up the barbeque every few weeks since then. Each time I said I won't be going.

Today my wife asked when we will be leaving to make the long drive to her sister's on July 4th. For the umpteenth time I said I'm not going.

My wife acted shocked. She said I have to go. My wife already told her sister I was coming. She said I can't back out now "at the last minute".

The last minute? I've said I wasn't going for 6 months. Nothing has changed. I've always said I wasn't going.  My wife chose to ignore me all along, but then acts like I never told her. She threw a hissy fit for me not telling her sooner that I wasn't going..... sigh.

This is why I hate my wife.



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187,283 Nobody likes you.

Everybody hates you.

Guess you should go eat some worms.

and go back to Indiana.



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187,282 I didn't forget. I send you love and happiness.



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187,281 I don't want to go to college. I'm scared.



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187,280 I hate bugs. I freaking hate bugs. This summer is hot and wet. So many bugs. I'm thinking of moving to Arizona to avoid all bugs.



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187,279 If a reasonable man came onto me, I wud say yes. I'm told I'm not unattractive. But it has been a while since I've done anything sexual. I really want to hold onto someone. Hey guys, maybe I've the girl next to you on line at starbucks. Speak up already and ask me out!



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187,278 I am not confident enough to approach a pretty woman. I stick with unattractive women because it's all I feel I deserve. It works out for me though in that unattractive women respond well to my advances. I think they get fewer guys coming on to them, so they readily accept me. In the end, I've slept with many women, but they have all been unattractive. Not complaining. Just an observation.



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187,277 Trump tweets a video of himself taking out CNN, WWF style.  Reporters go insane saying he is promoting violence.

Deep analyses
1.  Trump tweets a video of what is, in effect, a stage play.  He plays his role to rile his fans, CNN plays their role to rile their fans.  In the end, is it fake or real?

2.  Is this a commentary on the Fake News aspect to CNN's butt-hurt attitude towards being 'excluded'?  Is CNN's shock and offense just for show since people are talking about CNN daily for the first time in years?

3.  Was it just a humorous video that included Trump and CNN?

OK, last was not so deep.



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187,276 I am a female in my late 30's and I can't ride a roller coaster without feeling nauseous. It is not a fun time for me.



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187,275 While I never care for clubs and I don't even drink , I known plenty of men over the age of 40 who do the same, they all be out trying to hook up with younger women on their early 20's .  Honestly it doesn't bother me, people can do whatever they want , I'm a female on my late 30's and I still enjoy roller coasters which some people think it's juvenile.



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187,274 On Mondays I go through my Facebook feed and I look at the pictures people post.  There's this subset of women who, in their late 30s and early 40s, are single and seem to be at the club a few times a month with their other single friends.  They're not just sitting at a table or the bar and having a few drinks and enjoying each other's company, they're out dancing and taking selfies and acting like they're 20 years younger.

Sure, it's their lives and they can do what they want, but don't these women ever move on?  Clubbing is something people do in their 20s and maybe into their early 30s.  It's something we grow out of as we get into middle age.  It's almost like their growth is emotionally stunted.



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187,273 I might have let the right one go, while hanging onto the wrong one. I guess I'll know soon enough.



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187,272 We were dancing. Then I brushed your cheek. Then there was nothing to stop us from kissing. It was all over from there. We had no control.

Riders on the storm, riding your beautiful storm, stare deeply into thyself and chestnut eyes, smooches from heaven for your beautiful face.



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187,271 Yes, the bitch is back...



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187,270 I'm wondering if anyone else ever has a feeling, sensation, an impression ( now that I'm writing this, I think, it's more like all three together) that they've lived another lifetime before?



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187,269 Time to get back on that good vibe tip, I know a place.



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187,268 Here is one of women's secrets.  Did you ever have a girl reject you for no reason?  You were sure she liked you but she turned you down when you asked her out?  Sometime women/girls lay claim to guys and tell their friends they're not allowed to date him.  So maybe she really did like you and she was just trying to be a good friend by rejecting you. It wasn't because there was something wrong with you, it was because she couldn't. And maybe it killed her to hurt you. So if she's saying sorry I can't and can't give a reason why, well now you know.



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187,267 I dreamed Death knocked on my grandfather's door. I didn't see him but for his black horse.



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187,266 Lust is a drug that will always leave you wanting more.
Begging for a new high, yet leaving you filled with guilt.



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187,265 My wife got caught having back to back affairs on me, including visiting her new Dom right before her daughter's 16 birthday celebration which she was late for as he needed to ice down her ass after their spanking session.
She complains that everyone is judging her and have no compassion for her situation.
You made your bed, enjoy lying in it



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187,264 My mother is near death. I visit her in the memory care unit of the hospice and sit there watching her breath. She no longer knows who, what, where, etc. I guess my secret is I can't seem to be sad, or emotional. I want to see her stop breathing, for several reasons, but the main reason is she no longer needs to live. She outlasted my father, hers brother,  2 nieces and a drug addict granddaughter.

My main reason is a shitty one, but thats the secret, I'm not telling



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187,263 deleted



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187,262 When all the smiles are out of town
You're falling round and round
You find the Syndrome



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187,261 Don't cover up your emotions and thoughts with movies, tv shows, music or social media. That makes it so much harder to heal those thoughts and problems because it's hidden underneath so much useless shit. I thought I was going crazy. Now I have stopped using instagram on a daily habit and I van finally deal with my problems. Things shouldn't be so hard at 22. Do the right thing guys and deal with these issues now.



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187,260 I have "normal" interests and proclivities. I'm also attracted to things which frighten me. Those things that frighten me are like a raging dangerous river. I will jump into her during a lapse of reason.

My method for coping is to stand next to my phobias. I don't jump in. I stand there and wait for something bad to happen, but nothing happens.

I suppose it is fortunate to be here to question matters of life and death. It isn't over. Blades cut down in the sun. The happy objects leave bread crumbs that may nourish your soul and lead you back to yourself.



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187,259 I hope my homophobic, mysoginistic, racist parents live long enough to see Paul Ryan take away their Medicare so every dime they ever earned will go to long term care. Because those trumpers will never, ever, EVER come live with me. Fuck them.



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187,258 I think nowadays the best anti-theft device for a car is having a stick shift.



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187,257 Mo fuckin crazy as fuck. Citing legal, acting evil, nothing but bad luck.  Her, she's on an island 🌴, she ain't lying, just had it with us. My ol baby boo? Ah, she's fuckin something new, but it ain't love, so it must be lust. Me, I'm chillin, 😎, 'xcept when I'm runnin in 5th, made yah miss, now watch me bust.



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187,256 I'm mostly happy, but sometimes the world exhausts me.  Everyone is so angry and in so much pain. There are some days I feel it all around me like air, and its exhausting to try not to breathe it in.  I just wish we could all be more open and honest.  With each other.  With ourselves.  It would be so soothing and healing. I'm just so tired.



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187,255 I can't believe this. I've had a lot of people tell me I'm a good-looking guy since I was in high school. I can pretty much date any single woman I want, and my job and social life brings all kinds of interesting women into my life.

The sick part is -- the only woman who does it for me anymore is married to someone else.  I know the guy and he's not some asshole who doesn't love her, either, and I know he's got a better job and more money than me.

It's even getting intrusive. I'll be out with a woman who's actually available and she'll start to bore me because she's not as funny and cheerful as my buddy's wife.  It'll annoy me that my date is a blonde and not a redhead.  Or she's too skinny and doesn't have the same luscious tits and ass.

So I'm out with this blonde, and she gets a little put out because of a snag in her stockings. I remember this one time I was out at a nightclub with a bunch of friends, and my buddy's wife tore her black stockings somehow.  She looked down, laughed and said "Punk rock!" and tore the other leg on purpose. Red hair, don't care.

I can't stop imagining what she's like in bed.  They've been married a long time and he's still totally into her, never even talks about other women, it's just My wife this, my wife that.

I wish I could tell her.  I wish I could spend just one night with her.

M/29/single



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187,254 I've always been the type to spew positivity, to say that with enough hard work and research you can accomplish your goals. But recently I've been worried...what if I never dig myself out of this hole of obscurity? What if none of my friends ever make it either? Have I been lying to myself? Was my peak really one random shitty comic...?

I try not to obsess over the views, the likes, but in my line of work I need those for my career to survive. But it's like wherever I go I have some kind of aura that chases people away. I join a conversation and the room goes silent or ignores me. I inherit a thriving club, do my best to be friendly and welcoming and proactive but everyone suddenly stops coming. I kill everything I touch, it seems, so what if my career as an artist was just dead on arrival?



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187,253 I once opened the lid to my bbq grill and there were mice on it nibbling at the cold residue from the last time I grilled. I quickly closed the lid and turned on all the burners. I heard mad scurrying for about 15 seconds and then nothing. I opened the grill again and there was 4 roasting mice. I kind of feel bad about it. But not too bad.



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187,252 Just when you think you will never get over someone and the heartbreak, someone new and wonderful comes along. Great how that works.



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187,251 I keep thinking about having sex with women. Their bodies are so inviting, soft and squishy, always smelling like their natural scent and fruity perfumes. I just want to run my hands through their hair, pin them down, tweak and suck their nipples and go for a dive down under. There's something intoxicating about the slow burn you feel in your pelvis when you're grinding on another girl's sex, and all you feel is friction, sweat, and the urgency to fill the space between your bodies. Ugh, I just masturbated but I keep thinking about how much better it would feel to really get one out, and share a deep, passionate kiss. You know, the post-orgasmic-bliss kiss. It's the best drug on earth.

Oh well. Back to work.

23/F



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187,250 in a current of tears all melted from snow, treading water you can't see below,
living out my truth alone my heart a stone in the river,
my heart it rips, like slime I slip, from arms that don't return my grip.  
on my own this pleasant town to me a desert all around
i laugh i cry they hear no sound doesn't matter
~crying clown ..
a child who smiled and got a frown, and mother's pain it travels down
tired eyes with no tomorrow to swim for through this dawn. the last star fades from wishing on,
come back orange sun, warm my face like a friend
then leave me in the dark again,
no other smile could ease the pain, if ever i could believe again, i'd laugh i'd cry but all in vain. in one more bloody drop of rain ..



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187,249 When my wife is being a bitch I take a Viagra that she doesn't know about and I pound her good and hard for 30-40 mins.
Then she saids "Wow, What has gotten into you?"
I just smile.
She's quite nice to me for a while.



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187,248 I must admit that I thought a certain someone was looking rather handsome at dinner the other night.

I do always much more than enjoy his company.

I'm still sad that I no longer get to see him as often.



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187,247 I feel bad for your new temporary girlfriend. That's what we all were. Members of the temporary girlfriend club. None of us stick around long.



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187,246 "If you could write a suicide note right now, what would it say?"

----------------------

Dear wife. I'm sorry. It was my time to go. Do not worry about money now that I'm gone. I've hidden away $4 million in a bank account. You can have it. Account # 1726387728

----------------------

I hate my wife. All she ever thinks about is money. There is no bank account with $4 million. I made up the account number. Notice I didn't name the bank. She'd spend the rest of her days trying to find it. It will kill her.



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187,245 I'm seeing more and more black people around town. Not ghetto people, they look middle class...but I know what's about to happen. It happened in my hometown (a suburb of Baltimore). First you get a sprinkling of decent, upstanding black people--then a torrent of lolly ghetto ****rs that will utterly destroy and ruin a formerly nice neighborhood in about two years.

I like living here, and I don't want to leave, but I can't go through this twice. Guess it's time to start looking at real estate again.



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187,244 Again, the hardest part
Was letting go, not taking part
You really broke my heart....



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187,243 I did not get much out of my mother in law. She gave me shelf liners for what was to be our final Christmas together (SIL got concert tickets, a Coach purse, and a Cashmere sweater set), and I ended up inheriting two straw hats, but she did, however unintentionally, give me a great gift.

The art of being oblivious. She could CONVINCE someone she did not see anything; when the grass grew to over three feet at the entrance to their neighborhood, she told a resident she "hadn't noticed". When a relative was obviously being snarky and sarcastic she pretended to take it at face value and completely disarmed his performance. It was only after 19 years of careful observation did I learn that it was all fake, but oh, so effective. I mean, how can you argue with someone who will tell you she traveled to Europe, but does not remember a single meal she had when an alt-right yahoo was gunning for a fight?

Thank you, Margaret, It was the most useful gift anyone ever got me. It'll never wear out and fit me PERFECTLY!



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187,242 i can't cope with being ugly



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187,241 I'm in Canberra, Australia's national capital.  (That last bit is a secret to most of the world.)



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187,240 192 I know how you feel. It's hard when you love them so much, but they just can't physically satisfy you for reasons beyond anyone's control. Physical pleasure isn't worth losing a marriage over, though.



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187,239 What if I remain irrelevant forever?



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187,238 I quit dying my hair out pure laziness, I started experimenting with my hair since I was 16 . I been every single color out there including the crazy ones( bright pink, purple, blue) it's nice not to keep worrying about roots and now I can even grow my hair since all the bleaching , dyed was killing my hair.

37 f , with natural dark and wavy hair.



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187,237 I'm only alive because of my dog and my child.



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187,236 I'm ghosting someone who was a very dear friend to me (or so I thought) and now years later she keeps texting/begging me to meet up again. NOPE! She blew me off at any & every turn so she doesn't deserve to be in my life. I was always there for her. It's true you really do find out who your true "friends" are. I will not be hurt again- so see ya!



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187,235 I made it through the week with no money. Nothing in my wallet, $40 in my bank account. I shouldn't have to do this at my age, but it's good to know I still can.



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187,234 I never want to be in a relationship again. They always end badly. Oh sure, every so often you hear about some couple married 60 years. But I'm sensing that's because they were to lazy to end it. Don't fall for the trap. Stay single and free and have a good time without having to pay for her makeup and a zillion other crappy items.



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187,233 The sadness just never goes away.



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187,232 Here goes another exciting round of being the workplace pariah. Big mouth strikes again.



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187,231 I'm in Milwaukee, WI.



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187,230 Being an option is ok if everyone agrees from the beginning to keep it open and then see where it goes.  Once monogamy is established, the option element is supposed to go away. From my personal experience, dating just one person at a time lessens the confusion.  Yes, I've enjoyed polyamory, but after a time it gets tiring and people get their egos bruised.



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187,229 There is nothing wrong with being an option.  Some people are into multiple people, and want to decide the one person to spend their life with.



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187,228 I feel way too much and see the micro expressions of these people



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187,227 Three days ago, I walked away from a relationship after seeing all the signs that I was mostly an option and not a priority. It was one of the most empowering moments to realize that I'm worth a lot more than I ever thought and if the person I'm with doesn't have strong boundaries, they'll never respect mine.

I spent my life in other relationships where I let them whittle me away to almost nothing.  Fuck that.  Never again.  Show up,be present and work on yourself just like I have.



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187,226 The last 24 hours has been very enlightening to me. I'm all I've got & that's alot.



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187,225 I just got an anonymous email that a previous sexual partner had tested for a STD...seeing as I got tested with my last partner twice before we had unprotected sex that she cheated on me at some point.



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187,224 I picked the wrong person to work with.



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187,223 I'm in Philadelphia. I wonder where you guys are.



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187,222 Waters creep upward
Stained glass panes illuminate
Songs outside my door



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187,221 I am so alone and so lonely.  I hope it won't always be this way.



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187,220 At 46 years old, when I see a woman in a short dress bending over in front of everybody, I know it's an oversexed exhibitionist. Then I try to talk to her.



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187,219 I worked all day from 7 am to 5 pm in my PJs today.   No time for breakfast or lunch.  Shower at 5 pm, dinner at 7 pm.  I love WFH days.



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187,218 Last night I peed standing up.  It arced.  It was perfect.

I am female.  ROAR.



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187,217 I get bored with a girl after I fuck her.



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187,216 My two sister's are planning my parent's 50th wedding anniversary. I don't want to go. They are a prime example of why people should not stay married for the kids. My mother is a guilt tripping ass and my father has ocd. When it turned 42 a few years back I realized my mom was at least 80% of the problem. She has rode my fathers ass like a pack mule. I am expected to pay $650.00 toward this party. I just want to write a check and forget about it. I was the one who took the brunt of my fathers rage growing up. Mom was in his ear complaining the whole time. Only late in life did i realize what an asshole she was and how she just drove him. The last time they took a family vacation together I skipped it. I was told its was horrible. I am dreading this. My youngest sister is the worst. She is going to clown me in some way about this event because she can tell I don't give a fuck. She runs her husband like that. I am trying to brace myself for this shit. I am wondering if I am going to end up cussing them out and punching somebody. This may be the incident that becomes the last straw.



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187,215 I am so sick of you.  I'm sick of working with you, I'm sick of being your friend, I'm sick of you barely even TRYING to make things work for anyone but yourself.  You are obsessed with this piece of shit project and you're still sabotaging it yourself!  I thought that you would be good to work with because for all of your faults, you seemed reliable and like the kind of person who would actually work hard and be consistent.  And you know what?  That's true, but at the expense of every other aspect of your life.  And I've realized now that I have friends who can be passionate about their projects and really put the work into them, without putting it before literally every other aspect of their lives.  Fuck you, man.  If it weren't for the money, I'd be out in a heartbeat.



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187,214 I stopped paying for my health insurance, car insurance, and house insurance. That said, it's very liberating not to pay. I think we nave been conned into thinking insurance is necessary. It's a scare tactic. The chances of something going wrong are next to nothing times nothing. Yet all of us pay a fortune to buy insurance. In my case all the insurance was costing me $22,000 per year.  Have I ever recouped a dime of that? No. A tree once fell in my yard. I submitted an insurance claim. I got a check for $43. I've been paying $22,000 a year for 20 years or so. That's close to $500,000. And I received a check for $43.  I'm going to pay nothing from now on. If something goes wrong I'll pay for it out of the $500,000 I'm amassing in the bank.



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187,213 I need to seriously know if women realize what they are doing. I was in a meeting room with I'd say 50 people, all professionals. 5 were seated at the front table to do all the talking. The rest of us were in the audience. Just as the meeting started, a very pretty young woman came in. She was about 25 and very hot. She was wearing a very short billowy dress that only extended a few inches below her privates. If that didn't turn enough heads, what she did next surely caught everyone's attention. There was a handout for the meeting on the front table with the people speaking. She walked up there in full view of everyone, and not wanting to get too close to the speakers I guess, she leaned way over to take one of the handouts. Her back was to the audience, and by leaning over, her dress rode up and we were treated to a view of her derriere. She was wearing a black thong. We saw her butt crack as well as the little triangle of cloth covering the bottom of her pussy. Everyone in the audience dropped their jaw.

Like come on, can a woman be honest here. Isn't that kind of move done on purpose? Or are we to believe she accidentally exposed herself to a roomful of people? How can she not know she exposing herself?



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187,212 The tires on my car are bald.



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187,211 Sometimes I get really sick of being the one understanding person in most social situations. Everyone in this world is so hurt, and is hurt by past hurt reflected in present hurt. So why can't people understand?

It just drains me. I hate that people flock to me because I seem to be the only person around who can say, "I get how you feel, even if it doesn't validate your actions. I forgive you, because I know you're hurting and you're lost. I will hold you accountable for your actions, but I won't make you feel like you're intrinsically a fuck-up."

I get that it takes a lot of patience to do, but the world wouldn't be full of so many shitty people if people could realize we're all going through different versions of the same struggle. I'm tired.



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187,210 My hubby says things during sex which he should not. He talks about getting a man to come into our bed and having anal intercourse with my hubby. A wife does not want to hear this type of talk.



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187,209 All you can really do is take responsibility for fucking up, resolve to do better and work on the issues that led you to make these choices. Right now the true impact has yet to feel itself and it's going to hurt badly for a while. So it goes. Rebuilding your integrity from the ground up and making amends without expecting forgiveness is the only way to move forward. It will suck but if you can do that you'll come out of this stronger, kinder, and better able to be there for the next person in your life. This does not have to be your destiny forever, but you do need to accept the consequences in the meantime with dignity.



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187,208 I have a robust fantasy life.  But at least it's a life.



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187,207 I have a friend who got caught having her third affair in the last 4 years. She is blaming everyone but herself.  You choose to get naked and fuck someone other than your husband multiple times, you really need to accept some fault.
Not the best choice



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187,206 I can't stop crying now. I'm so ashamed of this failure I've become



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187,205 Naw, zero sympathy from me. You know you got here with the choices you made. You had so many options to figure things out and people on the periphery like me who loved you and could have helped you. I even get the temptation to stray when things are bad. I've been there. You could have talked to me FFS.

But at the end of the day these choices don't happen in a vacuum. They reverberate and affect everyone around you like radioactive fallout. The entire social fabric of everyone you care about is in jeapordy, as friends and family take sides and fight each other over it. This isn't a mistake you just come back from.

Picard said it best to Alkar. "You exploit the innocent, because you're unwilling to shoulder the burdens of unpleasant emotions. Well, this time you will be held accountable."



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187,204 5 months. 7 job interviews. 7 rejections. My soul is so tired from getting my hopes up only to be let down each time. And each time, the rejection stings deeper. I am ashamed. :(



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187,203 Regret nothing.

At one time it was exactly what you wanted.



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187,202 I'd love to know what category she has me in?  Based on recent discoverys it's a whole new category of its own I'd say? But who knows, maybe that list is a long one too!!!!



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187,201 It's hard to breathe. It hurts to be where I am. It hurts and angers me to know I brought myself here.



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187,200 I've tried to shop at my mom and pop local stores, instead of the big name retailers up on the highway in the next town. It's hard though. I find the mom and pop stores charge more. I don't want to pay more.

But a few weeks ago I needed to by a new inner tube for my wheelbarrow. I checked out the price at that giant hardware store. $18. I meant to get it but was distracted by something else I needed. So I forgot to buy the inner tube. I came all the way home before realizing my mistake.

I didn't want to drive all the way back there, so I decided my punishment would be to buy the inner tube at my local hardware store.

I was shocked. The local price was only $12! Like wow, local was cheaper! Who needs those big retailers! Go suck dirt. Shopping local was the way to go!

I brought the inner tube up to the register and explained my glee to the manager, that the local store was cheaper than the giant store.

I get home. I take off the wheel. I put on the new inner tube. I have to use a screw driver to pry the tire back in place. I slip. I puncture the new inner tube. F*ck me! Moan. Sigh. D*mn.

I have no choice. I go back to my local hardware store to get another inner tube. I bring it to the register. The manager tells me it costs $20.

What? I explain I just bought one an hour ago and it only cost $12. She shrugs and says the price just went up.

See what happened? The local store realized they could charge more compared to the larger store, so they upped their price. What little sh*ts. The American way. Screw people if you can get away with it.

I declined to buy the inner tube locally. I drove back to the giant store.

I hope all mom and pop stores go out of business.



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