I tell you Im a lesbian, and you kinda laugh and don't believe me. Hell, if I were you I'd gladly accept that, because if you don't think I'm gay, you must feel pretty shitty that I didn't have sex with you once over the like 3 years you've been trying.
stupid boy.

I hate seeing people. I hate being polite and holding the door for anyone. I hate seeing the bank tellers and the post office workers every day and talking about nothing. I have no desire to get to know these people. They stand behind the counter and stare at me but I say nothing more than 'thanks'

I'm bad at small talk. I'm bad at socializing. Yet I own my own company and I'm a size 2, I'm 24 and I'm blond.

I don't answer my phone unless it's my mother.

I cancel every meeting I've ever booked.

I chicken out of life. Basically.
What am I going to do?

If I was a 35-year-old virgin, I don't think I'd be high-fiving myself.

deleted

My secret is that I get VERY emotional when I don't get any sleep. The trouble is, I'm an insomniac and I end up on the internet late at night. So I wake up the next morning to these embarrassingly morose status messages and blogs (most of which I end up deleting), obviously written with the mindset that the whole world is against me, because at 3 am I seem to think that. I'm also in the habit of getting into very intense IM conversations with people that I normally ignore just because they too are insomniacs and we banter back and forth about some pseudo philosophical nonsense for hours. I can't read any secrets either because if anybody puts anything sad or negative, insomniac me assumes that it was written with me in mind. I'm just glad nobody called "me" a fatass, because then I'd still be crying.

I need Ambien.

  I saw a car crash once. Never forget it. Not just the crash, but what happened next. It was about 10 at night. A dude buzzed past me doing like 80 on a small country road. A minute later I saw his car bent around a tree. I got out to see if he was alright. He wasn't. He was unconscious.  His face was smashed and the tree trunk had crushed the engine which in turn was crushing the dudes legs. The sight almost made me hurl. I went for my cell, but got no reception, so I ran 100 yards down the road to a house. A dick answered the door and I explained what happened and asked if he could dial 911. The fucking prick said no. He said he didn't want to get involved. What the fuck? Some kid is dying and this asswipe can't make a phone call? I ended up going down the road to the next house and they called the cops. But I'll never forget it. If you're dying in the street, there are those among us who'll look the other way. What fucking assholes.

Whenever I wake up and see her, I have to blink twice and remind myself it isn't you anymore... And then all I want to do is go back to sleep. To dream about you more. When I go to restaurants, I look at the menu and imagine what you would get if you were the one with me. I remember how into sports games you used to be... All leaning forward in your seat... It was adorable. I remember how tight you used to be... I wish I could get that back. She's great, but she is no you. When I think about my future, I still see you as my wife... When I get into my car, I remember driving in that back alley singing that song as loud as we could together, in the middle of the night. I remember smoking cigarettes with you, how much my dogs loved you, and the loving real conversations you would have with my family... I remember everyone I cared about would meet you and say, "Take care of her, she's a beautiful girl". I am so happy where I'm at, but I will never be complete without you. When she watches those shows, I remember watching them with you. I remember talking about baby names with you. I remember all those "pregnancy scares"... You would always get so scared. Sometimes I would be scared too, but I would always pretend to be 100% positive everything would be fine. You loved that about me. I remember the smell of your hair, and how you didn't always make me pay. I remember our tickle sessions, and when you busted my lip. I remember you used to hate it when I would get mad at you... It bothered you so much. I remember eating at the tackiest places with you, but you couldn't care less, you loved the food just like me. I remember all the mistakes I made. I regret them every single day. I will never forgive myself for letting you go. I will never lose the passion I have for you. Nothing will ever be as fun with her. Nothing will ever feel like forever. And that picture in Vegas... I wish we would have gotten the chance to frame it.. It really was beautiful... We always looked good together. So different, yet so alike... I will never forget you... I will always want you... I will always miss you... When you find you, come back to me.




This is what I wish he would say to me.
Please, baby, I still need you...
I won't stalk you, or bother you, and I won't break my promise, and yes I've moved on, and yeah I'm alright, but nothing can replace the space in my heart for you... It's getting cold again... All I want in the world is to feel your arms keeping me warm... My life will never be the same without you... I take it all back. You are perfect. You were perfect. I am so sorry for ever making you feel less than what you are. You deserve someone who will let you do whatever you want, and accept whoever you are. I could be that person. If you love me, please say it.
It's all I want.



I know... I know.. you're never coming back... she is all you ever wanted.

come see me tonight (:
then I will know...
I wish I could hug you...

Dear A.D.N.,
              You are such an idiot.

Last night i watched the Biggest Loser and I said to myself I would fuck that fat chick on the blue team

I think the Catholic Church blew it with that one bizarre rule.  A Catholic can lie and cheat and steal, but if they go to church on Sunday for an hour, all is forgiven.  Doesn't the Vatican get it?  They have given Catholics a perpetual Get-Out-Of-Jail-Free card.  Catholics can act as bad as they want, but no matter, say a Hail Mary and you are good to go.  Catholics are the worst hypocritical people I know.

wow i feel like a sugardaddy. buy this, can you pick up that. can we do this. meanwhile my supposive girlfriend is screwing someone else or working on trying too. thats messed up

it felt good to get things off my chest. just cant figure out why your seeing someone else while having a relationship with me. ive never been so stressed. its obvious you have ass on the side. you dont just go from fucking every night to fucking once a week if that. since you started facebook and are running into people you know or meeting people your messaging gets you nervous around me. act like a girlfriend! were not in high school. i will say this though i may love you if i keep feeling this way or you dont stop your childish bullshit with facebook myspace and secret text messages im going to do the same and take advantage of the constant fuck me innuendos im getting from a few others. step up grow up and treat me like i should be treated or im going to fuck someone else and you wont even know it. hows that make you feel

I've gott a naughty school girl outfit, and I am going to wear it.

One of the hottest things I fanitsise about is you fucking your self into your hand mummbleing very irotice dirty things to your self involveing me and not expecting me to see.

I wonder if you have noticed how much we've grown apart?

I'm so nervous...I hope I have the guts to go through with my plan. I will tell you I have a "gift" for you, tell you to close your eyes. Then after a second or two, I will softly touch the side of your face and pull it toward mine to give you a sweet, soft kiss.

Then you will know the truth.

What happens next is up to you!

I <3 my sugerdaddy!

I love you with all my heart. You are mine I am yours. We are enaged, but waiting, a while to make it official. You are my yin to my yang, the cherri- to my o. I see no reason for us to be splitting up any time soon, you give me butterflys, and I love you so much.

If for what ever reason You broke up with me, or it just didn't work out. After I rebuild myself and the scars heal.

I can see myself with realy sweet older guy. I mean really older, as in currently I am 19, and he is 27.

He has made it known he likes me, but also knows I am feircly loyal. And respects that in a woman. He is close to me now in a best freind way, and is also in a happy loveing relation ship.

We have talked, he has heard the heart crushing sorrow of what if he finds another woman, or I am no good? He understands I am yours, he knows that he has no chance of wooing me into his arms and out of yours. If he did that I would loose all respect for him, and never talk to him again. Its wrong to try and steal another persons woman.

I feel guilty for even thinking, about this. It soothes the what if bug though.  Knowing that I wouldn't have to face the world alone, if you left me.

I feel like shit, honestly do. But how do you explane this to the one you love with out comeing off badly?

easy you dont

my laptop has a built in web cam. I heard tthat there are virous programs and spy ware that can hook th that cam and I would never know.

In an attempt to keep this from happening. I started working on my laptop naked or listening to music after a shower while I am still naked and driiping wet. Just meditsing makeing sure the cam is perfeectly angeled at me.

I hate my self, no matter how many times I hear how supposedly beautiful I am or how many times I hear how I am pretty, and looking good. I can't help but think that the guy/gal watching my cam for my ss number, will be so utterly grossed out that he aborts my particular computer. and moves on to some other person.

Then again, I could become his/her vavorite cam veiw. The woman who parades around naked.

I am the only person who finds me un attractive.

>.< This is bad huh?

Im a lesbian, I look like any normal straight girl. But Im gay.
and I absolutely L0VE stealing guys 'straight' girlfriends from them.
It makes me feel awesome bout myself.
I feel like I can have any guy, even though I dont want them, and any girl.
Yet, Y0U are beyond what I just 'want'. I dont want you because Ive yet to have you. Thas happened before alright...
I want you, because I want to give you the world.
And I WILL whether you are my g/f or not.
I absolutely adore you. I am absoluetly in love with you.

I want more than anything to be emotionally okay. I'm tired of approaching everything with a preemptive game plan and waiting for a 2 ton weight to drop on my head. I want to be loved for just me, not over-the-top, crazy Super Me, and I want to love without being terrified that, at the next opportunity, you're going to fuck me over. I blame myself for a lot of this, but that goes back into the blame game that my dad perfected so well with me. Growing up I was taught that pretty much everything was my fault so I feel more comfortable in life when I can assign blame to myself or find some way in which I've failed and ruined everything. It's sick. It's a ruinous mindset that keeps me in a vicious cycle of self-defeat. I know it is and I'm tired of beating myself up about everything. I'm tired of pacing the floor at night anxiously awaiting more hurt. I want my life back...or maybe the life that I never really got to have. I'm working on it. I'm trying. I still struggle. I'm sure I'll struggle for a while until I can shake this pattern. But I wish you'd see that, underneath this tinseled shell, there is a woman worthy of your time and care.

deleted

I just realized that you don't love women. You hate them. You cheated on your wife and go against her wishes because of the way your mother was when you were younger. You're an addict. You have rape fetishes. You like to be degraded by women yet you want to be the one in control. I wonder if you realize this.

Sonny boy, you are the one who stopped calling me.

My Husband had an affair with his FAT OBESE exgirlfriend within our 7 month marriage. What a Pig! Little does he know I had my pussy ate better than ever...was able to cum in various positions and it wasn't him! Two, my friend, can play that game...playa!

I would like to watch a man have sex with my wife.

I hate how people always need to mention drugs when they talk about trance etc.The music is what kick ass.You don't need drugs to realize that.

I have the perfect invention but I'm not smart enough to make it work. I almost bet that it'll be built and pantented right as I die. Oh well, if I have kids, it'll be there for them. I want to give it away, but if someone reads it on here and makes it, I would know they got it from me and I wouldn't be able to tell anyone.


Oh well.
Someone, make an item that will be REQUIRED to be in EVERYONE'S home. This is what it is:

You pee, poop, or give a blood sample in a little machine EVERYDAY. This will tell you what is wrong with you. Cancer, Diabetes, hell, even a bone spur. Even if it tells you "Scratch on knee. Barely infected."

Seriously, I'm tired of being sick and every doctor say "It's hard to determine." Going to bed sick everynight isn't gunna cut it anymore. I need more of an answer. Goverment, make something more useful. PLEASE!

Whenever I'm in a relationship, I some reason always want out. I'm in the best relationship ever right now, but for some reason, it doesn't live up to my standards. We are the same person, I am my absolute self around him, and he's always there to support me and be there for me. He likes to argue though. That irritates me. He always wants to argue and he's always right. We discuss it, then a week later, he still thinks he's right. Guess what honey? Sometimes, not ALL the time, but sometimes, you are actually wrong.

My secret? I have always wanted every relationship that I've ever been in to end by HIM cheating. To me, it's the least selfish route. Except, I want it to be drunken cheating. Think about it, he says he loves you and wants to gve you the world, blah blah blah.. Then he gets drunk that he cheats on you. He feels like shit, feels like a loser, feels like the worst person ever. He cries and apologizes and you leave him. You look like the good guy. People feel bad for you even though you secretly wanted it to happen. He tries his darndest to get you back, to apologize, to make things right again. He lays in bed every night realizing he screwed up. Then, you look really hot, go to where you know he'll be, and remind him of what he can't have. If you miss him and want him back, he will be SOOO wrapped around your finger that it almost cuts your circulation off.

Maybe that's selfish of me. Maybe not. But one day, I'm gunna get my boyfriend so drunk and pay a girl to flirt real bad with him. I'm gunna tell her to get him to kiss her. Then I'll walk in. He says he'll never cheat, but I want to see how much I mean to him. Lately he's been kind of an asshole to me and making me feel like shit. Like I'm not good enough for him.I know this is the 8th grade route, but I'm taking it.

Whether you are or are not should be none of my business.  So why do I keep thinking that it is.  

I need to shape up and realize you're no good for me and where I want to go.

I'm hurting, which is crazy because I don't even know for certain if I have reason to be. I still love you because I don't know when to give up. If you did have sex with somebody else knowing how I feel about you, I'd like to know how I failed. :( I wish that I didn't still want you but I do. Please talk to me if you can.

You're still so sexy, cryptic and mystereous.  

Oh well, I miss you.

I hope you are happy out there in no man's land.  I bet you will be.  :)

Stay as you are.  

It was good to see you.  I smiled the whole way home.

Friday you texted me to see how my grandma was doing. That was sweet, thank you. You knew I was a mess, so you told me that you'd be there for me, blah blah blah. Okay, thanks. Then you said "love ya." I know you say that to all your friends. I know you said it to "be there for me." But why the fuck would you say that?! Those reasons are not enough for me. We dated for a year and a half and you thought I was the one. I think I thought you were just because I felt stuck.. so our past STILL doesn't give you that right to say that. Then you said something like "I want to be friends again." We didn't exactly stop being friends. I got a boyfriend which is why you hated me anyways. He was the one that got us together. Then you moved 12 hours away for school, and still somehow blamed it on me. So, IF we did stop being friends, its your fault. I didn't know we stopped being friends, I thought we just went out seperate ways. What cracks me up is you said "Love ya" THEN said you wanted to be friends. What kind of sick fuck says Love ya to someone they aren't even friends with anymore?

Then, yesterday was mine and so-and-so's anniversary. You didn't know, but I didn't want to remind you. You kept telling me to talk to you so that I was okay. Ummm really? I'm not fucking suicidal or something. I'm fine. My grandma was sick and in pain, thanks for being there for me, but I can handle myself. Plus, again, you aren't the one I would go to anyways. You think you were always there for me, except you were always the wrong person to go to, which made me realize that if I had a problem, I should go to someone else. But I guess I should be thankful that you tried. I told you I was busy and you stopped for awhile, but then you started texting me the dumbest fucking texts again. Seriously, if I'm not talking to you after I said I'm busy, then DON'T TALK TO ME! So you called me in the middle of our sex. First call in months. I got nervous. I almost puked. I had to pretend it was because I was annoyed, and I was, but at the same time, it made me miss you. Why? I don't know. You are everything that I hate. I don't know what I miss about you.

I was doing just fine, not thinking about you, and you randomly start talking to me again. We can't keep with these little mind games. Back and forth friendships and such.. what is this? 8th grade? Anyways, so I started thinking of you again. On my anniversary, I layed in that hotel bed thinking of you, trying to keep him off me. I had to get in the shower, sit in fetal position, and think about you. ON MY FUCKING ANNIVERSARY. So the night when on and I stopped thining about you.

I woke up this morning with the call saying my grandma died. It's almost like you knew. No one in my family talks to you and I hadn't even told anyone yet, and you texted me. You said "hey, how r u doin? holdin up ok?" I guess I shouldn't be surprised. You always did know when things were going bad. You say God told you, and I guess maybe.. But I responded, which pissed my boyfriend off. I told him that my sister texted me at the same time and I was answering her. Thanks, I'm lying AGAIN about/for you. I got ready and my boyfriend and I left the hotel and drove the hour and a half home. I texted you the whole time. We had a great conversation. I started missing you again. I don't know what it is. You aren't even that great of a person. I guess I missed the old times, the good conversation, and the fact that someone gets me. But I don't know why I miss it from you when my boyfriend and I are A LOT closer than you and I were. So we get to talking and we start talking about our inside joke about Hannah Montanna being the anti-christ. We always said we wouldn't watch her and always talked about how much we hate her. Well, now, I like her. You were watching the movie with your girlgriend or whoever and yet you were texting ME, your ex, about not wanting to watch it. We were getting along great. So, I got back to my boyfriend's house. I told you I had to go. Then, when he starts working on his car, you text me. Again, like you knew I wasn't busy anymore. Sometimes I think you are watching me and it freaks me out. So then I got bored with the conversation and you kept texting me. Telling me to "talk to you NOW." Yep, same person. You are "changing your life" and going to school to be a minister, but yet your still the same controling, selfish, manipulative bastard I met 3 years ago. I didn't answer the EIGHT -count that, EIGHT- texts that said to talk to you. Are you fuckin kidding me, dude? Then I finally say "Ya know what, I'm with my family right now, okay" and you had the nerve to say this: "well so what, I need help not watching this shit." SERIOUSLY?! Granted that I wasn't with my family, but still, you had absolutely no right to say that. I said "whatever, sorry" and you say "w/e dude, hope shit gets better. later." Seriously?! Really?! That just lost all feeling for you AGAIN. And you wonder why? I'm so glad I got away from that shit. You haven't changed. You tried getting people to convince me that you have. You fucking PAID people to tell me that! Are you that much of a desperate loser? Come on, dude..

I'm just glad that we hardly talk anymore. You were never worth it. No one likes you. Everyone talks shit about you behind your back. Not even your family or your best friend likes you. Everyone told me while we dated that I could do better and that you treat me like shit and that I'm the best thing that's ever happened to you. But since I got tired of your lies and bullshit for a year and half, I got rid of you. I'll admit, I yanked you around for a few months but you deserved it. Because I left your sorry ass, you hate me and then start missing me. As conceited as this is, I'm your drug. You can't get away.


Get the fuck over it.

All that is on my mind is sunday. I cant wait to see you. Hopefully i wont be too nervous.

I'm beginning to think that I am the one has the issues..not everyone else

I would be willing to sleep with our bank loan officer if he'd be willing to help my husband and me with our mortgage. My husband would never allow it but we're so desperate I'd do it behind his back if it would help us out financially. How has it come to this? I'm willing to essentially prostitute myself to save our house.

If you want us back, it is up to you to let me know.  You broke it off between us.  Ball is in your court, my dear.

your boyfriend's a piece of shit i don't know why you put up with him

Being cynical and distrustful of others has never helped you, but only perpetuated your loneliness.  All it's ever done is push people away.  Forget about the past, no amount of analysis or recrimination will ever change what's happened.  Please don't close yourself off to the world.  
I want you to be happy.  
I never wanted to hurt you.

I am still madly in love with you after all these years. Sometimes I sigh as I think of you. Is that so uncool?

i have the best cousin in the world :)

i did something so bad and out of character, i can't even tell it on here.

it will go to my grave.

Good things can come from unfortunate situations. I have two very special people in my life who are facing their mortality.  Hopefully, their end is not near, but no matter the time they have left on earth, they are living each moment to its fullest.  They see life differently and they can tell you the exact moment when their perspective changed.  Although I can't begin to say how I know they must feel, I can learn from them and be thankful.

They essentially turned off the treadmill that I was on. I am more appreciative of the strong and positive people in my life.  I avoid the negative ones.  It is amazing when you seek out the positive people in your life, all you need to do is look them in the eyes.  The negative ones controlled by their selfish desires have an emptiness in their eyes.  There is no compassion.  There is no empathy.    

I will forever be changed by these current experiences.  I am hopeful that I can initiate the path away from the negative things and people in my life.

I laugh off being raped so other people don't feel uncomfortable, but inside I'm still in anguish.

I wish you knew what you did to me. I can't sleep without nightmares anymore. I flinch at everything. The strong confident girl you raped, doesn't even exist anymore.

To the cop who gave me a ticket on Thursday, September 17th in Tampa/Brandon FL.:

Yup, I knew I was speeding. I admitted it to you. I don't lie about things like that. But your fucking yelling was absolutely uncalled for. Just write me the damned ticket, get the fuck in your car, and piss off. I'm not angry at you because you wrote me the ticket. I deserved it. I'm angry at uppity fucking assholes like you who like to yell at and verbally abuse others because you have a God complex.

To protect and serve? Where the fuck were you when I needed you? You sure didn't give a shit about me when I needed your help. And I'm sure that you're such a fucking asshole that you don't care. I shouldn't have to feel like you're going to take me to jail over a fucking TRAFFIC VIOLATION. Protect and serve, my ass. Rot in hell, you old sack of shit. Fucking asswipe.

she looks like a toad to me

i fn hate i cant stand to see what u do to ur son u r such a loser u suck at life u suck u suck ugly on the outside ugly on in the inside the worst kind I FFFFFFNNNNNNN HATEU!!!!!!

To those who have always cared,

You and your sister are my best friends.

Listening to music in the car, shopping during the winter, and stayin up late to chat have never been more fun.

You both have always been there for me, and I feel like I can be myself without worrying about being judged.

I haven't seen y'all in a few weeks, but I just wanted to say thank you for being in my life, and for always making me smile.

I can't wait to hang out this weekend.

What the hell are you flirting with me for if you have no intention on asking me out? With that gorgeous body, and those beautiful blue eyes, I guess you know you've got it goin' on. Stop messing with me, and make your move, big boy. If you weren't so sexy, I'd curse you out. I guess I'll have to curtly ignore you from now on. You sexy old man, you.

Whenever I think a secret might be from you, I check the spelling and punctuation.  When all of that checks out, I know the secret couldn't be from you.

http://www.etsy.com/shop.php?user_id=6528173

i could ruin so many lives, it's the choice i make not to.




just good to know your ALL coming down with me when and if i fall....

I'm such an idiot. How could I have ever thought you cared about me or wanted to be with me? All you wanted was a piece of ass and apparently you didn't care where you got it from. I'm sorry you're such a coward that you can't get yourself out of a relationship that makes you unhappy. I'm sorry I didn't kiss your ass enough or whatever it was that you wanted me to do. I'm sorry I listened to you for over a year. I'm sorry that I'm in love with you, though, after this, God alone knows why. I'm sorry I ever met you. I'm sorry for a lot of things. And it hurts. I hope you're happy with yourself because I'm sure as hell not happy with myself. Thanks for less than nothing.

My wife promised me that if I got out the ladder and replaced the burned out light bulbs in the kitchen ceiling, then she would give me a long overdue round of sex.  So two weeks ago I did my part and replaced the bulbs.  And......... nothing. No sex.  She says she is too busy.  She doesn't have 30 minutes to spare anytime during an two week period?

Ooops, the lights in the kitchen just burned out again......

Baby, we're going down the drain...
but I don't think you've realized it quite yet.


"The day came,
when the risk to remain tight in a bud
was more painful than to blossom."

You weren't there for me when i needed you most. I slept with someone else, i'm so sorry.

so I've been thinking of sending your wife a package.  Does she look good in purple?  Or maybe I should send her a message on Facebook.  Better yet I can do that and make sure you don't last too much longer at your job.  I have nothing to lose.  you on the otherhand......

Ah that's better.  I would never do that but thinking about what would happen makes me feel a little warmer on the inside.

Women might think twice about using the word "pussy" when talking about their private parts.  It is thought to be a derogatory word. From the French "puce"  (pronounced "poose")- meaning "flea".  When the word was used to describe a woman's pubic area, it was implying she had fleas down there.  Women, I think you need a new word.

What's more, "kitty", although pleasant sounding, won't do.  That word arises from pussy, as in "pussy cat"  and "kitty cat".

Vagina, in my view, won't work. It just doesn't feel right.  Any word with a 'V', although correct in shape :), is wrong in connotation.  To many unpleasant V words - vulcan for example.  The image of Spock should not be associated with something as beautiful as a woman's nether regions.

Another thing, woman should go on strike when it comes to wearing clothes colored puce (pronounced "pah-use").  The purplish color is thought to get its name from the tint of a woman's labia - which again originates with the word "flea".

It's all wrong.

Women, I think you need to grab hold of all this unflattering nomenclature and do something about it.

I was reading an article on CNN about how the recession had a greater effect on lower and middle class than the upper class. In the article, they noted that a household income of over $180,000 a year was the top 5% of the population. Due to a recent raise, my wife and my income is about $181,000 combined. That little stat made me feel good the rest of the day. And the article is totally true, we didn't feel the economic downturn at all, except that rent got cheaper and we now have a lot nicer of an apartment. Not bad for the poor kid who had to stand in the "free lunch" line at school because his mom made less than the poverty level.

It has so far been taking me 7 weeks to get my money out of an online bank. WHAT A FUCKING SCAM. AT first they said they would send it.  Then by two weeks later they said the account hadn't been opened correctly and I needed to fill out new account opening paperwork. WTF?  I AM TRYING TO CLOSE THE ACCOUNT AND THEY WANT ME TO FILL OUT ACCOUNT OPEN PAPERWORK 4 YEARS AFTER THEY HAD MY MONEY!!!!!!!!  Two more weeks go by and they tell me there will be a delay because they said that I filled out the new paperwork forms by hand.  Duh, isn't that what people do???  They wanted me to type the answer on the screen, then print it out and send it in.  I pointed out that my version of Adobe doesn't let me type directly into their forms.  They said get a new version of Adobe.  I said my older operating isn't supported by the newer version of Adobe.   They said install a new operating.  I told them to GO FUCK THEMSELVES!!!!!  WHY THE FUCK DO I NEED TO SPEND MONEY UPDATING MY OPERATING SYSTEM JUST TO GET MY MONEY OUT OF MY BANK ACCOUNT?  WHAT THE FUCK WILL THEY WANT NEXT??? A FUCKING STOOL SAMPLE????  THAT THEY CAN HAVE, I'D BE GLAD TO SHOVE SHIT DOWN THEIR FUCKING THROATS!!!!!!

Give me my god damned money already you fucking cunts.

I desperately hope that the MFA responds to my employment inquiry as soon as humanly possible.

I think America's largest and best natural resource is going to waste:  Senior Citizens.

What shame.  In general I find Seniors are wonderful, caring people.  They have a maturity and understanding that only comes from many years of experience.  They also have an abundance of free time that they want to fill.  

So why aren't they allowed to share more of their wisdom with the rest of us?

For example, the Seniors in my town approached the schools and offered to become reading tutors. They were willing to work with the kids both during the school day and as an after school program.  There was to be no payment for this.  The Seniors merely wanted to help.

The schools said no, claiming there would be an insurance issue.

I think this is lame obstacle.  I think the schools worried that amateurs like Seniors might actually work out and that would make the teachers look less valuable when it came to the next round of contract negotiations. So in order to protect the teachers' salaries, they were willing to not let the kids get smarter.  Isn't this counter to the idea of being a teacher?

So crazy.

Anyway, thank you Seniors for trying.  One day I hope we can work this out.   I think you are key to returning America to greatness.

I am dating you.  I love you.  But I am not sexually attracted to you.  I feel nothing for you in this way.   I'd do anything for you.  But I have no wish to be in a bed with you.  How strange.  It's not me.  I do have sexual feelings for other women.  I even cheated on you once and loved the sex.  It's you.  I don't want to be mean but you are the opposite of an aphrodisiac. Again, I love spending time with you, just not sexually.

My very existence is totally at the mercy of my wife's crazy, volatile, erratic behavior.  There's never any telling when she's just gonna blow a gasket.  As a result, I'm depressed and miserable.  My kids mean the world to me and a divorce would devestate them.  My secret = I'm actually starting to hope she has an affair, so that I can leave this marriage as the good guy....

I wish it had occurred to me to take naked photos of my exgirlfriends during each relationship. That would be so great to have now. My advice to younger guys, do it. Get photos of them naked or having sex with you.

Confessions of a workaholic woman:

Sometimes I work 16 hours a day. Okay, okay, I'm lying.  Most days I work 16 hours. Don't get me wrong. I love it. The many benefits include the money and a ready built in excuse as to why I don't have a boyfriend, because I'm working so hard!!!  But the confession, by working so much I don't always plan out the laundry situation very well. Some days I'll get up for work and suddenly realize I'm out of undies.  So I wear none on my way to work, but I stop by a nearby store and buy a 3 pack.  As soon as I get to work I slip into the bathroom and put a pair on. I fully hope to run this department one day, but if people only knew this extremely professional woman is walking the halls early in the morning without underwear!  LOL!

i can't beleive i let you hurt me so bad i knew you i knew what u were capable of i really thought u were a nice guy i am sooo angry at myself for allowing you back in you suck so bad

I always wake up thinking about how much I want him in my bed. I'd wake him up with a blowjob, ride him or let him bend me over and do it doggy until we came, and then I'd go make breakfast. It'd be great! :)

You're nothing but a sex noobie who will sleep with anyone because you think it's wild, daring and new. I have sex, sure it's just with my boyfriend (and secret sex slave) and I don't brag about it, but you do and it's annoying and embaressing and uncomfortable. Also I wouldn't be suprised if you ended up with a disease or pregnant by the end of the year...

Well I've fucked it up good and proper this time.

Shit

Can't stand the way you look at me at the moment , makes me feel sick

I'm so sorry , I'm such a prick and you are better off with out me . But I really do fucking love you so much A , and I should have spoken to you about the problems I thought we had this before I wondered off and did that

There's not enough Vodka on earth to help me through this

Just want to curl up into a little ball and die

I had an abortion 10 years ago, i was a teenager, and the guy i was with was off at college and it would interfere with is career plans, and i wasn't ready, neither of us were.  maybe if he was more supportive i would've kept him/her, but i didn't, but i won't totally blame him because i wasn't ready either.  and my house isn't the type where my mom would just accept it and be like "ok it's done, so now we'll support u." now, i am in my late 20's, and with someone.  i love this man, we have a volatile relationship right now, and every time we're about to end it, we just can't.  even though it would be healthier for both of us to.  He's very angry at me for something i did, and just can't get over it, and now he threatens me.  "if u bla bla bla, i will kill u and no one will know it's me." that kind of thing.  and he says things like this out of the blue.  so i finally saw this really bad side of him, and now i'm pregnant.  i know if i have this child he will forever be in my life, and he is very possessive, so it's not like i will be able to peacefully go somewhere else and raise this child on my own.  I wasn't thinking about having the abortion, but out of no where he tells me if i have an abortion he will kill me.  and i know he means it.  that very attitude is what may make me have one, because how can i bring a baby into this world with a man like that?  that shows he will use that threatening way with other things in our lives, and what if one day his temper turns on his kid?  i just think it's dangerous for me to have his child...
A

ok whats it gonna be next time? the reason for being pissed? will you ever be happy? sometimes i wonder if this is even worth it. ive never been so freakn paranoid as i am with you. you can snap or get mad at the snap of a finger. i love you but you cant wrap me around your finger. look in the mirror what do you see? i see someone that will never be happy no matter what. i see someone who steered their life in a direction that only benefits you. i see a lonely person in the future if this crap doesnt change. when we go out from now on you will pay for your own entertainment. i am not your personal atm. christ try making me a cup of coffee 1 day. try doing something nice for me. try buying me a nice gift. am i just round to maintain your growing bank account by spending all my hard earned money trying to please you?????

please dont become an alcoholic

When I die, the first thing I want to see and hug, is my cat.
God, I hope you're not angry at me.

I daydream about stealing my moms wedding ring and pawning it for cash.
I know I will one day. And Ill feel so guilty because she really loves it.
But then again, she has ALWAYS hated my dad, so that makes me feel less guilty.

I wish I had the WORLD, just so I could walk up and give it all to her.
18/f

Mom, Im not the little girl standing outside in that damn tree waiting for you to come home anymore.
I cant fucking stand the sight of you. I cant stand your voice. I cant stand that you love my neice more than you ever loved me or my sisters.
Mostly I hate how I wish you wanted to know me.
PS, You know Im fucking gay. Acknowledge it already!!!

deleted

I got in a fight for the first time in a while the other day. I got the living shit beat out of me. For some reason, that feeling of everythign happening so fast, my head getting beat into the ground, and the taste of blood mixed with dirt... really turned me on.
I want to properly meet the bitch that beat my ass, and fuck her better than her husband ever has.

I don't have a Myspace or a Facebook page, I don't Twitter or blog, I don't have an iPod and I don't have texting on my cell phone.

... and my car radio is kicking the bucket.

... and yet, s'all good.  I manage.  Email me, or call me - I'm old school and proud.

28/F

I honestly have absolutely no hope that Ill ever get my highschool diploma.

I have palmer hyperhydrosis which means my hands ALWAYS sweat profusely for no reason. And jus being able to comfortably hold my loves hand would be one of the most intimate things in the entire world to me.

Fuck you insomnia, you are such a waste, you steal my energy and my productivity. I wouldn't have this problem if I could just figure out how tk make myself cum. Seriously, how can I deny myself something I want so badly? I'm beginning to think I will die of sexual frustration. I need help :(

Nothing will go back to the way it use to be between us

and Im NOT sorry about it

You hit my friend with your car, an then left him to die alone with no chance.
I swear I will find you. and I swear you will pay.
No matter how long it takes, dont ever think Ill forget or let this go.
I hope youve never slept since that night. I fcking hate you for existing, because of you my friend no longer does.. and you dont deserve to either.
Youll get yours.

I like you.  I like you a lot a lot.  I like to cuddle with you and wake up with you, I like to listen to you and know your family.  I like to tell you things, I like that I think about you too much.  I like your heart.  I like your smile.  I like your eyes.  I like that your ticklish.  But I don't like that you're not scared.  I'm scared.   Not only does the distance scare me, BUT... we are so different.  I like to plan.  I like to be on time.  I like to be sober every once in awhile.  I like to work.  I liked school.  You're late.  You smoke cigarettes and pot everyday.  No job.  You're not into school. You don't have any money, unless it's from drugs.  I don't do drugs. I need to be a priority... I need to FEEL like a priority.  I need you to make me feel like a priority...  Please.

He cheated on you with me and then he cheated on me, with your best friend. You're fucking stupid for letting your friend go through the same hurt that you went through. I'm also fucking stupid for thinking that he'd be different with me.

Like you and I will always- Go fuck yourself.

I'm listening to On My Own from Les Miserables over and over, and all I can think of is you. What I wouldn't do to have you for real, and not only in my dreams.

I have the dorkiest little daydreams about you. I imagine showing you where I grew up and sharing my favorite kids book with you. Or just going to the park or taking you to Thanksgiving or Christmas. I can think of about a million little, mundane things that I'd love to do with you. I've never really felt that way about anybody before. It'd just be neat to get to share those things with you. I wonder if you ever think about sharing things with me.

Eh, probably not. But I can keep dreaming, right? :)

It's too bad you won't consider to move. That
shitty ex/seperated ( whatever you call it )
treats you all like dog shit.
Your life could be so much better.

I wish we didn't have to be so cryptic and awkward ):

I was at one time jealous of a flower because of how perfect and beautiful-looking they are. Thank goodness I'm not 13 anymore.

Abigail,

I'm touched. Honest, I am. I now know how you feel about me. I wish I could reciprocate in some way but I simply cannot. When you came in to my office this afternoon I really thought you wanted my help. It was going along so well until you touched me, then our eyes met, and we engaged in that one very long, lingering kiss. Then you pulled up your top and exposed your luscious breasts. God I wanted to dive right in. But I'm a teacher, you're a student, and Lord knows I really need this job. I don't know how I'm going to face you in class tomorrow.

Sex is amazing. Girls are called skanks or sluts or whores. But that's just stupid. If pleasure is given and pleasure is received, then everyone wins. Shut up stupid judgmental people trying to live in glass houses.

I'm bipolar.

My boyfriend can be so fucking stupid sometimes.

I just thought to myself "isn't it your birthday?" and then I got to thinking about the first time I called you on your birthday and how much fun it was.

My secret- I'm kinda bummed I won't be doing that anymore,  oh well, Happy Birthday.

I cheated on him and now I'm so scared he knows...

I have this thing. When I have a song I like and isn't waaay too popular I will play it, knowing that other people will like it too. But when they ask what it is or who it's by, I don't want to tell them. Simple as that. It annoys me. Especially when they say "Who's this by again?" like they knew the song. Laaame.