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you can email me at:

youyouyouyou@MSNBC.com




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     rules


Why can one perspon post X but I can't respond with Y...

Your post was deleted, not for the content, but because you were responding to another poster in a contensious way. We want to hear secrets. But we want to avoid posters picking fights.


Why was my post deleted...

It was deleted. But was reinstated after seeing it was part of larger discussion point.


I sent an e-mail a couple of days ago regarding a post in which a person's name is mentioned. I thought that was not allowed. What is going on?

Correct. No names please. But by that we mean no full names. It is okay to mention first names though, such as Edith or John or Bob because the names can't be traced back to a specific person. We would not want to insult anyone.


Why can right wing political comments, such as, "182137.
I'm hoping the new administration cancels Martin Luther King Day. It was a fake holiday to appease black people. It never should have happened." stay?


Left wing, right wing, all comments are welcome. But there have been many complaints about the same person(s) posting endlessly repetitive comments on Trump vs. Obama. Although an important issue, and not one that can be said publicly at times (therefore a secret), there was too much of it. But please, feel free to post a political secret as long as it doesn't harp endlessly on the same two political figures. Sincerely, thanks for understanding and thanks for sharing your inner political thoughts.


Please take down...

Agreed. Done. Thank you.


Is there a search function?

There is a new version of the website on the way. It will have a search function. In the meantime, if you are looking for something in particular, you could let us know what it is and I'm sure we can find it for you.


Where is the secret about the little girl's funeral ...

Here is the link. Secret #12286


I don't know why I'm banned ...

But you aren't banned... you just sent me this message. Maybe you are banned on another computer? If so, you need to send me the other computer's IP address and we can sort this out. Google "What's My Ip Address".


What if I know someone else's secret is about me ...

If you can believe it, this has never come up before. Soul searching, the intention of this site is to tell secrets, but I see no reason to make someone uncomfortable. Here's what I can do, firstly, you might be mistaken about the secret being meant for you. It has even happened to me where someone left a secret that I thought was aimed at me. It has probably happened to all of us. So why don't you contact me and tell me the city where the secret about you would have orginated. If you are correct - because I can tell through the magic of the internet - I will delete the secret and offer profound apologies to the writer. I hope this helps. I am never one for censorship, but this site is all in good fun and there is no reason to make someone feel uncomfortable.


Underage secret alert........

Missed that. Thank you. Kids shouldn't be here. They sometimes have an intersting take on life, but still they shouldn't be here and are routinely banned the moment they reveal themselves. It's a problem with the interent though. Can't really fingerprint people on the way in the front door, so it is nearly impossible to tell a poster's age. I do what I can. I wish I could do more.


Hi, I can't log in from my home....

Well... that's probably because you have been banned from the site. There are 4 levels of banning based on the intensity of your rule infraction:

1) You can see the site but can no longer post.

2) You only get a message you have been banned. You can't see the secrets.

3) You only get a Page Not Found error.

4) Demons start flying aorund your house. You have an odd feeling you are being followed. Someone has been rifling through you desk drawers looking for embarrassing photos.



You are at banned level 3. The good news is you are not at level 4. So maybe there is hope. Send me the IP address from your home computer and I'll see what I can do about clearing this up.

PS - To All, I'm kidding about level 4 OK? I avoid all contact with demons. But feel free to send embarassing photos for the upcoming gallery.


Sometimes a posted secret jogs.....

Contact me via email and I can tell you what the problem is.


I know what it was.....

No it was the one about making it rain in the office. I thought it was possibly someone trying to say silly things to mess up the board. Sorry if it was real. Perhaps you could expand it slightly so slow people like me :) can better understand what you meant

You are unbanned and thanks for your patience.


I love what this site is all about....

Thanks. I love it when someone says something nice. Usually people only write to me when they are angry because I deleted their post which would have gotten them in trouble with the law. So how nice to hear pleasant words for a change!


Why can't I see my posts? are they being deleted?

Yes, they are being deleted. I appreciate you trying to post, but please review the rules. The site is about secrets.


Hi! There was a secret about someone eating a whole pan of brownies....

37662


Hi, I just wanted to play hall monitor....

Thanks. Missed that. Yes, you can contact me through myspace. I prefer it because then I can see a face. This anonymous internet thing gets weird sometimes...


Hi, I am getting the banned message but I am not sure why....

Well, obviously you were banned because you... ummmm.... errrrr.... checking..... checking...... You were banned because...... rudeness, no.... chatting, no..... picking on my friend Ana, no.....

You were banned because I messed up! Sorry about that. If this website offered t shirts, I'd send you a free one :)


Hi, this site was recently posted on....

Thank you.


could u please direct me to the posting....

In the Best section, scroll down to #12286.


secret 30276. "i work and im not even of legal age to work yet."

too young for cave, methinks....


Thank you for pointing this out.

To the under 18 crowd, you cannot be on this site. Yes, I know some of you are mature enough to handle it, but some of you are not. And I have no way of judging who is who. So you are all banned. No offense. Sorry.


Hi... i remember a wonderful secret that i THOUGHT was in the "best of" section, but i don't see it anywhere... it was the one where the husband sewed up the womans teddy bear? do you still have that one? i would love to re-read it, it's one of my faves.
thanks much!!!

(love the site, almost a little too much, i'm obssesed #colon#) )...


I remember that one. Makes you weepy to read it. It was posted long before the "best" voting mechanism was put in place. Back then, I was choosing the "best" by hand. I must have overlooked it. So by your special request, I have now added it to "best". Scroll down and look at secret #1008. And I'm so glad you like the site.


Could you remove secret...

People love your secret. Look at all the votes it is getting. I will certainly remove it if you really want, but how about this, I took out the reference to the person's initials. Do you think that will keep it hidden from the other person's eyes? I really don't want to lose such a well written piece. But again, it's your call. Just say the word and I'll take it down.


Hi, I would like to know what I was banned for?

Well that's easy... you were banned for.... um..... ah.... oh my... you were banned for no reason at all.. I am hanging my head mighty low at the moment. you were banned by accident. Ouch! I don't know what I was thinking. I hit the wrong button somewhere and you were blocked. So sorry about that. They might want to rethink my employment contract here... Seriously though, my fault. You have written some beautiful thoughts on the site. Thank you.


I dont get it. I see posts that have broken...

You were banned for: A bird in the....

No offense, but that is just some silly sexual adage which has been floating around for years. I try to keep the board filled with genuine secrets. You have now been unbanned and I hope will continue to read and post.


...why was the sight down for a while...

That's still a secret... I will tell all one day.


...But I don't understand why you allow any secrets that mention cruelty to animals...

I'm not sure what secrets you are referring to, but in general, I try not to censor secrets or topics. As much as you or I might not agree with what is being said, I think it is important from a socialogical point of view to know that someone out there has these thoughts. A fabric is made by running threads at right angles. However, there are exceptions. Child porn being one of them. I delete it immediately.


22701 belongs on the editorial page...

I hear ya! But I guess what he's kinda sorta maybe saying is if he wasn't so wimpy he would move to canada. That's kinda sorta maybe a secret. Sorta. But just barely. I tend to give a little more leeway too when the thought being conveyed is somewhat interesting and different. Not that I necessarily agree with these thoughts, but I like to allow people the opportunity to say something if it is well thought out or unique in some way.


I just want to say how happy I am that the site is back up.  I think it's one of the most facinating sociological experiments to come out of the internet, and an amazing way to peek into people's hidden lives.  Thank you!

Thank you for your kind words.


why do your archives stop at 15000? there is something important from the past i need to re-read..

Sorry, space constraints. If you can tell me the general content or a few keywords, maybe I can find it and repost for you.

Send me your email if you want to keep it all private. excavecanum@yahoo.com


Looks like there is a little problem with...

Hi thanks. Big oops. Hopefully no harm done. Sometimes I cut and paste too quickly. Luckily it was a relatively tame secret.

Say, I have a thought for you. Could you email me please. Thanks.


... chatting with a previous post that seems to be deleted...

Yes, we saw that, but a tough call. The other post was a while ago and maybe this new post was an innocent coincidence. We couldn't be sure so we let it go.. But thanks for pointing it out. If ever you want to volunteer as a moderator, let us know.... : )


19974 - No doubt you will be erasing it...

Yes, we missed that one. Thanks for pointing it out.


I'm having problems reading the messages...

What machine are you using? Is this a standard web browser? If it is something specialized, tell me more and maybe I can add a CHANGE TEXT COLOR button or something.

Oh wait, are you talking about the CONTACT screen only. Hmmm, that never occured to me. If that's it let me know - easily fixed!

Voila... thanks for the suggestion! (I'd send you a t-shirt if we had such a thing.)


I have thoroughly enjoyed your site...

I'm not seeing it. Maybe you are quoting the wrong secret numbers? They sound like secrets to me. Sometimes one slips by me, so I appreciate your input, but I just don't see what your saying in regards to those you mentioned. Maybe tell me th gist so I'm sure we are talking about the same ones?


I posted the following secret yesterday...

It's still there. Look down the page.


I do not see my post, did you ban it?

Maybe. Can you tell me the gist?


I was perusing the site today and now it states...

If you would like to get back on the site, we need to talk. Can you send me an email address? Don't worry, I'm good at keeping it a secret...


...nothing I've ever sent has been published. I don't understand why...

Ah. The reason I don't put them up is because you have a tendency to refer to other secrets. But not a total loss. For example I took your last secret and removed the reference to others and put it up for you. Works well. You really say some interesting things. So if you would like to try again on some of your other secrets, I'd be very happy to get them up for you. If not, I understand. But I do hope you'll try. I think people will find your thoughts interesting.


I have a request, and it's a big one. I hope you'll understand...

I always try to honor requests to remove your secret if that's what you want. But in your particular case there is a problem. The secrets you mention are so old, I have no way of telling they were written by you. And you seem to be contacting me on a computer that wasn't the computer the secrets came from. Oh dilemma!! You see the problem? If I delete them and they were not yours, then someone else is going to be really offended. Can we do this - first of all, the secrets you mention are beautiful. Golden. You were very insightful. And seeing that they are not of an extremely personal nature, but more speaking to the general state of life, would it be possible in this case to leave them there? I think readers would really enjoy them and learn from them. I know that is not really the solution you originally asked for, but I'm hoping you will reconsider. Notice, I've never asked this of anyone before.


Last night I posted the secret about...

None of the above. Your secret was removed because you were talking about other secrets from other posters:

....but after some of the things I've read on here...

Sorry, but that never works out well because other posters get insulted and a verbal war engulfs the board. So your secret should be able to stand on its own. If you'd like to rephrase it, I'd gladly welcome it because I think it is very interesting what you are trying to convey.


HUMBLE PIE...

Sorry, that IP can't be unbanned. It sounds like it's not you doing it, but a very unpleasant person is posting from that AOL address. The only rememdy is to get a different ISP. So sorry.


... is a direct quote from the TV show House...

Thank you. Good eye. Deleted.


I just sent you a message about my being banned from my home computer...

OK. That is your work IP you sent. You will need to find you home IP and send that instead. No promises, but if you send your IP we can at least take a look at what went astray. I never want to ban anyone. But I think this site works because of zero tolerance for being rude to other posters. I think it's why people keep coming back. So send your IP and we'll see...

If you can't get to my IP checking link with your home computer, try this site: http://www.whatsmyipaddress.com to find your IP. Then use CONTACT again to tell me what it is.


hi, i've been banned, I'm not exactly sure what i did wrong...

You were mocking other posters. Why do that? We protect our own here. So sorry, you cannot be unbanned. Especially since you are "not exactly sure what [you] did wrong." You don't understand so I can't take the chance that you'll do it again.

And just from a top down point of view, how many posts do you see on this site where someone is mocking another poster? Zero. So why do you think it is OK?


I have been banned for like a month...

You are now unbanned. You had responded to someone and so I tried to get you to stop. Sorry the remedy was "reviewed" status. Harsh at best. You do have some wonderful insights. Thanks for sticking by it.

And to anyone else out there, if you have been banned, it's not the end of the world. It's the only method I have available to keep the site on track. You all probably enthusiastically respond to someone thinking you have a good point to make - and granted many of you do - but it just doesn't work out well on this forum. Too many fights. I think we've all had enough of that elsewhere in our lives. So if you are banned for chatting, just drop my a note saying you understand how this site works - and I think it does work well being limited to just secrets - but drop me a note and you will be unbanned. I'm very easy about this and Yreka, she's a pushover.


I have since posted a revised version of "what's" working...

Sorry, I didn't see the secret in your first post. But now I get it. I probably could have let the first one stand, not that I'm a good judge, but your revision is even better. But again, sorry about deleting the first one. Sometimes I have to separate the real from the pesky posters quickly and I do mess up. My bad. Thanks for sticking with it.


I wasn't chatting or really responding...

Sorry, but I had to delete it because you were responding about God to the post just before you. Please, no chatting. I like chatting, but just not here. It just doesn't work out well. People start yelling and the secrets get lost. Thanks for understanding. (Again). I as much as anyone know the feeling of wanting to respond. But we all have to refrain or this board would no longer be interesting to read. Just please hold yourself back.


I must have done something wrong, but I don't know what is was....

OK. That's an easy one. You pretended to be me and started yelling at people posting on the board. They were horrified and apologized to me. I then had to apologize to them saying it wasn't me. Etc, etc.

1) Why would you do that? You purposely hurt some people.

2) Why would you ask to be unbanned?

3) Shoo... Go away. You are not welcome here.


Hi, I was banned, I'm not exactly sure why...

Thanks for understanding. Please no chatting. It takes away from the secretness of the secret. You are now un-banned.


HELLO???? WHY WAS I BANNED????

Because responded to another poster saying "LAME". Why do that? Secrets only please...


I love this site....

There is no way to find out who anyone is. I'm no wizard on this stuff, but I think that is the nature of the internet.

But if you see any offensive posts, let me know and I can deleted them. I always try to, but sometimes one slips by me.


To home computer person, you are now unbanned. But please take care, secrets concerning bodily functions don't go over well here. Notice how there are none listed. They border on the ramblings of the High School kids that sometimes invade the site. I'm afraid if I left them in place, the kids would run amok. So I delete them. Hope you understand.


Hi there, I'm banned from my home computer...

Thanks for taking the time to sort this out. I'm not sure why I banned you. If you can get the IP addreess of your work computer here, I can tell you. Probably nothing bad at all, I still push your posts through, but I look at it first to make sure it is not chatting. Sorry, but chatting just doesn't seem to work well over the internet. Too many fights. So I try to limit posts to just secrets. Somedays I lose this battle, but I try.

But if you send my your IP, I'll see what I can do to unban you.


Why exactly was I banned? I found posts that were worse...

You didn't say anything bad. But you were seemingly trying to start a debate with another poster. "I always cringe when people preach to other..." which you said in response to a previous post.

Don't get me wrong. Debates are good. I like' em. But just not here. People come for the secrets. There are SO many other chat boards for debates.

Thanks for understanding and contributing to the board. You are now unbanned.


C., it's not you. It's your AOL account. Read what it says on the BANNED page about AOL users. Sorry I can't unban that IP address, there is a real creep who posts from there. I think you deserve a new ISP.


OK, you are unbanned. Thank you for understanding. To anyone else who is banned. Sorry, but I need to keep the site as just secrets. Nothing else. Or people would no longer come here. If you would like to be unbanned, send me a note that you get it. I do want you back.


12.39...... Thank you for being so gracious and understanding. If everyone were as polite as you, they could all be un-banned. The door is open for you again.


I understand what you are saying about keeping secrets for so long and you don't want any judgments. But what would you think about an optional comments area that you, the original poster of the secret, can choose to turn on or leave off? So those posters who want feedback can get it, but those who don't want it can forgo it.


You were banned because you said: "...after reading some of the shit here on CC..." I'll now un-ban you, but please be kind to the other posters here - and this website. Thanks for understanding. I know you are a good and interesting person and I'm glad to have you here.


M., Thank you for your grace. You are free to post.


I remember banning the American post. For better or for worse, my vision is to have no chatting between posters. For one thing, in my head anyway, it takes away from the intrigue of a secret if it is being openly discussed. A subtle point, but I think it works to have no ability to discuss it. I also think that banning discussions encourages people to post more because they will not be afraid of negative feedback.

Unfortunately so much of the internet is about people spewing venom at each other. I just don't want a site like that. They already exist and I think it brings out the worst in all of us. So note, I banned your bf but I first banned the person who was mean spirited towards Americans, in fact he was promoted to the banned for life level. People can be as rotten as they want to each other, but just not here.

Your bf is now un-banned. I hope he can just ignore the rude people. I understand more than anyone his desrire to respond, but in the end, it doesn't really help I suppose. And I'm sorry to be the police officer here. Believe me, I don't enjoy being in this position, but I have to protect the integrity of cavecanum and the contributors.

On the point about other back history posts referring to post #s. I try to delete them all - and there are many. So if you found some, it is only because I missed them.

And finally, I did see the post with the email address and I deleted it. You just happened to see it before me. As much as I would like to watch the screen every moment, somedays I can't. They won't let me bring a wireless laptop into certain rooms here - they say it messes up their equipment. I doubt that, but hey, I'm hardly in a position to argue, so the sight runs blind for a few hours every couple of days. But shhh, don't tell anyone, that's a secret.


On the annoying posts: Sorry about that. I tried an experiment yesterday and opened the gates to let all the banned posters in - thinking they might rise to the occasion of getting a second chance. Ha! They are now banned for life. You know the funny thing, when someone is totally blocked from accessing the site, I can see them trying over and over again to get back in. 10, 20, 30 times a day, everyday. So at least have the comfort of knowing that after their rudeness, they are being denied something they really want.


Very good points noted on why it is bad to have a comment area for secrets. And you are right, if people want their age and gender known, they should mention it in their secret.


Sorry you were banned. Your IP address is very similar to someone else who was posting rudeness. My mistake. You are free to post again.


AOL is really problematic. I'm surprised the 800 pound gorilla hasn't realized they are hurting their own customers...

But try entering this in your address bar:

http://www.cavecanum.com?aol

That way I can see your exact machine setup in the log files and might be able to adjust the restrictions to let you in.


Sorry. But "Today I ate 14 cheese sandwiches" isn't really a secret is it? And it comes across as some kid just playing around. I hope you understand. I think people come here because it is different than most chat boards. On this site, you don't have to weed through reams of racsim and rudeness and tripe to find a hidden gem. I try to take all that garbage out. I think that's why the site has become a little popular. Everyone's help in keeping the site interesting is very much appreciated. Thank you.


If you would like to be un-banned, I first need to know the address of the computer on which you are banned. The easiest way is to go here and tell me what number is displayed. This doesn't necessarily mean I'll un-ban you, especially if you said some amazingly bad things, but it might be worth a try. I'm usually fairly forgiving. But again, no promises.


You are right. Hopefully you saw I corrected my error.


A. very good suggestions. Thank you. I've been thinking about a comments area, but you see the risk. Secrets I feel like I can/should edit. But people's comments - I feel I must respect their words and not censor anything. - which might allow this site to decay into just another run amok board. But I'll think about it. There must be an approach in ther somewhere.


Sorry, it might be a secret, but it crosses the line into childish prattle. I don't mean that as an insult, but if I allow your post, then others might get the impression that anything goes... I hope you understand. And know that you are not alone. I remove everything on that particular topic.


I can not un-ban you. What you posted was so hurtful to an entire group of people. I make it so clear that I can not have people being rude. And unfortunately for you, you chose a topic that I personally found very hurtful ... we all have a secret.


Interesting idea about a optional fields showing gender, age of poster. Hmmm. I wouldn't mind hearing more comments form others on this...Thanks.




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